Help DH won't wear speedos but going to France!

[letitgoletitgo6]

Taking DCs to Disney land Paris in May. DH has severe body dysmorphia and getting clothes that he will wear is a nightmare as he genuinely hates the way he looks (there's absolutely nothing wrong with the way he looks but it's not as easy as just telling him that!)

So I've recently found out about the law in France about all men and boys having to wear speedos when swimming. We aren't staying at Disney we are staying at the centre parks so we definitely plan on going swimming. He's point blank refusing to wear them which I do completely understand as he will worry about it every hour until we go. However if he doesn't go then non of us can go in as Dc are small and can't swim without help and I can't help both on my own. Is there a speedo alternative that's a bit more body forgiving that I could suggest to him?

He can. He just wont be allowed in the pool if they enforce it.
Ive been in many sites in France and only in one was it not enforced.

I have Body Dysmorphia; you can’t just “get over” it any more than you can just get over Bipolar Disorder.

Would you say that to a women who is being made to wear a bikini ?

Sorry no suggestion OP.

The males in my family never wear speedos in France.

It might be required in some pools. But it's not the law op.

They aren't.

Do people not shower before going into pool?!

The rule about wearing exclusively body-hugging swimwear (not just speedos but also lycra shorts) in pools in France is designed to keep swimmers (e.g. teenage boys) from entering the pool in their quite possibly dirty streetwear shorts, which aren’t hygienic. However, so long as the pool supervisors can guess that a swimmer is probably wearing clean swimwear (e.g. middle-aged tourist), they can be very flexible about the body-hugging swimwear rule. So, I don’t think your husband need worry much about being banned for wearing baggy shorts type swimwear, so long as it is clean and used only for swimming. Some pools have swimcap rules also for hygienic reasons. If you don’t have a swimcap, you can usually buy one inexpensively at a vending machine near the ticket / reception desk.
Too bad your husband has such negative body image issues though. Bodies come in all shapes and sizes—beauty is in the mind of the beholder as well as projected from the mind of the body owner. IMHO, there’s nothing more attractive than someone who exudes confidence, regardless of their height, shape, weight, hairiness or whatever.

Hi, I live in France. In any pool, men can wear any close-fitting Lycra shorts, from Speedos to kneelength. Women can wear a one piece traditional swimming costume (and usually/often a bikini as long as the bottoms aren't a thong or the bikini see-through or too lacy or generally sexy.)

You can't wear 'burkinis' or surfwear (like swimsuits with full legs for men or legs for women) or rash vests for adults or T-shirts.

Private pools will obviously have their own rules (or lack thereof).

Hope this helps.

There is a rule but it's rarely implemented.
I bought DH and DC speedos in case they needed them but they didn't.

Been to France every year for past 15 years, never seen it enforced!

Why can't you wear a rash vest? They are clearly swimwear - nobody is wearing one all day because they get quite hot and uncomfortable out of the water - so the hygiene factor isn't relevant.

I've stayed at centreparcs in France recently. None of my boys or husband wore speed's. Its not enforced.

Really don’t think it’s an issue, our 2 wore normal swimming shorts and have done for years in France, never had a problem

Well, this thread has reminded me to buy DH some budgie smugglers for our Eurocamp trip this summer. We’ll have DD5 and DD3 with us, so I hope he won’t be too embarrassed by the laughter and the Daddy I can see your willy through that comments!

I skied two or three times a season as a child/teenager (when parents paid, can’t afford to now), usually at least once a year in France, and cannot recall ever seeing my DF or DB in tight swimwear. Do they have different rules in ski resorts? Or have I just blocked the image from my brain for my own sanity?

If it was the law, yes. It’s possible to have every sympathy with the OP’s husband whilst still acknowledging that France isn’t going to change the rules for him.

Forget about getting speedos. DH and DS went swimming every day in that exact centre Parc near Disneyland in board shorts last summer. We didn't even know this was a thing!

In a public swimming pool in the French alps last summer it was definitely the rule - a big ‘no shorts’ sign as we went in. All the men had the trunks.

We got DH and DS the shorts type so a bit less revealing. They were moaning at first but soon got used to it. My opinion - well I’ve had to put my middle-aged lumpy body into a tight swimming costume every summer in order to go swimming with the kids, so I wasn’t particularly sympathetic to their moaning about tight trunks!

I think the British generally have more body hang-ups though. In other parts of Europe they are more relaxed.

In Austria the saunas don’t allow any swimming costumes at all…. !

Wear them under regular shorts. I believe the issue is they don’t want baggy ones letting stray pubic hairs loose.
get him to wear them under then if he is asked he can show he has them on but shorts are safety blanket as it were

The OP has resolved this issue, if you read the thread, she has discovered where she is staying is relaxed on this.

But in pools where this rule applies, wearing trunks under shorts will not cut it. The issue is that shorts can be warn about town before, so they are not deemed appropriate swimwear.

How on earth will anyone feel better wearing trunks. I lived in France. I have many friends there and generally its a country that dislikes foreigners that do not conform to their culture in their country and their rules.

As they should!

Your DH needs to wear briefs or he’ll stand out as a tourist. French do it for hygiene and they really don’t like trunks in pools. The worst thing would be for DH to get called out by someone. Mind you, you could ask the hotel ahead of time.

It's hidden under health and safety but it's to enforce the 'laicity' of public spaces i.e. prevent anyone from wearing religious dress, just as girls aren't allowed to wear long dresses to school.

Separate perhaps from the holiday in a way, OP I do hope your DH can get the help he needs to feel comfortable in his own skin.

Interesting. I live in a place with high skin cancer rates and you really don't see many kids swimming outdoors without rashies, and more and more adults are wearing them now too. I know I'd feel strange without my rashie on.

It is definitely a firm rule in public swimming baths in the South West of France. Its for hygiene reasons only, e.g. to avoid sweaty people coming in after exercise/sport spreading their smell and possible germs

On the tight bermudas, I would be careful because anything that looks too much like cycling shorts may be rejected!

It is annoying as the 'maillot de bain' are rarely flattering! Also its arguably a bit pointless, as there is a strong expectation that people will take a quick shower before getting in, and young children will still do what young children do in the water!

I think it’s a hygiene thing so that people aren’t wearing their day to day clothes in swimming pools.