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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Takeaways every night !

596 replies

Lookwhostalking25 · 10/05/2024 22:41

I am sure I will be absolutely jumped on
but I just cannot get the hang of sorting dinner out 😂😂🙈
single mum of 3 ( baby and 2 primary school kids, one of which is disabled ) widowed nearly a year now.
I can juggle about everything else but food I struggled before returning back to work but wasn’t too bad but since returning I just haven’t managed it.
today was day 14 of takeouts after going back to work 2 weeks ago 😂😂
please send me tips because I’m sure the kids will come accustomed very shortly to take our lives haha !

OP posts:
Thread gallery
16
shivbo2014 · 12/05/2024 18:21

Quick meals that we have - Pasta Tuna Sweetcorn.
Pasta, bacon, philadelphia, peas.
Chicken gyros in flat bread, with veg sticks.
Pasta with red pesto and parmesan.
Croissants with melted cheese and veg sticks.

PurpleDragon19 · 12/05/2024 18:22

Completely understand your struggle OP! This has always been one of the things I have found the hardest even before we had our DD so I can't even imagine in your situation, so sorry for your loss 💔

We tried recipe boxes that did help a bit but still struggled with the time and clean up. We have started using a meal prep service (Simmer Eats but there are others too) which are essentially healthy ready meals. Costs more than making from scratch but less than recipe boxes in my experience. I also want to try 'stocked' but haven't yet which is batch cooked meals frozen in cubes which works out even cheaper, just need to reheat and add the side eg rice or pasta etc.

I used to feel guilty and that I was failing because I found cooking so hard, but at the end of the day we all have strengths/weaknesses plus I don't enjoy it. Lots of people have a cleaner so I feel like this is a similar luxury to that!

Mama2Boy2020 · 12/05/2024 18:25

Lookwhostalking25 · 10/05/2024 22:41

I am sure I will be absolutely jumped on
but I just cannot get the hang of sorting dinner out 😂😂🙈
single mum of 3 ( baby and 2 primary school kids, one of which is disabled ) widowed nearly a year now.
I can juggle about everything else but food I struggled before returning back to work but wasn’t too bad but since returning I just haven’t managed it.
today was day 14 of takeouts after going back to work 2 weeks ago 😂😂
please send me tips because I’m sure the kids will come accustomed very shortly to take our lives haha !

Mumma. The fact you lost your husband last year is bound to be a massive set back! Focus day by day. Its getting hotter now so maybe a few salad bits...my favourite is ham,egg,sweetcorn,cheese,boiled potatoes or baby potatoes and a bit of veg/salad or jacket potatoes. Tuna pasta. Can be enjoyed cold. Pasta bake. The possibilities are endless! I really hope you find the strength!

Also look into these companies that do meal kits so then all you have to do is prep and cook.

Either way I hope you've got local support. If not message me and we can spur each other on! We've had 2 cooked meals at home this week. The rest we've just eaten sandwiches etc. But the heat doesn't help haha!

Don't feel bad but just don't make a habit of it and you'll be fine!

Good luck mumma! Xxx

savethatkitty · 12/05/2024 18:29

Start simple! Buy pre made meals you can bung in the oven, lasagne, cottage pie, pizza etc. Microwave meals aren't too bad these days, lots of different varieties. Fruit plates. Bikkies & cheese, with ham. Cereal. Toasties. Eggs. Home made chicken/hamburger are easy... you are doing amazing.

Sleepytiredyawn · 12/05/2024 18:29

I fry bolognese off and stick it in the slow cooker on high for a few hours. It’s that days tea, plus it freezes down really well. Pasta and garlic bread takes no time once your home. I know it’s hard work once you get through the door and everyone is at you. It’s the worst part.

Buy in some frozen jacket potatoes too.

If the kids are on school dinners, I would choose something nice for lunch then make your teas easy.

I hate doing the food too. You have my total sympathy 💐

Packetofcrispsplease · 12/05/2024 18:44

Oh my I’m so sorry , what a lot to deal with and you’re also worrying about cooking xx
I get tired ( because I’m old 😂 and have a disabled person to look after plus my house is large )
On some nights I do things like fresh filled pasta 🍝 and sauce with a bit of salad 🥗 and / or garlic bread .
Omelettes and oven chips plus salad .
Tub of really nice new potato salad and those packs of pre cooked salmon fillets with maybe a bag of baby spinach .
Pre cooked chicken breasts with frozen sweet potato chips and maybe sweetcorn or ready made coleslaw .
Those pre cooked chicken breasts also work well sliced up in easy stir fries with lots of veg added too and some straight to wok noodles .
M& S tins of chilli and chunky chicken in sauce are good for a quick dinner added to other ingredients can make a nice meal .

