Hi I just wanted to post on here as I'm kind of lonely and feeling gutted as my divorce is nearly through. My husband went off with someone else nearly 20 months ago, we had been together as a couple for nearly 22 years. He left his son and me for someone else and her 4 children and grandbaby. He doesn't see much of his own son and I know it upsets my son as he's mentioned it when drunk, however I doubt he's going to change and there isn't much I can do about it. My main problem is I still feel utterly heartbroken and I know I'm being stupid as he's been gone ages, I'm very depressed/down most days. Our divorce should be finalised by the end of May and I don't want to be divorced even though it was myself who filed for it(a bit of control I had left) My son has just started going out and enjoying his life,in the past year he has a little job walking distance and all his mates are nearby. He has lived here all his life and I know he doesn't want to move, the separation wasn't easy for either of us. I can see my MIL house from my house and my SIL too. I saw my MIL everyday for the last 16 years but obviously blood is thicker than water and they chose not to speak to me, they told my son I was lying and his ad didn't have someone else and tries to make me look like I was a liar. This is one of the reasons why I don't understand why I still feel so upset about him leaving and my upcoming divorce. I still love him yet I know I should hate him for lying and hurting me. It's been nearly twp years and I'm bloody upset and annoyed at myself every day.