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Original poster

Please help me choose a house. It's driving me insane..

98 replies

arghdecisions12345 · 26/04/2024 18:31

Please give me some advice… I've never been in this position before…

My partner and I have separated, and I have a two year old child. I'm trying to find a house to buy. I did consider renting for a couple of years while I save up more money to buy a house that I truly want but a lot of advice I've received is just buy anyway for now because it will be more efficient than renting.

I'm really struggling to decide… I have seen a cute very little cottage. It is very very small. It's on a row of cottages in a very tiny quiet country road.
Apparently it is very sought-after and those cottages do not lose money so when I sell it, I could potentially make a little bit of money on it. It's certainly affordable. It's within my budget. But like I say it's small. A little dated. I'd definitely need to update it a bit.

I viewed another house that is £45,000 more than the cottage. It is big and beautiful and I loved the decor throughout the whole house. The only problem is the bedroom for my DC is very tiny. I didn't want her to have a tiny room.
But to be honest, the small bedroom in the cottage is probably the same size. That is also very small.

It might be that neither of these houses are the ones for me, but does anyone have any advice at all?

OP posts:
VioletMountainHare · 26/04/2024 20:31

I’d go for the cottage due to the parking. No driveway would annoy me every time I came home and had to find a space. Plus insurance is higher to park on a street and you run the risk of your car being damaged and the person who caused it driving off. That happened to my relative and her car was written off.

Being able to build a separate office in the garden sounds like a nice option too. Good luck whatever you decide 🍀

Olika · 26/04/2024 20:36

If the smaller bedrooms are so tiny are you sure your DC can grow in them?

Lilacdew · 26/04/2024 20:38

Neither of them sounds quite right. In general, I'd go for a bigger place. Even if the bedroom is small, as she grows older a loft space could be her playroom or teenage den. But I'd never buy on a busy road with a toddler.

Also, not sure about living in a tiny village with a child. You'll be constantly driving - not just to nrusery but all after school clubs, playdates and you'd have to move for her teenage years if you don't want to be a full time taxi.

TargetPractice11 · 26/04/2024 20:38

The small cottage. Your money is safe, you'll have a driveway.

You don't need a lot of room for only two people.

You'll be able to put your stamp on it and it will feel like it's yours.

£45000 less on the mortgage and your money safe in these uncertain times.

Spitalfieldrose · 26/04/2024 20:39

I wouldn’t buy either. My Mum and Dad live in a little row of small cottages as you described and you REALLY have to get on with your neighbours. If you don’t, then life can get awkward very quickly.

I also wouldn’t touch anything on a main road. I live on one and the traffic noise is a PIA in the summer with the windows open, the dirt from traffic is constant and I always worry what it’s doing to our long term health. As it has no parking I definitely wouldn’t, street parking is a nightmare and is subject to the whims of councils.

If you really think you can afford it, look for something in that higher price range. An extra 45k over 25 years isn’t much monthly and may get you something a little better.

SarahAndQuack · 26/04/2024 20:41

You're placing an awful lot of trust on the idea that the cottage will hold its value.

But if they typically come up when someone dies, that suggests mostly they've been inhabited by elderly people - and people who are dying now, grew up with quite different ideas about how much space and modernity is liveable.

It's one thing to say something is picturesque, and quite another to actually, seriously want to live there.

I would not want somewhere where my child barely had room for a single bed, and where I was envisaging needing to build a garden office.

Are these cottages listed or in a conservation area? In both cases, you might find the garden office was out of the running.

sleekcat · 26/04/2024 20:43

Maybe neither of them are right. You don't have a good feeling about the cottage, although just painting it should dramatically transform it. The house doesn't sound very big either if it only has two bedrooms? Regardless, I wouldn't worry too much about a small bedroom, plenty of 3 bedroomed houses have a tiny third bedroom and a child has to sleep in there. Young children, in my experience, aren't fans of playing in their rooms unless they have a friend round.
Would it be annoying having to park around the corner? I'm thinking maybe the cottage due to it being cheaper, but only if you like villages (I don't, so wouldn't buy it).

YourWinter · 26/04/2024 20:43

I wouldn’t choose a house that meant parking away in a side street. No good when you’re unloading small (sleeping?) child/ren, shopping, bags of compost… absolute deal-breaker for me.

IgnoranceNotOk · 26/04/2024 20:44

Neither really - could there be something else that comes up that’s an inbetween with a slightly bigger bedroom?

I do find once you’ve got a driveway it feels like a luxury you don’t want to lose so depends if you have one already that you’d miss?