Runningoutoftime99 · 12/05/2024 18:45

@Lookwhostalking25 those maggi bags are good . Throw some chicken breast in and serve with broccoli and rice or jacket potatoes or whatever you fancy

Lavenderblue11 · 12/05/2024 18:46

Lookwhostalking25 · 10/05/2024 22:53

This is the problem I have got in the routine of grabbing the kids, grabbing something on the way home and then abolishing it in the car 😂
apart from the whole money that’s being spent my car also smells like one of those food halls 😂😂😂

So are the takeaways just for you, or do the kids eat them in the car with you?

CuriousEgg · 12/05/2024 18:51

I’m so sorry. Thats sounds so tough. Please dont beat yourself up. I only have one child and have not experienced a loss like that and i’m still getting take aways 3-4 nights a week. And i love cooking so its not even that i dont want to.
i reccomend meal kits like gousto but i also have a spread sheet of recipes that are easy and quick and i save the links on. If that would be helpful, message me with your email address and i’ll send it over.

VeneziaJ · 12/05/2024 19:08

Slow cooker is brilliant! I bung a load of things in add a sauce and leave to cook! Casseroles, mac and cheese, curries, chilli etc then just bung a jacket potato in the micro or a few rice sachets all super easy to make.

Rubyinthedust81 · 12/05/2024 19:22

Sorry for your loss, roast a big chicken on Sunday - easy to chuck in oven and leave.
keep leftovers slice and use for stir fry one day and fajitas the next. Thai curry paste with coconut milk for another. Etc
You can keep ( I have ) cooked chicken for up to five days in fridge if temp is below 4 c and you throughly reheat.
Air fryer grilled fish and vegetables. Takeaways have a lot of fat and salt - no good in long run. Good health starts with freshly cooked food.

Jpatters · 12/05/2024 19:27

Beans are great - grab a few tins of plain beans (we use butter beans, haricot beans or cannellini beans usually). Grab some jars of sauce like tomato & basil, pesto etc. heat the beans in the sauce and dip in toasted bread or eat on toast. Can add things like feta cheese crumbled in or cheddar grated on top. I usually sprinkle pine nuts on top too. Alternatively, chop loads of veg like courgette, pepper, tomatoes, aubergine garlic etc & fry it all in olive oil for a bit. Tip in your plain beans with their juice and add things like olives & sundried tomatoes, balsamic vinegar, tomato pure etc and let it cook down a bit. You can add a bit of stock if you want more liquid. We have with browned off halloumi on the side or feta crumbled in with toasted sourdough or baguettes for dipping. It’s easy and relatively cheap as you can get all the flavorful stuff out of jars then you just need veg, beans & bread.
you could also do things like tuna Pasta, Pizza pasta (pepperoni and tomato pasta sauce and mozzarella) or tinned mackerel with rice, mayo and peas (much nicer than it sounds!!). We rely a lot on store cupboard type food as it’s much easier to throw together.

gingerninja · 12/05/2024 19:29

Wonder if house keepers exist still….sounds like the sort of thing it’d be great to pay someone to do while you get yourself into a cooking groove. Even just for a couple of hours a week. Just a thought

hby9628 · 12/05/2024 19:31

I'm a lazy cook & use the slow cooker a lot. My top tip is frozen veg. Honestly so easy...chicken, jar of sauce, frozen onion, mixed frozen veg. Chuck it all in & leave it. Packets of microwave rice.
I take the same approach with chilli/spag Bol. Sometimes I just buy the prepared chopped veg & use that with chicken, stock and make it in to a soup.

crowisland · 12/05/2024 19:31

My heart goes out to you. Everything tastes better cooked outside on a grill. (Gas MUCH easier than charcoal)
just buy salmon steaks, chicken breasts, mince for burgers, etc, fresh veggies (peppers, courgette, onions…and paint with olive oil and bung them in the grill. Voila. The more you do it, the more you will want to experiment and extend the repertoire

lackofvitamindd · 12/05/2024 19:33

I'll caveat this by saying these aren't the healthiest but are better than take away and quick/ easy. These are my daughter's favourites (she's. 7)

