To think most people don’t seem happy these days

[Babyitaintovertilitsover]

Just genuinely happy, like lots used to be

I feel like most people I know are not truly happy, they can laugh or smile at times, but something just isn’t right…am I imagining this? I don’t remember it being like that pre covid

I agree with this. I think it's the stage of life. I'm in my 40s and now know so many people who have died, are in the process of divorce or a midlife crisis, having to care for elderly parents in addition to young kids etc When we were in our 20s/30s we were much more carefree.

I think it's more to do with that than the current socio political climate. There have always been recessions and wars going on.

There have always been recessions and wars- but think back over the last century- can you remember a time when it’s been so relentlessly shit, without a positive shift?

Since 9/11 we’ve had the economic crash, recession and austerity, the toxic Brexit vote, Covid with its vast fallout, 2 wars with British boots on the ground (Afghanistan & Iraq) along with others that have really threatened to spill over. All set against the backdrop of the climate emergency, and a conservative government that has decimated public services and allowed the housing market to run unchecked, to a point where the great conservative dream of home ownership for “all” is now predicated on inheriting or being given a substantial hand up.

And in all that time, we haven’t seen a period of sustained economic or social recovery and growth/rebuilding.

it’s been, frankly, a shocking start to the millennium.

The difference now for people in this stage is that housing (and life in general) is so expensive, it’s harder to afford to split from an ex. It’s harder to access the drugs we need to support health, be it menopause meds or others due to the Brexit shortages. If you’re managing elderly parents, you’re also likely to be attempting to navigate broken health and social care systems.

It’s harder to access the drugs we need to support health, be it menopause meds or others due to the Brexit shortages

I'm not sure I agree with this. When my mum went through the menopause in the late 90s there were no meds to help her at all, menopause wasn't even talked about by anyone, let alone GPs. There was a hysteria about HRT causing cancer (now we know that study was flawed) and it was frowned upon by medical professionals. She had no support whatsoever and there was no internet to read up on it either, she felt very alone.

I was just speaking to a friend the other day and we agreed that everything just feels 'flat'. I have a great life, no money worries, healthy etc, so if I'm noticing it then I really feel for those less fortunate than me. I think it's a mixture of Brexit, Covid, COL, doom and gloom politics and the weather. There just seems to be little joy and feel good stories atm.

A few people have mentioned the positivity surrounding the 2012 Olympics - really? I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one remembering the hospital beds with nurses dancing around as death hovered above them. A caricature of Boris in a bed ... ring a bell? If you've forgotten, go watch it on YouTube, you'll be shocked if you haven't already tied up connections with what started to happen March 2020. I'll say no more on that subject as the sheer amount of millions still hiding their heads in the sand is staggering.

We've had constant rain for the past 7 months (planes flying over backwards & forwards ✈️) and now surprise surpise they're talking about farmers crops failing ... food shortages. Anyone out there used to play dot to dot? Time to join the dots maybe. Constant rain, no sunlight (no coincidence) and without sunlight and vitamin D, a low mood in the general population is a certainty.

They've engineered inflation, terrified those susceptible with climate change fears, increased mortgage rates and rents to unsustainable levels. But people have to live somewhere, so have to find the money. Some have taken on 2nd and even 3rd jobs. I for one am only surprised it's not 100% of the population feeling devastatingly depressed and at the end of their tether, great efforts have been made to ensure that.

Teaching strange things to your children in school, finding out people in the govt. and the media are not what or who you thought they were.

Tesco, British Gas (to name just a few) making millions and millions in profit, incentives to stop farming were offered to farmers. Twenty mile an hour speed limits, Car insurance & petrol costs spiralling. LED lights blinding drivers whilst night driving, the streets being unsafe whilst the police presence seems to have disappeared (unless you don't pay your council tax of course and they appear to back-up bailiffs) or you make the wrong comment on the new Twitter. Pot holes everywhere.

And people wonder why the majority are feeling anxious and depressed. I'd say that's a step in the right direction. Maybe when the rest who are blindly not seeing all this finally do and they get depressed, that's when things will change because the people will decide that it's time to,change it all xx

Sorry but you seem to saying that planes are making it rain by something other than their impact on climate change ?

I love a giggle in the morning

I agree with this. So much negativity and moaning. So many people with a 'fuck everybody else' attitude. I really should spend far less time on here because I do think it probably brings me down.

Because a lot of people's lives are much harder than 10 years ago.

If you have waited a year for a consultants appointment for a chronic health issue, if you are fighting to get your SEND kid support in school or you are struggling to make your food budget last the month, then life doesn't feel like a picnic....

The 20th century was pretty big on stressful times. Then the 21st century started off with 9/11. We had 7/7 just after we were awarded the Olympics. That led to fear and uncertainty and suspicion. Then we had the economic crash of 2008 which led to damage still reverberating ( imo). Then, in 2011, we had the killing of Mark Duggan, which led to mass riots all over the country. Next year was the Olympics and that didn't start off that well, with lots of people down on the idea (cost etc) and G4 security issues, armed forces having to fill seats on the first few days. Although it picked up.

Then all the rest!

Also, what are we comparing it to? Our own youth and childhood? Or how we imagined other people felt in the past. Often looked back on with rose tinted glasses: "we were poor, had nothing, but were happy!" Or from films, tv and books that show all the nice bits and frequently have a happy ending?

Overall, I think it's impossible to judge or compare accurately.

I think 2020/2021 emotionally exhausted too many people at once. In my case restrictions controlled most of my external social contact flipping my life on and off overnight. By January 2021 I was in a depression and existing my days away. By the spring as life slowly crept open again, the expanse of flat emotion continued. There were several big threads filled with people feeling the same, where the joy of life just hadn't pinged back. I spent 2020 fighting, made the most of what I could in the summer and that 12 hours notice that schools were closing again cracked something inside me.

It's not the only factor, but 2022 was not a year for healing with a flurry of funerals then children having health issues. Life was still erratic and unpredictable.

Many of my friends are in public services so they had the opposite time of being overworked and burned out and really it was 2023 before any of us had the social energy to emerge from the fug of survival mode. They've had their own issues too. At one point due to a friend's life-shit it took 3 weeks to be able to tell them about my family member's death because they weren't in a position to hear about my life-crap and their situation needed more action at that moment. Previously there seemed to be enough ups that someone could give more to someone else's down, whereas we all ended up down together.

Then there's the economy which has been various grades of shit for 15 years which is unusually long. Optomism was growing by 2019 but 2020 kicked that back for years.

Politics is depressing. I can't see any clear, realistic visions of life improving under any political direction at present. Politics and the economy isn't a uniquely British issue and many countries are having similar phases.

I shut the wars out. I hear news headlines, and read the odd thing of interest, but can't be doing with perma-crisis mode and 24hr reporting. The news is pretty monotonous, and I've been around long enough to see various cycles of war. News reporting used to be more factual.

My hormones are probably involved. I notice monthly patterns in my emotional state in recent years. I'm also prone to SAD and have had too few sunny bursts of energy in the past year.

Objectively my life is decent, I know and appreciate what I have, but somehow I lost a glow in recent years and am struggling to find that again and it's not for the want of trying. I miss it.

Mental health problems across the population have risen hugely in the last 5-10 years, so yes, of course, we will all start to notice this.

It doesn't mean you can't be happy or no one is happy. But I think in the current climate it is harder for people to find/ create good lives for themselves than it used to be.