Why do people swear sooo much and why does it bother me?

[lightsandtunnels]

Obviously no one can say why something bothers another person but bear with me for this one!
Today DH and I went out to a lovely country pub for a drink after work and sat by a beautiful quiet river in the sunshine. Two tables were close to us. One with two guys around early 30s. Talking to each other and using fing (variations of) as a constant adjective, verb or whatever in their conversation. The other table was a smaller group of men and women age between early 40s and late 60s I'd say. They were worse. Talking loudly but just general conversation with each other, not arguments or anything but fing constantly being used again and again as an adjective, exclamation, verb or whatever.

This really really bothered me! I hate hearing language like this and so audibly. I find it offensive and rude and at best it's just lazy. We actually left earlier than we had planned to and I had to stop myself from saying something to both groups (for those of you about to tell me I should just leave the situation.) I don't really know why it bothers me so much as it's just a word and I tried to have an internal dialogue with myself to just chill but I found it really horrible to hear. I've had this several times usually in pubs or restaurants and I hate it.

fwiw I do swear myself, in certain situations, like being scared suddenly or annoyed but not in general conversation in public.

Is it just me? AIBU?

YABU - get a f*king grip lights it's perfectly fine
YANBU - I hate it too

I completely agree with you (and many others) OP. there's just no need.

I'm not offended by someone swearing when they stub their toe / kneel on the lego / tread on a piece of glass, or if they are really angry about a perceived injustice. It is the inability to complete a sentence without one (or several) profanities. I mean, why do it ? It just takes away the point of using words like that.

Maybe she's a mumsnetter on the quiet - I've definitely said it before on 'People who swear are stupid' threads!

I swear so so much. It is just ingrained in my language and I really do struggle to not do it.

It's also ironic really to post moaning about swearing on MN

One of the most sweary, uncensored places online 🤣

When I was a young woman I swore a lot. My exh did not like it and asked me not to do it, so I tried to minimize it and currently I do it very little (or at least that is what I think 🤣). I do think that is very much a cultural thing. I come from an Eastern European country and people there swear so much my ears start to tingle when I visit. I currently live on another continent rarely ever hear people swear and its mostly young people.

In your opinion.

But lots of people who are lovely swear. And lots of people who are horrid don't.

I’m fluent in another language, in addition to English. In the second language especially, commonly used profanities and vulgarities are words and phrases that are really aggressive towards, and derogatory of women. I always feel grossed out and stressed out when I hear them bandied about regularly in conversation.

I’d suggest parents who think it’s ok to hit their children “for punishment” are

a) the ones that were not brought up correctly
b) not in a position to pass judgement on others

tbh.

I'd definitely have preferred being sworn at to being punched in the side of the head (no bruises that way) - maybe if she'd sworn occasionally, she'd have got the minor irritations and annoyances out of her system before the rage came out all at once directly at me.