'Just cut back'

[Maverick99]

Talking to my mum today. She asked if I'm ever going to buy a house. I'm a lone parent on £35k a year. Childcare fees ruined me. Trying to apply for better jobs but this isn't always quick. The bank will only lend 157.5k (on paper) but realistically because I have a dependent its less. Saving and buying a house just isn't possible. I'm 33 and life is relatively shit, all because I have no money. I was so proud of myself for saving 1.5k but then my car broke down, £800 to fix. Back to having no money. I don't even believe people anymore when they say things will get better. They probably won't. I'm feeling pushed into dating again just so I can afford to live a decent lifestyle. Not sure what I want 2bh from AIBU just feel like a total failure and needed to offload.

Do you have any prospects of improving your income? At your age I earned similar but I am 39 now and earn almost double that. Or can you work more hours, find cheaper childcare. Are there things you can cut back on?

It's really hard to get on the property ladder these days but things do change.

Say to your mum her offer to help with free childcare is very appreciated and will definitely help you to reduce your nursery bills

Can you rent a four bedroom house and rent out two rooms?

The good news OP is that the childcare fees won’t last forever, and it will be much much easier to save once those are out of the way.

@hottchocolatte that's amazing, please share how you did that in 6 years 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼

The childcare fees have stopped mostly (wraparound care costing me £120 a month) but my rent is 1k nearly and with bills, council tax, food, other bits, it's nowhere near enough to save for a deposit. I'm desperately applying for other jobs. Applied for 3 today. Keep everything crossed for me.

Depends where you live and if a house is affordable

Just cutting back, isn't, ha, cutting it obviously

I've cut back on everything. I'm applying for jobs. I would need to save 10k+ for a deposit and that would take me years.

Is there any way you could move back in with your mum, since she’s asking about you buying a house? I’m just thinking realistically if you need to save 10k for a deposit if you moved back in with parents even for 1 year you could quite easily save 10k+. Even just from not paying rent for that year you’d have £12k, of course paying some kind of rent/board to your parents and doing own food shopping but you could easily have £15k in savings if you could do that?

That's not legal

When was the last time you rented a property? There is no way in hell she will get through affordability checks for a 4 bed property on 35k.

Is there any mileage in a rent to buy option,? Locally they were allocating some new builds for the scheme? Might be more obtainable. Things will get better though, don't wish your life away.

We are in a similar situation. DH and I met volunteering overseas, we decided to settle here and probably spend £20k on visa fees and now we have 3 kids and we have no savings at all. We keep trying to cut back but then like you we make some savings and something breaks and we are back to square one. It makes me really nervous as I have a colleague who could never afford to buy and now he can't afford to retire as he still needs to pay rent of around £1k a month.

It sounds like your Mum is a bit out of touch financially, either because she was a much higher earner, or she bought many years ago when one salary was enough, or her house was affordable in relation to salary. Whatever the reasons it really isn't so easy to get on the property ladder now. Are you happy renting? Have you explored shared ownership? Could your Mum release some equity to help you out with the deposit?

My son is going for a mortgage with shipton I think , it’s no deposit and based on what he pays in rent . Ask your mortgage advisor. And every good luck . X

Not many landlords would allow subletting.

Check Skipton BS. They have a 100% for renters.

I assume you've cancelled your Netflix... Stopped drinking starbucks coffee? Oh and you better not be thinking about avocado on toast....

According to my boomer parents that's all anyone needs to do to buy a house and have a very comfortable life!

Could you do a partial ownership scheme? I see a lot of properties near me up for around £100k on the ownership part.

cutting netflix is stupid if you're saving money! save money, stay in, watch 17 seasons of it's always sunny in philadelphia with a MUG OF TEA!

fAIR COMMENT, i didn't think it would be easy. I rented ten years ago and it was indeed shit.

TEA!!! 😮

Steady on Rockefeller......tepid water only

Would moving somewhere else work OP? Obviously not easy at all as a single parent but can you WFH and move to somewhere more affordable?

According to my "boomer" husband that's right, and far more that wouldn't pass through these comments.
Tough.

Work more hours as a single parent?

And that's your story but not everyone can double their income especially when they have a young child to focus on!

This is going to sound brutal OP, but will you inherit your Mum's house one day?

This was what I was going to say.
I know it's not what anyone wants to do. I moved with in my ILs for 3 years and that's my and DH's income, no dependents and we are in NI where I understand house prices are drastically cheaper than England. We wouldn't have got our house if we continued renting, it was just so difficult to save but living with them we were able to pay housekeeping and groceries and basically put my entire wages every month into savings.