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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Ex's share

30 replies

MIGreedy · 28/04/2024 15:26

My ex for 30 years name is on an investment that I bought with my own money. We each had our own investments and shared investments during our not too long marriage. This was overlooked during a very amicable separation. I've never needed the money and was waiting to see who died first. Now I want to build a barn and the investment is now at an all time high at over $40,000. I'm thinking of offering her $5,000 to sign off. AIBU?

OP posts:
TheAirRunningOut · 28/04/2024 15:29

If it was an asset of the marriage and both of your names are on it then surely it should be 50:50

saere · 28/04/2024 15:29

If it's in her name isn't it her money?!

jeaux90 · 28/04/2024 15:31

You have been divorced 30 years and now expecting the asset that she legally owns?

I mean mate, she's not exactly going to roll over and say yes unless she really doesn't need the money.

chaticat · 28/04/2024 15:32

I've never needed the money and was waiting to see who died first. is this a reverse?

MrsElijahMikaelson1 · 28/04/2024 15:33

You can offer; she can and probably will say no thanks-I will have my 50%

chaticat · 28/04/2024 15:41

MrsElijahMikaelson1 · 28/04/2024 15:33

You can offer; she can and probably will say no thanks-I will have my 50%

Hopefully

BiIIIie · 28/04/2024 16:27

50/50

Rosestulips · 28/04/2024 16:29

You are offering her 5000 to get an investment of 40000?

Am I not getting something here?

ICanFixHim · 28/04/2024 16:29

I'd want 50/50 purely because you'd be so cheeky in assuming I'd take such a low amount.

TeaKitten · 28/04/2024 16:31

Is it in both of your names or just hers? I think you should give her 50%, it seems unbelievably childish that you were waiting for one of you to die rather than just splitting the money and moving on.

MIGreedy · 30/04/2024 19:48

Ex and I had our own careers, assets, and incomes. We shared household expenses, bought and sold a house together, and occasionally invested in art and antiques together. She had no involvement in this investment and I'm not sure how or why it has joint ownership. I have no intention of splitting this at anywhere near the 50/50 point.

OP posts:
OrigamiOwls · 30/04/2024 19:50

How did it get overlooked in the divorce proceedings?

neilyoungismyhero · 30/04/2024 19:51

If you've no intention of splitting, it sounds like you'll be relishing the thought of that money until one of you dies.

LordSnot · 30/04/2024 19:52

MIGreedy · 30/04/2024 19:48

Ex and I had our own careers, assets, and incomes. We shared household expenses, bought and sold a house together, and occasionally invested in art and antiques together. She had no involvement in this investment and I'm not sure how or why it has joint ownership. I have no intention of splitting this at anywhere near the 50/50 point.

You put her name on it, Einstein.

chaticat · 30/04/2024 20:01

MIGreedy · 30/04/2024 19:48

Ex and I had our own careers, assets, and incomes. We shared household expenses, bought and sold a house together, and occasionally invested in art and antiques together. She had no involvement in this investment and I'm not sure how or why it has joint ownership. I have no intention of splitting this at anywhere near the 50/50 point.

That's something you should have considered when registering it in both your names

MIGreedy · 30/04/2024 20:24

3 things
1
Neither of us made a declaration of assets. She did a lot of business off the books. The only thing we worked on was her getting a bit of my retirement when I retired, which she is getting.
2
I know I put her name on it but I don't remember what the reasoning was.
3
I don't think I ever relished the thought of this money one way or the other. This discussion we are currently carrying on is the most time I've on the matter in my life.
4th thing
I just stumbled on this forum. Do they usually have these back and forth discussions.
I didn't actually know what the mumsnet site was about. I hope I'm not intruding.

OP posts:
dragonscannotswim · 30/04/2024 20:30

4th thing
I just stumbled on this forum. Do they usually have these back and forth discussions.
I didn't actually know what the mumsnet site was about. I hope I'm not intruding.

😂😂😂😂😂😂

FFS, a forum is FOR back and forth discussions!! Are you mad??

dragonscannotswim · 30/04/2024 20:35

And also

YESUR

kidsandpuppies · 30/04/2024 20:44

Will she not be subject to tax on this investment?

MIGreedy · 30/04/2024 21:07

I'm not sure what the initial investment was, probably 15 or 20 k. So, 20 or 25 k income. I was thinking I'd probably pay the taxes.

OP posts:
Mia85 · 30/04/2024 21:09

Which country are you in (you used $)?

MIGreedy · 30/04/2024 21:11

I have an old tractor that I'm not using and a collector car that I could get close to 40k if I sold them. And, then I wouldn't need a new barn.

OP posts:
kidsandpuppies · 30/04/2024 21:14

You’ll probably pay the tax and give her 5000 of a 40000 investment, how fortunate for her.

quietlifeneeded · 30/04/2024 21:26

my husband recently had something similar happen... him and his now ex wife took out an endowement to cover their mortgage. when they divorced, it was assumed that this endowement had been cancelled. turns out it hadn't and she had continued paying it.

this endowement matured end of last year, she went to claim the whole amount and the insurance company said nope! even though she had been paying the premiums all this time, half of it was in fact her ex husbands.

she claims she never knew, but she had been receiving statements every year in joint names at her new address for 20 plus years.

she had decided to carry on paying, because it carried a life insurance with it, and if my husband passed away, then she got a small fortune!

husband was entitled to 50%... he did however be fair with her, and he worked out a figure based on the amount of time they were married and agreed to just take that.

StormingNorman · 30/04/2024 21:28

OrigamiOwls · 30/04/2024 19:50

How did it get overlooked in the divorce proceedings?

I think overlooked is a euphemism for hidden

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