Stop homeschooling your children.

[pentagonisapentagon]

I run an educational consultancy and exam company. We produce books that most parents in our area of education will purchase. Home educating your children makes us money.

However. STOP. Now I don’t mean those that have children with severe issues (this is a small %, everyone likes to diagnose their children with some form of disorder and it isn’t those I’m talking about) who would benefit out the classroom / often awaiting a better school option.

I mean the parents who are tired with the education system - lots of moans that they can’t take their children for a holiday, annoyed about not being allowed make up, the rules being too hard. You can barely spell, stop trying to teach your children yourself. These children are being FAILED by their parents.

By all means, if you have the relationship, time, ability and means to provide a solid home education system (inc money for tutors which will be needed) - go ahead. Just ensure you’re covering the social aspect.

I am seeing the advice to home school EVERYWHERE. Mumsnet and Facebook filled with the poor advice. It’s detrimental to all parties involved.

I’d love to know others thoughts on this.

I think you mean the ‘unschoolers’ rather than homeschoolers. But I do think regulation is too light on homeschooling in general.

It can work well in the right circumstances. Unfortunately there is a very trendy movement that doesn’t appear to have the first clue how hard it is to cover the curriculum properly.

I agree. A lot of schools dont.

However, there are some family environments are even worse than some school environments sadly. I was thinking of those children. Its incredibly sad.

Home educating and home schooling are two very different things, the latter - a replication of school at home I don't agree with myself.
I home educated, or am home educating mine - my eldest (who came out of school at 10) now has MA in biochemistry from Cambridge. My ds1 (never been to school) had 10 GCSE's level 9 at 14 and now is studying for a levels and AP levels. My last two are younger. I don't use tutors.
Socially they are all popular, confident, skilled and happy. I'll keep home educating thanks.

Work in a school and, believe me, you'll find out...

Completely disagree .

There are two VERY distinct versions of 'home schooling'

The educated, committed (almost always) middle class slightly hippie parents where (almost always) Mum stays home and is the teacher. Accessing resources, planning learning, arranging other home ed socials .. in other words - exactly what home ed should be.

However , In my line of work (the social/civil side of young offender programmes) the new 'Home School' trend is just a really really convenient excuse for already feral children to be completely let down by ineffectual parents and the education system.

Home ed (as pointed out to me by one parent) 'Well it gets the welfare of your back doesn't it' ... along with 'suits me, it means I don't have to get the baby up at stupid o'clock to get DS1 & 2 to school. It's much more chilled, they get up when they wake up. This is from a woman with 5 kids. 3 of which I know to be completely illiterate.

They see it as a way of escaping the checks and balances which are sorely needed with families like this .

I think one of the reasons that HE DC's outcomes compare well with those who attend school might be that until the arrival of covid-19, it was mostly the domain those who were very committed to their strand of the concept and who put it into practice with care and attention.

My take on OP is that she is referring to a different tribe' Those who have a looser idea of how much learning is going on, and probably haven't thought about their approach, whether outside input is needed and if so when/what sort. What's not clear to me is whether such people really exist, or if it's just the latest internet illusion.

If it is real, then it's quite possible that those DC will not reach the levels of those whose parents approached the whole shebang with a different ethos.

I know a wealthy family whose DC were home schooled until secondary with professional teachers, they are all doing well.

I know another family where the mother had been bullied at school herself, who decided after “doing her own research” (which led her to also refuse childhood vaccinations for them) to home educate and “unschool” them. She finally accepted that it wasn’t working just using an app on her phone for an hour a day. The eldest was more than 2 years behind with their reading and the next eldest has been diagnosed with SEN when they finally started school. We are all hoping that they can catch up and that the toddler will go to school at 4

Your point is pointless because the alternative - school - is SHIT. It isn't fit for purpose. There is no way an unqualified TA shoving on a video on is better than a motivated parent. And that's before you take into consideration the bullying/ gender bollocks/ peer pressure and sheer dullness of the daily routine.

