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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To hate taking toddler round peoples houses

54 replies

Jenny245 · 15/04/2024 19:36

It’s my idea of hell. My friend who has a baby doesn’t get it. She says oh bring him along! I say I don’t want to because he’ll destroy your house. She laughs it off. But it’s not enjoyable for me, I’m up and down every 2 seconds because he’s into everything. I don’t want to spend my time saying no repeatedly, I’d rather meet outside and let burn off energy.
What’s put me off also going around is the gathering is at 4pm. Would you take a toddler somewhere at 4pm even if their bedtime was at 6pm and had nursery the next day?

OP posts:
LookAtThatCritter · 16/04/2024 19:45

I don't enjoy taking my toddler round places that aren't childproofed either - it's not fun for anyone. The host say they don't care but probably will if the toddler starts waddling towards something expensive and breakable. The inbetween nap and bedtime wouldn't bother me though, unless we had to drive and I knew we wouldn't be able to keep them awake in the car.

Samlewis96 · 17/04/2024 11:35

Yourethebeerthief · 16/04/2024 19:08

You're advice to OP is this:

"I just never put them to bed until more like 7:30pm-8pm when they were little"

This is useless to OP. Her child goes to bed at 6 and sleeps til 7. Mine does too. He'd be physically sick if I kept him up later than 6, he'd simply collapse with exhaustion. Why should someone force a child to stay awake so that they can see more of them? They'll stay awake longer when they're older and ready to.

Your "advice" is to "just" not put them to bed til 8. That's not helpful to the OP. She is looking for advice regarding not visiting friends who don't have toddler-proofed houses and are at the baby stage so don't get the stress of minding a toddler, and who also don't understand that staying out past 4 is no good to OP either.

Like I say, OP stick to what works for you. Your friend will likely have her eyes opened when her child hits toddlerhood. Most people would kill to have a child that sleeps reliably 6-7. I love it, he's thriving from consistent solid sleep and there are years of late night/evening visits to friends and family ahead when they're a bit older.

Show quote history

Hmm I guess your child isn't in nursery until half 5 then. Sometimes it would be physically impossible to get them in bed until 6. And I still had an evening to myself. What time are the parents going to bed as they need kids to be asleep by 6 to get time to themselves. I live in a commuter town Many people don't even get home till 6.30/7 pm

Original poster
Jenny245 · 17/04/2024 12:38

So DH did the 7:30 bedtime last night and it worked perfectly fine. I staggered things so did dinner a bit later than normal. DD was ok with it and woke around 7am. We still managed to get an evening and went to bed at 11pm.
After these comments and discussing with DH I will visit friend at 4pm but only stay a couple hours and let DD fall asleep in car home.
I am going to have to suck it up when it comes to DD trying to get into everything at friends house. I will just watch like a hawk and hopefully friend can see how hard work it is and be understanding.

OP posts:
iLovee · 17/04/2024 12:42

If I'm out any time from about 6 (unless we are in a pub/restaurant!) with my two I normally bring pjamas and get them changed before the drive home 😊

Makes it easier as its one less thing to do.with a cranky toddler!

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