Takeaways every night !

[Lookwhostalking25]

I am sure I will be absolutely jumped on
but I just cannot get the hang of sorting dinner out 😂😂🙈
single mum of 3 ( baby and 2 primary school kids, one of which is disabled ) widowed nearly a year now.
I can juggle about everything else but food I struggled before returning back to work but wasn’t too bad but since returning I just haven’t managed it.
today was day 14 of takeouts after going back to work 2 weeks ago 😂😂
please send me tips because I’m sure the kids will come accustomed very shortly to take our lives haha !

I agree with PP - small changes.

If some decent ready meals and semi ready foods help - go for it. Start slow, replacing takeaway with ready meals and prepped salads/veg. Add fruits, yogurts etc. Maybe try one of the partially prepped meal services like Gousto.

Merchant Gourmet do prepared grains/pulses which work well with other veg or proteins, there are other options like this - have a browse through an online supermarket for partially prepped food and frozen "mixes" of veg. Nothing wrong with omelettes or scrambled eggs and beans on toast either. None of us are perfect, just go for small gains. When you get to the stage where batch cooking is more realistic then add that into the mix.

You say DP did all the cooking - if you are not confident in cooking then Delia Smith has a massive website covering the basics, completely free to use. It has everything from boiling an egg to fancy catering.

https://www.deliaonline.com/

Bless you OP, you are doing amazing.
Jacket potatoes with various fillings, cheesy beans on toast, egg and chips, nuggets with salad or buy the steam bags of veg. If you don't have a toastie maker, invest in one! (Breville deep fill, I bought mine after reading something on here about them) I make up a packet cake mix and make little cake triangles in ours on toastie night! The kids loved doing that when they were younger. Offer fruit to ease the mum guilt.
At the weekend, do bigger meals. Pasta dishes, roast dinners, enchilladas or quesadillas. Homemade pizzas are always good and the kids can make their own, just buy the bases. We are also fans of the one tray meals in this house. I do potatoes and any veg we have or fancy with chicken thighs and drumsticks. I season the heck out of it and it's so tasty

I do like Hello Fresh and Gousto but they are a faff after a day at work and wrangling kids. I've spent up to 2 hours on some recipes before.

Keep marching on OP, I am sorry for your loss 💐

I'm sorry for your loss

If right now it's takeaways every night then realistically switching to frozen equivalents is bigger for you. Things like chicken nuggets/fishfingers/pizza and oven chips and absolutely fine meals. Fresh fishcakes are also good and easy, I live fishcakes with a packet of garlic herb new potatoes as a 'healthy' meal

Jacket potatoes are really nutritious if you eat the skin. Pesto/pasta with cheese, add in some chicken for protein (I find a rotisserie chicken is great for this). Again jars of sauce with chorizo or mince and pasta, also a ball of mozzerella torn into either tomato sauce or pesto with pasta is delicious! Spinach is so easy to add to pasta sauces if your kids eat it.

I also love a tray bake for an easy dinner

Most important thing right now is you and your dc are fed, and you are doing this. Don't beat yourself up about how you go about it

That sounds expensive, a takeaway for us lot is £30+.

My kids are becoming a nightmare for food, ot wanting what we're having so I'm planning on doing cooked lunches for DH and I that we can enjoy without complaint instead of proper dinners and then a big picnic dinner for everyone to help themselves at night.

The thing I’m confused about is would I be making their meals unhealthier by switching to easier options like chicken nuggets ?

in the 14 days they have eaten lots of veg / curry / stew / salmon etc and a McDonald’s 😂 but that’s always once a week
I’m going to need to learn quick because it feels like I’m going to ruin their diet by switching.

I lost my 22 year old son 2 years ago this month and my partner unexpectedly died 10 weeks ago and it just feels like cooking for me and my daughter is now right at the bottom of my list and just like you I'm not the mum I thought I would be. It's all very shit and we have been living on toasties and noodles with the odd takeaway, my daughter has dinner at school so her diet is better than mine at the moment but I'm gonna attempt to do sausage, mash and peas on Sunday 😂 ease myself back in. You are doing great in what I know is a really shit situation

Have you tried Cook... Frozen homemade meals. They do free delivery expensive but cheaper than taken out.

No and it’s part of a longer term change as well.
So nuggets, oven chips and veg is better than a takeaway. You can buy better quality ‘nuggets’ as well from M&S for instance.
Small changes just now is all to concentrate on just now. Takeaway is also expensive so better spending on better quality prepared food.

that’s awful. You have a lot on your plate so be kind to yourself.

I think I’d look at hello fresh in your situation- even if you did it 3 nights a week. Then have an easy night of frozen food and have some simple meals up your sleeve the other two days. The hello fresh will get you into the cooking.

I find handiest to it to cook up a load of dinners on a Sunday and freeze them. I also do a Roast - I get two nights from that. But buying frozen homemade meals in might be the easiest way to start.

Hats off to you, buddy. 3 kids to school, you're getting to work, and you are all fed at the end of the day. That sounds like a win to me.

Wow you have a lot on
I have 3 older dc and no disabilities, plus I'm single but my ex has the kids two weeknights per week and I struggle.

My main issue is my dc like to eat early so by the time i run in from work and have taken one of them somewhere, popped to the shops etc it feels like I have two minutes to pull something out of a hat.