Hot dogs
Cheapy pizza
Tuna pasta with cheese on top
Jacket (microwave 10mins the 15 in the air fryer) with beans

Quick easy and pretty cheap xx

ColdWaterDipper · 12/05/2024 19:35

I would start by designating certain nights as ‘eat at home’ nights, rather than trying to completely cut out the takeaways immediately. So say, Mondays and Fridays are still takeaways for now, but Tues, weds and Thurs you will cook at home. Then think of 3 very quick easy meals, even if they are freezer foods that you just bung in the oven, and make sure you know which one you are doing which night. So for example: Tuesday is chicken goujons, brown rice from microwave packets, and broccoli (with gravy if you like it); weds is veggie omelettes; and Thurs is frozen pizzas with garlic bread and salad. That way you get into the swing of cooking a bit without it being overwhelming. Other super easy things are beans on toast, jacket potatoes, stirfry from those kits in the supermarket, all day breakfast, sausage and mash etc.

Presumably you cook at the weekends already? Or if not, maybe use the weekend to try and cook something slightly more ambitious like a chilli or bolognese and then have it both nights so that you cook it on sat but do double the amount so you just reheat it on Sunday.

I do all the cooking at home so when I go away for work my husband really struggles with that aspect of home life, along with work and looking after the kids. I leave him easy to cook stuff for him and the children or they have batch cooked things from the freezer, or beans on toast. We very rarely have takeaways just because we don’t have the cash for that and also we live in the middle of nowhere so we’d have to drive 20 mins at least to pick one up and 20 mins back home again.

Be kind to yourself, you are still newly widowed and you have little children xxx

pineapplesundae · 12/05/2024 19:35

Ask mom to come once a month to batch cook and freeze for you, then ask mil to come once a month and batch cook and freeze!

Lovetoplan · 12/05/2024 19:37

Kids can be very hungry just out of school so why not make up a few sandwiches in the morning that they can eat when you pick up in the car. Better still make up sandwich bags at the weekend and freeze taking out one/two each day. Dried onions are useful for making up bolognese and curries.

Holibob24 · 12/05/2024 19:40

Please try to keep away from take aways. I was like you and it sent my cholesterol levels through the roof.
I work 2 jobs. I support a couple elderly people. Plus being a taxi for my son’s social life. Between 7pm and 10pm before I get home.
I very much agree with others on try do a slow cooker meal. It will make you feel soo much better and healthier.
sorry for your loss. You will get there eventually. Don’t stress about it.

Polishedshoesalways · 12/05/2024 19:40

I hate cooking op but I can do this in under 10 minutes mid week:

Fresh pre cut and washed vegetables fry with udon noodles, chuck in honey, soya sauce and use garlic oil, add your favourite protein. Make up extra for tomorrow. Put in fridge.

Following day warm up noodles. Pop salmon or grilled chicken on the top add sesame seeds

Rice with dips, veggies, wraps and avocado

Pasta with 2 min blended veggie sauce or fresh ready made, vegetables and choice of protein

Yoghurt and fruit for dessert.
Fresh juice
Multivitamins every day

takeaway sushi every Friday

You are managing brilliantly op

stepmad · 12/05/2024 19:47

Sorry for your loss could you afford to pay some one part time for four hours a week they could batch cok for you

Lucy377 · 12/05/2024 19:48

Have you an Air fryer?
Makes things very easy. For example sausage and mash, do sausages in air fryer while you defrost mash.

To be honest I would think you are still suffering grief so you probably feel like you are 'not up to' cooking dinners at the minute which would be normal. Give yourself time.

Greengagesnfennel · 12/05/2024 19:58

If you want to save money then I recommend a supermarket dinner on way home. If you can find one with a cafe still open they are child friendly, reasonably balanced nutritional and a lot cheaper than restaurant & posh takeaway options.
Also jacket with something is your friend. Put potato in oven night before for 1h switch off b4 bed and leave in oven. When you get home cook baked beans reheat potato in MW and add cheese and small kids think you are Marcus a wareing. Much preferred by dc than something more complicated. Add sliced cucumber, carrots & tomato and no guilt.

Greengagesnfennel · 12/05/2024 20:00

And there is something nice about supermarket dinner at a table out rather than eating in the car. A memory of ‘what we did’ when we never otherwise seemed to have enough time to stop and talk.