HoldingOnForAHeron · 26/04/2024 20:47

The cottage. If it doesn't work for you down the line you can always sell it.
Location x3.
The parking is a big plus.

mynamechangemyrules · 26/04/2024 20:48

Things I care about as a single parent;
Parking out front so I don't have to walk with tired children and bags in the dark and rain.
Not living in a rural location because I love being able to 'pop' places.
Living close to school and clubs- again so everything isn't a trek after work.

I chose the cheapest house possible in the best location for us.

Mine have small rooms but set up for them to retreat to, and then a patch of the 'dining room' full of their play stuff.

Location location location as they say!

Lampslights · 26/04/2024 20:49

Cottage for me, not least as no parking and parking in a side street is beyond painful , particularly with a kid.

schloss · 26/04/2024 20:51

Emotive yes but I think a child moving into the cottage is the next part of the cottage's history. Could the cottage be extended at all, even if in the future?

Bigger house but red flags, no parking and boiler in a small bedroom. Yes the boiler can be moved and possibly the rooms rejigged to give more space, but no driveway will may you regret buying it.

If it was 45k less than the cottage due to the parking issue, maybe but to pay 45k more doesn't seem the best option.

Cottage and/or keep looking.

Original poster
arghdecisions12345 · 26/04/2024 20:59

@schloss

It is a lovely thought a child being in the cottage. They're very old and used to be where the local miners lived.

OP posts:
Original poster
arghdecisions12345 · 26/04/2024 21:02

Right now I live on a busy main road .. which I wasn't bothered about when I bought it but now I have a child, I realise how frustrating it is when I can't find a space and I'm parking on the next street.
Coming backwards and forwards with DC and shopping bags. It is very frustrating.
I would be in the same situation if I buy the house that is bigger because I will need to park on another street

OP posts:
Original poster
arghdecisions12345 · 26/04/2024 21:03

And the cottage can't be extended at all. I did wonder if that is possible but it's not at all.

OP posts:
Original poster
arghdecisions12345 · 26/04/2024 21:04

@mynamechangemyrules

Yes, I do currently live on a main road and it is very frustrating, especially in the rain or if I can't find a space and I'm driving round and round looking for somewhere to park knowing that the further I am away the more I need to walk carrying my two year old child. Really annoying at times.

OP posts:
Original poster
arghdecisions12345 · 26/04/2024 21:06

With both houses I can drive to the shops which is around five minutes away.

With the bigger house, there is a corner shop That is a two minute walk away.
Whereas with the cottage, it would be a 3-5 minute drive to the nearest shop.

The bigger house, nursery is a 15 minute drive away. The cottage… The nursery is around 25 minutes away.

OP posts:
schloss · 26/04/2024 21:06

arghdecisions12345 · 26/04/2024 21:03

And the cottage can't be extended at all. I did wonder if that is possible but it's not at all.

That is a shame but not surprised. I personally would rule out the bigger house, even though you thought wow, your comments about lack of parking I think is very important and sensibly is not something to compromise on.

Original poster
arghdecisions12345 · 26/04/2024 21:08

@schloss

I do often struggle thinking of the practicalities. I did that with the house I'm currently in. I definitely thought 'wow' when I viewed my current house because it is so big and very old with all the old features.

But it's on a busy main road with no driveway which I just completely ignored because I love the house so much

OP posts:
schloss · 26/04/2024 21:11

arghdecisions12345 · 26/04/2024 21:08

@schloss

I do often struggle thinking of the practicalities. I did that with the house I'm currently in. I definitely thought 'wow' when I viewed my current house because it is so big and very old with all the old features.

But it's on a busy main road with no driveway which I just completely ignored because I love the house so much

Every house can be made wow, I always think it is part of the joy of a new home, you can make it what you want.

idontlikealdi · 26/04/2024 21:18

I don't think either are right for you.

How long has the cottage been on the market for?

Original poster
arghdecisions12345 · 26/04/2024 21:31

@idontlikealdi

The cottage has been on the market a few weeks.

The bigger house was on the market. Then sold. Then the buyer pulled out due to something on the survey. So it's gone back on the market.

I asked the estate agent what it was on the survey and they said they don't know. Not sure I believe that.

OP posts:
PoppyCherryDog · 26/04/2024 21:32

idontlikealdi · 26/04/2024 21:18

I don't think either are right for you.

How long has the cottage been on the market for?

This. I’d keep looking neither seem right.

The cottage seems too small and the house is on a main road with no parking.

idontlikealdi · 26/04/2024 21:33

It's not that sought after then, if it was it would have been under offer in a weekend.