To think going to the pub 'for one' doesn't mean returning home 4 hours later?

[Orangepuffpastry]

The Mrs regularly finishes work early on Friday at 3, and goes to the pub with work mates. I have no problem with this - she works hard and deserves a social life.

This week, let's just say I could've really used her help with the kids at home after school. Before setting off for work, she assures me she's just going 'for one' after work and will be home to help.

She gets in just before 9, to an irate husband. She swears blind that 'going for one' means "just one alcoholic drink and then a few soft drinks after, it doesn't mean I'll be home early". I've told her she's a cheeky cow, and she should just fess up that she forgot about our agreement, and in this instance couldn't give a shit about being home early.

AIBU?

9pm, and on a Friday after work? Doesn’t sound unreasonable to me unless there is a drip feed on its way or this is happening daily…Have you really never been out for one drink and then got chatting/ enjoyed yourself and decided to stay for a bit longer? Obviously you should get a chance to do this too but give her a break FGS!

For me “one” means actually what she said, maybe one or max two alcoholic drinks but then maybe a coke, some crisps/ chips and a bit of a chat. We tend to leave the office about 5.30/ 6, so a couple of drinks and a chat will easily take me to 8. Then getting home probably about 40 min. So yes I could easily not be home until 9. But importantly I won’t be pissed or have a hangover the next day.

Of course YNBU, you’re getting some very strange responses here 🤔. If my OH said he was going out for one drink after work I’d expect him to be an extra hour or 2. I wouldn’t be happy either, not that I don’t want him to go out but don’t say you’re going for one drink and come home 6 hours later that’s taking the piss.

I can only assume people either haven’t read the thread properly or are being oddly contrary.

OP clearly said that they don’t mind in general and it’s a frequent occurrence.

This particular time they asked if DW could come back. DW said she’s just going for one and then came back after 9.00

In theory my DH can go to the pub when we he likes but he always checks it’s ok.

If I said ‘would you mind coming back by 7? I’m feeling ill/tired/overwhelmed/am going out at 8.30’ he’d say ‘sure’ and be back. As would I.

Yeah, right

So he’s lying? It sounds like normally it’s well after 9, but she returned at 9 this time thinking she was doing him a favour, because he’d asked. If my dh went out to the pub every Friday at 3 til chucking out time, I’d be pretty pissed off.

Where are people getting the idea that if this were a woman writing, responses would be different? Not that many women would be complaining if their DHs came home from the pub by 9.....

I've seen threads on here where husbands have gone out 'for a quick pint' at 4pm and not been home by 5am. The OP is worried sick because she's heard nothing from him since e.g. 10pm when he was getting a taxi, and she's been told she's being controlling by trying to contact him, and no reasonable person expects to be updated by text if partner is not coming home!

I am giving my take on the situation. You clearly disagree. So be it.

Agreed

On the fence

Going for one means I intend to go for one but we may end up putting the world to rights so might have a couple more. However of this happens I will message you to let you know