Humiliated by John Lewis staff

[FTMaz]

Hi
okay so I know this will seem very trivial to some but it is playing on my mind because I think I am a very reasonable and polite person and feel I was humiliated for absolutely no reason.

so I bought a jumper from a John Lewis store (Sweaty Beaty brand). The jumper was in the sale for £65. I wore it once and washed it according to the instructions. I put it on yesterday and my Mum commented that it had faded, the jumper is beige but I noticed it had a big white patch where the colour had seemingly ran out of it on the front. As I know John Lewis is known for their customer service I decided I would take it to the store to see if they would offer an exchange, I still had the receipt showing it had been purchased recently.

I went to the womenswear till but the queue was massive (I had my 12 week old baby with me) so I went to a till near the shoes. The girl serving must have been about 17/18. I explained to her what had happened and said I wasn’t sure if I could swap it but thought it was worth an ask. The girl was very polite but said she needed to check with a colleague, fine not a problem. She returned with a colleague who didn’t even acknowledge me. At this point there was a now a queue at the till. They both turned away from me and girl number 2 started whispering and inspecting the jumper. This probably went on for about 10 minutes. Girl number 1 then turned back to me and said something to the effect of I’m really sorry but I need to check with a manager…I assumed girl 2 was a manager but again I said okay. She then called someone on the phone. I continued to wait and at this point my baby started to cry, girl number 1 obviously feeling uncomfortable called again and apologised, again fine as not her fault that baby is crying or that manager is taking a long time. So eventually the manager turns up and calls me ‘sweetheart’ okay a term of endearment but I am a 34 year old professional so odd of her to do. Anyway…she inspects the jumper and says she can’t see the white patch, I said to her I couldn’t either until I went into natural light and my Mum pointed it out. At this point I am starting to feel agitated and embarrassed as there is a queue, my baby is crying and I am basically being told I’m making things up so I say ‘don’t worry about it for the sake of £60 I’ll just have the jumper back,’ she then says to go with her outside the store to natural light to show her the patch…seriously? I reply no it’s fine I’m not dragging my baby outside I’ll just have the jumper back. Again she insists I go outside with her and I again say it’s fine I’ll have the jumper back. She then turns to girl number 1 and says ‘you’ll come with me outside to look won’t you’ so they both then walk off and leave me at the till with my now screaming baby. Sometime later they return with ANOTHER member of staff, so now 4 people have looked at this bloody jumper! The manager says they all agree there is nothing wrong with it. Now I am quite frankly pissed off and humiliated and say ‘ I told you I would take the jumper back but instead I have been standing here whilst 4 people inspect it, I didn’t demand a refund I simply asked if it was possible to do anything such as an exchange.’ She replies there’s nothing wrong with it. So I say (probably wrongly so but I’d had enough) ‘if you go on my account you will see how much money I spend in this store, do you seriously think I would make things up to get back £60?’ She replies again there is nothing wrong with it.

for context I worked in retail for years both before starting university, during and after (the irony is I actually also worked in that John Lewis 😂) I get that it can sometimes be shit and people are rude but I was honestly lovely and feel I was humiliated and spoken to like an idiot.

However I am also overly tired from the sleepless nights….so AIBU to wait to complain to the store?

I don't have a mobility scooter – I was being sarcastic in response to you saying I'm not walking age. I'm in my 20s, fit and healthy and I walk just fine. I really don't think it takes just 5 mins.

Point is, people can't be expected to notice everything. She should have spoken up if she wanted help.

She didn't make a decision. She called in two other people and then faffed around insisting on taking it outside when OP herself had made the decision to take it back.

I would have given the refund because the item was faulty. But if the manager really couldn't see the fault and didn't believe the customer or staff member who saw the fault, then she could have said, no, sorry, I can't give a discount, here are your next steps. It would have taken 5 minutes tops and no stress.

Maybe that approach stopped working for them, so they decided to change it? Maybe the percentage of unreasonable customers increased?

There is a big online retailer in the country where I previously lived. When they first started out they also had a very generous no questions asked returns policy.

That resulted in people shamelessly taking the piss, like a colleague of mine who ordered a dress and a pair of shoes, wore them to an event and then sent them back for full refund.

The retailer was well known for their returns policy, so my colleague wasn’t an exception. Quite a few people tried it on, quite possibly more than just 1%.

Eventually the company changed their policy and became much stricter, and who can blame them.

OP expected preferential treatment because she thought she waited too long and had a crying baby there.

As a pp said retail is going through a hellish time right now with lots of shops closing so it’s stressful for stores and staff.

Talk about exaggerating what the OP described!

Seriously?! If you had any credibility at all, you’ve lost it with that nonsense.

The immediate stress of a crying baby on the Mum, in what seems like an OTT And over staffed interaction with a customer, is not really comparable to the broader considerations of store closures, of its Westfield, I doubt it is going to close anytime soon.

I didn’t say you weren’t walking age… jeez.

I don’t think it takes 5 mins either it prob takes 10 mins or so in that store to go outside depending on how busy the inside escalators in Westfield are and where in John Lewis you are. If you really want that refund in that scenario you’ll go outside.

OP didn’t want to do that though.

If you’re that bothered use a department store with easy access out, but most ladies wear and customer returns are on the upper or medium floor levels so to go outside you’d have to use lifts or escalators. There’s only one John Lewis with ladies wear I know that’s a 5 min journey outside and that’s in Kingston upon Thames.

