To think the level of state involvement many posters expect is bonkers?

[FaeryRing]

It seems like there is nothing the state shouldn’t be responsible for any more! Feeding your kids, getting them to school, hiring ‘behaviour specialists’ for every classroom because parents don’t want to discipline their own children, giving you money towards virtually anything you ask for because it’s not fair you have to pay for anything yourself.. I find it absolutely wild and don’t think it’s at all realistic or representative of what most adults believe?

The expectation from the entitled to be automatically be given council housing, subsidised childcare, free social care and a whole lot more is to me quite staggering.

Haven't you seen the examples in this thread of false economy? People who, if they had council housing or access to timely and effective support (NHS, social care, benefits) would need less from the state and or need state help for shorter periods of time.

PP have given examples of their own circumstances where this would be the case. There's also the woman on another thread who's fleeing DV with her child. Because of the lack of council housing, she might have to go to a refuge and give up her job and go on benefits. Talk about false economy (and cruel).

Then there's people waiting ages on NHS lists, who end up to unwell to work because their health has deteriorated so much by the time they're seen.

Or people in low paid jobs (that someone has to do) who need benefits because of the lack of council housing and so have housing costs their wages don't meet.

With childcare, although not applicable to single parents like your mum, nowadays housing costs mean it's less affordable to be a SAHP and both parents have to work. There were also a lot of publicly funded nurseries and similar in the 70s, so there was childcare.

Very different from when I was growing up, one of three children, in a one parent family in the 70's. She budgeted, scrimped and saved. There was no real handouts from the government or anyone else for my mother except from her best friend and my grandparents.

The lack of SH today means that would be less possible. The support from her best friend and your grandparents. People are being told to move away from family, friends, and support systems for cheaper housing (despite that just adding housing pressure elsewhere). There's less community help today because communities are being split up.

Also in the 70's a much higher percentage of people had council housing, and private rentals were rent capped. Squatting was legal then too. There were also more and better public services.

Yep. Often also very high crime rates. Without support in place, crime increases.

We ve record numbers of people IN work.

Yes. Other threads have discussed this. There's actually not enough jobs for everyone. More people out of work than there are total job vacancies.

You don't need a qualified/experienced dentist to give "advice" on brushing teeth!

There are extra costs though. Travel to Hospital appointments, shoes to fit over her othotic boot that cost a fortune compared to regular toddler footwear are just two extra costs I can think of right now.

That is true, it's still better than a standard 16 hour contract on nmw though.

He was entitled to the carers allowance though, I don't know how that affects uc though, all I know is my daughter is now paying back his debt which is totally and utterly unfair!

I do think that the government gets into some weird parts of people's lives but some posters ITT are really sink or swim.

I mostly just think we should be able to smoke inside, take drugs and enjoy ribena.

I'm not about gutting the NHS or removing essential safety nets.

Govt can build roads, infrastructure etc. They should devolve health.

I think teaching kids essential life skills should probably be done at school, if kids aren't getting their teeth brushed then someone needs to help them do it, if their parents are failing them. Improving the lives of the youth benefits everyone. If you don't want to be involved in any pastoral care at all I wonder why you're a teacher.

There’s a lot of social Josip g that is sublet and the ex tenant / landlord makes a fortune - some are turned in to Air B&Bs and raise a high price especially round London.

Cleary these properties aren’t being let for their intended purpose.

Government need to employ people to sort this out.

She hasn't seen a Dr or anyone else other than the orthotics dept since diagnosis. We are working in the dark with her to be honest.

How old is she exactly? Is she not under child development clinic?

Our Child Development and Neurodisability Team have expertise in the assessment, diagnosis and management of cerebral palsy. We work with children and their families from Sheffield and beyond to deliver therapy that maximises potential and minimises functional disability.
Cerebral palsy is an umbrella term used to describe a group of conditions that affect movement, posture and co-ordination. It can affect other areas of functioning as well including vision, hearing, speech and learning.
Children with cerebral palsy may have difficulties from birth or may have slow development of motor and other skills. A diagnosis may not be possible until the child is 2-3 years old depending on the individual child’s progress.
We have a range of specialists in our team, including specialist developmental and neurodisability consultants, physiotherapists, occupational therapists and speech and feeding therapists. We work closely with other specialists in the Trust to support children with cerebral palsy and offer a full service from birth to adolescence.

But was he technically entitled to it as the father of a disabled child, or did he actually need it, as it doesn’t sound like he did anything to support her?

there’s a big difference

@ShyPoet
i don’t know if that’s true, because I would need to look at all of the other countries and their systems and it’s quite hard from an outside perspective to even know where to start.

I don’t think it’s that black and white though. I agree that it’s a false economy cutting expenditure on support services and then paying people directly.

Where is the time to brush the children’s teeth coming from? If you have a class of 30 and 15 need their teeth brushed for 2 mins 2 x a day that’s an hour of the day. Where’s that coming from?!

that’s setting aside the fact you think it’s under “pastoral care” which it most certainly isn’t.

No idea what a child development clinic is, but no she isn't she is almost 2 and a half. She has a consultant who we saw once prior to diagnosis last summer, then she was given an mri scan in October last year, a few weeks after the mri scan we had a video call to give us the diagnosis of cerebral palsy left sided hypotonia, left leg shortening with talipes. An eeg was given as we thought she was having absence seizures, but that wasn't the case the eeg result said mild periventricular leukomalaxia and asymmetry with focal slowing on the left occiput and sharp transients whatever the hell that means, no one has explained to us what any of this means She still spaces out ar least a few times a week, the lights are on, but no one is home it's so strange. Also the physical problems and sleep disturbances, but we have no idea what to expect now or in the future. We are just looking after the best we can.

He was claiming it for looking after his father who had cancer nothing to with his daughter who thankfully he never really bothered with!

My daughter knew there was something not right from the start, but they kept saying she was paranoid as a 1st time mother. It was 18months before anyone took her seriously, but the diagnosis was relatively quick from there. She couldn't crawl and didn't walk until she was almost 2 and even now she can't walk any great distance, she kind of lurches when she walks and falls at least 10times a day. She does wear glasses, but is still waiting for a hearing test.

Well u wouldn't supervise tooth brushing individually surely. So after lunch ALL kids brush teeth while someone supervises. Done in 5 mins. .

I used to watch my kids brush their teeth at the same time

Tooth brushing isn't only a medical consideration it's a social one. social development is definitely under the remit of pastoral care

By disability payment, do you mean DLA @ChishiyaBat ?

Yes it was dla.

Ah, I just saw this. I thought he was claiming it for his daughter, which confused me.

So although he was clearly a complete scumbag, he wasn't doing anything wrong claiming Carer's Allowance?

Well not technically no, but apparently he should have told uc. I'm assuming they would have got less uc because he was claiming carers. Now my poor daughter is stuck with his debt. While he's getting 3 meals a day in prison!

Edited to add she didn't know he was claiming carers allowance, the 1st she heard of it was when they started taking money off her uc! She tried fighting it, but they said because it was a joint claim she is liable. Which is unfair as he was financially abusing her!

Are you sure she got nothing?

No council housing?
No milk vouchers?
No family allowance (available in the 70's to unmarried mothers too)?

It is really unfair that your daughter is having to pay off an overpayment caused by him.

Have you tried contacting your MP to see if they can persuade DWP to write the debt off given the circumstances? It would be worth a try.

But that’s pointless. 7 and under an adult needs to be brushing the teeth themselves.