I think planning is the only way. Slow cooker casserole, which is potentially hard to fit in to the morning routine but possible. Quick dinners of easy cook meat/fish and ready made salads maybe.

If there is any way to slow cook meat or chilli can have it with wraps and salad.

Pasta is always a quick one.

Maybe set yourself a goal and plan one dinner a week, then two and so on until you are happy with the balance

As a widow, I love this post.

The thing I’m confused about is would I be making their meals unhealthier by switching to easier options like chicken nuggets ?

Not necessarily, just buy good quality where you can.

Sirfry also good if you buy the vegetables and meat pre chopped

Gosh, sounds like you've got enough going on, don't give yourself a hard time over this, do what you need to do.

Some very, very quick easy meals:

Beans on toast

Soup with bread

Toasties

Hot dogs in buns

Sounds like you're coping with a lot and doing great 👍🏻

Sometimes life is hard and to do all things well is totally impossible. Don’t put pressure on yourself to cook, just surviving is enough!

When I had a tough time and was very busy, we used to eat a lot of tinned food. It’s actually proven to be just as healthy as homemade as they don’t contain preservatives and salt and fat like readymeals and other processed foods. Do a big bulk supermarket shop of tinned meals, frozen veg, microwave rice and pasta….
Tinned chicken curry with microwave rice, tinned spag Bol with pasta, tinned ratatouille with pasta…

Right, forget going straight to cooking from scratch, that will come later.

For now:

• microwave rice, katsu curry sauce, breaded chicken steaks and a side of microwave veg = katsu curry (25 mins)
• rice, onion, wine, stock and mushrooms = instantpot risotto (15 mins)
• spaghetti, nice pasta sauce, whatever veg you have, fresh parmesan, black pepper = (10 mins)
• packet tortellini, pasta sauce = (5 mins)
• curry sauce, chicken pieces or tinned potatoes (trust me), naan and microwave rice = (10 mins)
• baked beans heated, instant mash on top, cheese on top of that with a side of broccoli = cheesy bean pie (10 mins)
• takeaway Turkish platter, should last for a couple of days.

Start with stuff like that, then you can move on to the likes of Hello Fresh. For now it's just experimenting with what you find easy to cook, balanced with the short time you have. Making sauces and more complex dishes can come later. Pop a cereal bar or something in your bag to have in the car.

The no processed food brigade won't like my menu, but it's baby steps for now.

Oh I’d love this but I’d balloon! I used to be able to eat a scabby horse when I was younger and not out a pound on but now I’m early 40’s I can’t get away with it. Enjoy your takeaways OP!

Sharing a referral code so you get a discount on a thread posted by a widow with too much on is bottom of the barrel low.

You are doing brilliantly. My tip is don't worry about creating a 'meal' per se, especially now the warmer weather is coming. Bung some salad, protein, carbs on the table - let everyone help themselves.

You are doing great, you’re raising your kids, working, grieving, helping everyone else’s grieving - it’s called grief work for a reason.

If you do want to change things you could try a couple of nights to begin with - maybe nights when you’ve no kids activities or feel less tired (if ever) and try some of the quick tea/easy options and use takeaway for the rest. It really doesn’t need to be all or nothing.

Don’t under estimate how hard it might be emotionally for you picking up a house job that your DH did pretty much all the time, it’s a constant, daily reminder of your loss and it’s ok to find that really difficult. I’m guessing that while you were off work you had a bit more emotional capacity to cope, but may just not have the bandwidth right now to face cooking too.

Really just pace yourself, it sounds like your takeaway choices are varied rather than fish and chips every night (though, again, if that’s what you’re managing that’s ok too). It doesn’t need to be all or nothing.

Do COOK deliver in your area?
www.cookfood.net

It's my go to when I'm overworked and overwhelmed. I stock up the freezer and then use Deliveroo with a local grocery top-up shop to keep the vegetable drawer stocked up to cook alongside the frozen meals.

It'd be better and cheaper for you all than takeaway each night but still give you a break whilst you get back on your feet and into a more sustainable routine again.

Make use of ready prepped stuff

Rotisserie chicken
Frozen mash (or fresh)
Sweet potato chunks frozen ready to roast
Frozen veg
Trays of veg ready to roast

sorry for your loss.
it would probably be cheaper to get a housekeeper in one day during the weekend who can help you mealprep for the rest of the week? or even a cleaner in the week just to give you a bit of spare time.

also little time saving gadgets like a mini chopper. using pre chopped frozen garlic and shallots (available on ocado and most other supermarkets).

making a meal plan as others have said and an online delivery to save you going shopping. when I was insanely busy, I would cook one day a week and ready prep things eg. chop veggies, make sauces etc. so when home only takes a few minutes to put food together. currently I have found local home cooks who provide homecooked meals at a decent price. you can search in your area - Instagram is usually good.

This. 💐

I was a single parent to three and worked as a nurse. I cooked a lot of chicken, as it’s quite quick. I would do a chicken casserole with rice or jacket potatoes started in the microwave.

We used to have cheesy mash with baked beans.

Spaghetti bolognaise is an excellent standby, cook extra and freeze.

We had beef burgers chips and salad.

Fish fingers chips and peas.

Braising steak with mash and veggies.

Pasta bakes.

Jacket potatoes with various fillings.

HTHs