I just would of preferred a normal ‘hello’

Do you think there was something about the way you were presenting — possibly a bit distracted (who wouldn't be with a small baby) and with a jumper with a strange white mark no one there could see — affected the way they spoke to you? Perhaps the manager called you sweetheart because you had been described to her as a stressed, possibly distressed, customer?

It may have been misjudged but I wonder whether she chose 'sweetheart' as a way of indicating empathy. Just a thought.

I also think you can't expect help for everything and do have to ask ie the supermarket scenario. I too am 5ft2 and OFTEN have to ask for help when things are on a high shelf. If you are just stood there looking, people don't automatically assume you need something passed down .... you could be reading the info on the price tag. If you are stood there looking around at people, they maybe assume you are waiting for someone. It only takes a minute to say "excuse me can you pass me X , thank you".

And as for your examples of "I was raised to offer help ie elderly or disabled". Of course people are much more likely to take note of a situation of where somebody vulnerable needs assistance and be more automatic in offering help, not just someone who can't reach a box of cereal from a shelf. :)

Well, we don't know what wording was used but presumably it was along the lines of 'sorry no, I can't see anything and neither can my colleagues [so won't be able to accept it back]. If it was definitely visible in natural light, I'm happy to have a look in natural light [and review]'. Sounds like several staff were involved as the first was very junior, then the rest were trying to see this mark, as in not dismiss the OP offhand.

Perhaps the tussle was the natural light bit and she should just have handed it straight back over and said 'suit yourself' but it sounds like she wanted to try and resolve it

I agree. It sounds like they genuinely couldn’t see a white patch and weren’t sure what to do, but we’re going out of their way to try and see it😂

Hugs though op - I remember feeling fragile over things like this when I had babies and I tended to ruminate over things too much. You may have more luck with sweaty Betty as a pp suggested.

Westfield is a business, John Lewis is one of its stores. If Westfield have decided to delay opening by a few years in my local town (Croydon) this is usually for a few reasons, economic etc.

I really don’t think this interaction was overstaffed or OTT. Maybe the first person she approached could’ve found a manager to assist OP quicker but with this top, ultimately it was a colour issue which needed to be seen in daylight and the store’s lighting couldn’t show it properly.

I’ve worked in retail when younger too and the amount of customers who’d return things which were obviously worn were unbelievable. I don’t say the OP has done this but it’s their T&C and Sweaty Betty either comes under that refund strand or under John Lewis’ strand. If it’s faded with one wash then it shows bad quality or something with Sweaty Betty so JL would have to return it to them as it couldn’t be resold there if it was faulty.

I really don’t see issues with that, it’s good business by JL.

If you were standing there for that long, why didn't you just stick your crying baby on the breast to calm him/her down?

Oh of course, she's really going to want to do that in the middle of the shop with a queue behind her... 🙄

It's not that outlandish a suggestion. It's what I would have done. Nobody's suggesting it's optimum feeding conditions but it isn't that bizarre.

Obviously, you had a genuine complaint but the problem is that so many people will try and return something after wearing it because it’s “faulty” that they’ve closed the floodgates. They will ask questions now because they’ve lost so much money.

When I worked in a clothes shop people would routinely return clothing covered in deodorant, make up, fake tan, crumbs and body fluids and swear they’d never taken them out of the bag.

The best one was the return of a wedding dress because “I’m never going to wear it again.”

This is very true. I have no problem asking for assistance but if I’m shopping I’m usually in my own little world not taking notice of minor incidences around me.

It was nappies….i had a pram. Read before you comment.

Oh nothing. My idea of helping others extends much, much further than giving up seats on the bus and lifting down items from (mid height) shelves- in addition to that of course.

I do, and always have done far more than that for others (for work, voluntarily and whenever the need arises).

However, I stand by actually giving people the chance to help you, and making your requirements known before bollocking on about the lack of values in society nowadays etc etc.

Clearly you have much more confidence than me because I would not feel comfortable unzipping my top, getting my boob out and getting my baby latched whilst standing up in a queue of people. But congratulation to you for your superb mothering abilities.

Don't be silly. It doesn't make me in any way superior to you and I haven't suggested it does. If that's your take on my suggestion that's on you.

I generally went for the one up, one under layering of clothes and never had to get a boob out. Nothing special about that.

I would not have had the confidence to that in front of a queue of people and yes, I did breastfeed my DC, second until 2! They probably would have got a fifth member of staff to get a chair sorted for the feeding and made more of a drama!

Fair enough. I wouldn't consider being in a queue to be in front of anyone except the people I was already talking to. Anyone else in the queue would be behind me and if they noticed anything it would only be the sudden reduction in crying noise rather than anything else!

Interesting that you describe any further potential help from the staff as “more drama!”.

Hi
I won’t be replying to anymore comments on this thread. Mainly because it is so long people are asking questions that have already been answered.

Thanks to those who have given their opinion in a polite and well meaning way. To those who felt the need to be rude or nasty I hope that you feel better after deciding to direct it towards a stranger online.

interesting to read people’s different perspectives on the situation and also how people add or assume things that didn’t happen in order to further their own argument. It’s been like a social experiment 😂

please continue to discuss with other users if wanted.