🙄

Well that was effective goading.

The reason outcomes of HE children in research are good is that every research study in the UK has been self selecting. So only families with good outcomes take part. The research is meaningless.

I have multiple advance degrees and I couldn't home educate.
Especially for the primary years. I could do Alevel maths and chemistry no problem! But basic reading, spelling, times tables, no. I don't have the patience.
I've only encountered the bad kind of home education. Those that hate school teaching their kids to hate school.

Well, I work in a school and I think you're both talking rubbish.

Far more concerning are the home schoolers who want to keep their children off school so that they can abuse them. Tiny percentage since covid changed things, I am aware, but the lack of checks does mean it stops those children ever becoming independent enough to seek help or feel they can escape.

I think the odd home schooled child who miss spells words is the least of our worries.

For some children it works really well. Others do better in normal schools. Not really any of your business is it?

I have seen excellent HE, but also awful HE.
Too many families either say they are unschooling without knowing what it means. They say their child is learning English from following recipes when baking and maths from counting out change at the shop. It is fine for 5 year olds, but they talk this way with much older children.

The other common approach is to sign kids up to Oak Academy and leave them to self educate.

I think it depends. When my kids were young we went to an art group similar to another mentioned on here that had a lot of home ed kids in it. They were young, and were largely "unschooled" for ideological reasons and had never been in nursery/school. Quite a lot of the parents (some added me on FB etc which is how I know) were anti vaxxers and "Freeman of the land" types. Many of the kids did not wear shoes, or would wear inappropriate clothes (eg princess fancy dress costumes for painting), and "their choice was respected".

I suspect this demographic are very different to those who do it due to lack of SEN provision, bullying etc..

Stop claiming people diagnose their children. Do you have a fucking idea of how long the waiting lists are to get seen, how hard is to get an EHCP to stay in school (I had to appeal with the support of £££ educational lawyers, not everyone has the means though), and what happens to these children while they wait?

Sometimes families just don’t have a choice.

My daughters best friend was de-registered at the beginning of year 10 (the first term they went back properly after lockdown)

Her mum has always been very over protective of her, even now at almost 17 she isn't allowed to go anywhere on her own.

She was 'homeschooled' by her mum through her GCSE's. She had hopes of becoming a marine biologist, but the poor girl failed every one of her exams. She's now in college, resitting the core subjects (after failing again just before xmas) and is taking the only course she was allowed to register for.

I feel so sorry for her, especially now my daughter is starting to look at universities..the gap between them has never been so wide and I feel it will take a lot for this girl to get to where she wants to be, especially with her mum holding her back (there's a lot of emotional blackmail going on)

I do know how hard it is. Doesn’t mean you diagnose them.

You're missing the point. If you don’t have the means to homeschool them or them ability, you shouldn’t be homeschooling them!

Hi OP
just wanted to say I didn’t ‘ love’ diagnosing my child with some thing, their diagnoses broke my heart and they will forever have a different kind of life experience …. Your clearly a rather goady/ nasty person to suggest that people diagnose their children for the sure hell
of it.

You probably do because it is unlikely you can cover the full curriculum (10-12 GCSEs yourself). But if you can, that’s amazing. Well done.

I understand what you mean OP. I have no doubt that the majority of those who homeschool do an excellent job. But there is a minority that do it because they can't be bothered to get up for the school run everyday, don't think that their kids should have to follow the school rules, and are teaching their kids to hate school and "the system". It doesn't do the kids any favours in the long run.

So let’s say you don’t diagnose them. If they can’t cope in school while waiting for an EHCP or a proper diagnosis, what would you do?

Honestly? Too often.

Looking at my feed, I’m in a lot of mum groups. I’d say at least once a day there’s a moan about their child’s school (fair enough) and there will be, 100% of the time, at least one person saying they should home school.

It is toxic.