What is he doing in the toilet all this time?

[heartandflower]

Dh gets up and goes straight to the toilet, he's in there about half an hour, comes home from work and the first thing he does is go to toilet for about half an hour, sometimes he will have additional toilet breaks all lasting around the same time.
I have asked him what takes so long and he just replies he's having a poo.
Is this usual behaviour? he does it when we are at my parents house or his, his mum once said he's always taken forever in the toilet.
We've been married over 10 years and there's no other strange behaviour but I do wonder why he feels the need to sit on the toilet so long.

I once read advice from a doctor saying a poo should take no more than 1 minute, that you should wait until you're ready to go rather than straining/forcing.

I tend to do this ever since 😄

I’m often the first to point out crap men, but in this case, maybe some of them are trying to get away from partners who seem quite controlling if they’re monitoring toilet breaks and turning off the WiFi. Wtf?

If they’re not stepping up as partners and fathers then tell them or leave them. Other than that, monitoring someone’s toileting and turning off the WiFi is controlling.

Just having undisturbed alone time I think. They definitely do it to avoid doing chores though 😂

Op is this a new thing ? Is there a health issue maybe ?? Probably not.. I'm sure it's all good but worth a little thought if bowl habits have changed .

There's a bunch of research on this, maybe because (female) scientists got bored of it too....

As a pp said, average time taken was found to be less than 1 minute, for both men and women. So whatever they're doing in there, it has very little to do with their need for defecation.

If I'm honest? I do that sometimes too. Last year I made good use of 'poo time' to race through to the end of the latest Robert Galbraith book, away from the endless needs and requests of my family 😂

It’s not just men! I can spend a while doing a poo admittedly, I don’t go on my phone or anything. But I do have IBS so that might factor into it

This is the reason we shouldn't spend long in the toilet as it can affect fertility with too much testosterone. Opposite for men

How is sitting on their arse playing on their phone increasing testosterone levels?

As someone said before, it's quite common for men to look at porn in the loo, that way they don't get interrupted & have privacy. See if he takes his phone in there or a book! My EX (yes I dumped him!) used to say he was playing candy crush in there! I found out he wasn't! Hence he's now my ex!

How would you know if he was looking at porn? The adamancy of your assertion is amusing

His mum has said he’s been like that forever so I doubt it’s a new thing. Some people just take longer then others! Some people also like to scroll on their phone and hide from the children

Bloody hell, really?

I guess I really do have IBS if that is the norm!

I hear this so often from blokes that at this point I genuinely think our muscles are just better at pushing.

Crikey!

Speaking as a man I'm literally once a day about 3 minutes done, I guess bodies are all different but wow that's going to be a lot of your life sat on the toilet !

I know that when DH gets up in the morning, I've got a 45 min snooze..... Him flushing is my cue to get up

According to MN, extended man poo time is completely normal, so it's nothing to worry about. However if he's hogging the only toilet in a house of 5 people for that long, he should at least have the courtesy to ask if anyone needs the loo before he goes for ages.

Hiding. It's the modern day garden shed/garage, with the added advantage of a good cover story and a lock on the door.

I will never for the life of me understand why men spend so long in the toilet. It’s germy and smelly, yet they sit for ages smelling their own 💩 while on their phones or reading etc. Why don’t they want nicer surroundings? As a woman I go to the toilet to do what I have to do and leave, why wouldn’t you? 🤣 It does seem to be a pretty common phenomenon though.

My partner can disappear for over an hour at a time. My legs would go numb if I was sitting on the loo that long!

Normal! My husband can go to the toilet 4 or 5 times a day at 20 to 30 mins at a time... when I ask what he does he says. Shitting!

But he isn't... he's on his bloody phone! Playing games... watching up on sport, Facebook...

It does my head in cos you can also guarantee that when we are going out.... he will announce I need a poo...

I'll tell him to be quick... but nope! I've started telling him half a. Hour before we need to leave so I know he will actually be ready on time...

The fact they assume that straight away probably says more about where thier minds are to be fair.

Ban phones in your bathroom (dirty and unhygienic anyway🤢). Bet they're quicker then 🙄😄

My dh has never done this, but my ds does.

Mine is usually sat there for ages reading sports news/videos on his phone. Told him it’s gross but oh well 🤷🏼‍♀️