About Friends wedding

[Scottishdreams1991]

Friend is getting married overseas next year which will be a childfree wedding. All good. Since it will be expensive and ultimately take our hoilday fund away. Dh and our 3 dc will come to so we can also have a hoilday. completes different hotel and roughly 20 -30 mins away from wedding. The plan was i would go to wedding etc while dh and dc do something else for the day.

Friend has told me that its not OK.
im i missing something here?

Your friend is a dick. The only response to her is “Oh sorry, I hadn’t realised you’d booked exclusive use of the whole freaking Country”.

OK well you're not expected to spend your holiday funds on a guess by anybody, if they respect you. She needs to tell you what's going on, clearly, or expect your rejection.

"OK bridezilla, that's a shame. So sorry I won't be able to make it. All the best."*

*Proceed to book holiday with family to the same destination and plaster the news all over Facebook.

Weirdo.

What is the reason

She honestly didn't give a reason. haven't heard from her in a few days. This is why i hate wedding so much stress for everyone involved

She doesn't get to dictate to you about where your family go on holiday end of

Was the original plan for you to stay at a designated hotel? Or are there other events either side of the wedding she wanted everyone to attend?

Or she may just be raging that her wedding’s now a side note to your holiday and not the main event??? Some brides rally love that spotlight!

Well OP surely she has to specify 'what ' isn't OK?
Staying at a different hotel?
Going alone without your DH?

When she said it wasn’t ok- what part?

I don't see anything wrong with this. In fact I'm planning similar in a few months. DH has a friend's wedding in their home country which is also a lovely tourist destination.
DH only has a +1, we intend to go as a four, stay at a different hotel, DH attend alone, then carry on our holiday.

I agree with others, she really needs to specify what exactly is not OK. But I actually can't think what she might possibly respond that would make it OK for her to try to dictate this to you.

I'd just do it anyway. She's never going to see them. Won't impede on you being there so there's no issue.

If she was paying for you to be there then I might understand a bit but again she won't see them.

She's lost the plot

So when she said it's not ok and you asked why what did age say?

I'd have the family holiday and fuck the wedding.

Well then it can't possibly not be ok then

Bridezilla doesn't get a say in your family holiday. After her display of immaturity I would skip the holiday and go on holiday with dh and dc wherever you wish.

What the hell has it got to do with her! Sounds like a perfect solution and actually a really nice one on your families part, to organise your entire family holiday around her wedding!
Why are some people so weird.

Weddings really aren’t stressful as long as the bride (and possibly groom) aren’t being a twat.

I think you sound really lovely to plan your holiday around a single invite to her wedding. If it were me, with her response, I wouldn't go and would ensure my own family holiday returned the day she flies out for her wedding to swerve the whole thing.

Oh just decline the invite!

She's totally unreasonable

You are being MORE than generous by planning this for her in the first place, it doesnt matter if she doesnt think its "ok" as she doesnt get a fcking say in it. The world doesnt revolve around her.

Good grief, the cheek of some people. I'd tell her to stuff her stupid wedding and go somewhere abroad that we all wanted to go.

Dear friend. I'm not clear on what your objections are to my DH and DC coming over to holiday nearby as they would not be attending your wedding. However, it is clearly something you feel strongly about and we will abide by your wishes. None of us will now be attending. Have a lovely day.

I always see it this way; it’s an invitation not a summons. You aren’t obligated to go just because you are invited. If you’ve tried to find a compromise which means you aren’t sacrificing all your family’s yearly holiday time for the sake of a day and she’s rejected it, don’t go then? It’s not like you were bringing them anywhere near her wedding - they’re just in the same country? Bizarre.

Surely people realise when they pick these destination weddings that most people won’t/ can’t attend. Especially those with families and even more so during a bit of an unstable financial time for everyone.

Probably that all your attention won't be on her 😝 and you might want to leave early to see your family.

She's ridiculous and I would be politely declining the invitation and just enjoying my family holiday.