Finders Keepers?? AirPods

[UnlimitedCake]

DS (12) recently found some AirPods (don’t know if they are official) on a beach walk with DH and I. DH and I have now had a big fall out over what DS should do with turn. DH told DS they are his to keep and “quick, put them in your pocket before anyone sees!” I told him he should hand them in and that they are not his to keep. DH called me naive, a “nerd” a wimp etc for wanting to do that. I tried telling our son to imagine if he lost something valuable, he would want it back. DH said that’s not how the world works, anyone could come along and lie and claim them.

I tried again telling our son that the right thing to do is to hand in anything you find but I was then made out that I was “upsetting DS” and being “a misery”

We were meant to take DS out for a meal but the atmosphere was so awful that we came straight home. I ruined everything apparently 🙄

So AIBU?! I know I am not but apparently I am now the bad guy for ruining the evening. So what the hell do you do when one parent tries to teach right from wrong and the other just tramples all over it and fights you all the way?!

What a horrible example your DH is.setting to your DC. I once found a wallet stuffed with cash in a car park just before Christmas. I obviously handed it in to the local police station. The owners of the wallet were delighted and came round with a bunch of flowers. Which was unexpected but made me feel lovely. A win-win all round!

Please don't let your son turn out like your husband. You still have time to teach him the right thing, even if that means taking the airpods and handing them into the police (or lost property etc) yourself despite his protests.
Screw what your moral black-hole of a husband thinks.

Yes. Do the right thing! And take your DS! Ignore the horrible man with no morals.

I think I’d be arranging for someone, iPhone in hand, to knock on the door asking about the AirPods. Then they can give them to you and you can report them as found (easily done online).

Wouldn’t it be a shame if your husband’s phone fell out of his pocket and he never got it back from whoever found it because “finders keepers”. On a serious note though he sounds like he has little to contribute to raising a kid with good morals. Why are you sticking with him?

DH dropped his phone and didn’t realise for a few hours.

When we tracked it it was hundreds of miles away.

We called it and the guy answered saying he was on holiday at lost location and had just driven home.

He sent it through the post. All very innocent. And very nice/good of him!.., I gave him £60

Sorry OP, you've got a far bigger problem going on here than the AirPods. I'm sure you're aware of this 😕 good luck.

Is there no local Lost & Found FB group in your area? If there is, put up a post mentioning where they were found and see if anyone makes contact.

It's not just the fact he thinks it is fine to keep it without trying to find the owner, it's how much he is belittling you for trying to do the right thing. That's really, really unattractive behaviour.

@DaisyHaites

maybe, but they are only 10 miles away, so totally irrelevant and they are quite likely to have been wrecked left down at the beach.

Ew, putting a stranger’s air pod in your ear 🤢🤢 just no. Also agree it’s not finders keepers.

Advertise them on your local local and found/community Facebook page.
Karm will come around for your husband and son, no doubt. A good lesson.

Whether or not they can be traced depends entirely on what generation of AirPods they are. The older ones can’t be tracked by the owner unfortunately (I almost lost a set this way). They have to he within Bluetooth range of your phone, which the owner won’t be.

If you pop open the case/keep it open and go to Bluetooth on your phone, will you see the name of the airpods?

After charging them, of course.

The police gave your address out to a random person? 😮

When ds was 12 he found a diamond engagement ring at the bottom of the swimming pool. It didn't even cross his mind to keep it, he handed it in. The upset owner was very grateful that someone had handed it in. I'm sure the air pod owners will be grateful too but your dh is a twat

If it makes you feel at all better, i have a friend who saw a bloke on her regular commute get up and leave his Air Pods on the seat behind him. She snaffled them and even wore them the next day when he was in the same carriage. People are either honest, or they're not. It's not negotiable depending on the circunstances. Teaching kids that is a very important lesson. If there was no-one about to give them back to, it does become a little more complicated I guess but it's back to being an honest character or not. Handing them in because they're not yours is the only option really. I'm with you OP.

(Having now read the other posts about Air Pods being trackable, I wonder how my friend is getting on with her new kit. What she did was brazen and she deserves to be caught.)

I think your husband is being a total arse & I'll be honest I think I would do something quite extreme to show my child why being decent and honest is the right thing.

I think I would make sure something he cares about is lost.
Either gone for ever or lost for a few weeks and then have someone you know (that he doesn't ) return the item.

Your husband is the bigger problem, parenting with someone with zero morals is going to be tough. No way out of that one.

A solid sit down just the two of you & parenting talked through - if that doesn't work, something he loves or several somethings will need to be lost too

I use tracker on mine and can see them when they are in another country when my daughter borrows them

I would pop a post on your local Facebook groups saying you've found some air pods and hopefully they'll call round to collect. Don't tell your husband though and let him answer the door. What a disgusting example he's setting his child 😞

Posted too soon

but what an unattractive trait in a partner and father to your children. This would be instant ick territory

As a teen, I think I would have kept them tbh or at least wanted to. My parents would have made me hand them in though.

Your husband and his name calling sounds horrible and totally unnecessary. Are you okay?

Airpods aside, it's pretty shocking what you're modeling to ds about relationships.

A husband who feels it's perfectly ok to call you names and browbeat you. And your son learning that he should side with his morally bankrupt dad.

Thanks for all your replies. Just reading them
all now. My plan is to sit down with DS when DH is out of the house and have a long conversation about the morals of the situation, how he would feel if he had lost something he really cares about or has saved up for. I couldn’t deliberately take something of his but I think just having a long long conversation about what you should do in such a situation. I can only do my best to influence him in the right direction as even if I split from DH he would still be in his life as a (negative in some aspects) influence. DS does luckily pull DH up on some of the ridiculous things he says and I can only try and work very hard to influence him for the better. Bloody hard work though when DH undos any positive work I do with DS.

Genuinely how can you stay with someone like this? I mean I cant imagine he was a saint before now but that level of low morals and the way he is speaking to you, how are you remotely attracted to him.

It may seem ott to some but I really couldnt be with someone like that.