Children these days don't know how to behave

[DoYouWantMeToBeTheCat]

AIBU to wonder why?

image descriptions for visually impaired

1. Photo of socially distanced lunch tables in primary school with taped areas for seating
2. Photo of socially distanced classroom in secondary school with children sat in masks
3. Photo of child cycling past a play area taped up with signs advising it's closed
4. Front page of the Sunday People with headline that says "Death is all around us.. so follow the rules"
5. Photograph of toddler at window with an old lady at the other side - both putting their hands up to each other.

My kids know how to behave. In public, in church, in a restaurant and at home. They do have their moments for sure but don't see what any of those photos have to do with behaving.

It's a good job they didn't have to endure the bombing raids, the rationing, Dads away for years on end , not knowing if they would ever see dad again

Lots of children know how to behave. There are issues in schools which were already present before covid but exacerbated by it. Mainly down to....and in no particular order... increasing classes sizes and loss of specialist teachers, increasing reliance on cover supervisers due to the recruitment crisis, ongoing impact of the knowledge rich curriculum and reduction of vocational courses due to Michael Gove, the increase in children not being school ready some of which has got worse due to austerity and the closure of early support services such as sure start centres, then there is the woefully inadequate SEN provision with 3 year plus waiting lists for diagnostic testing or the fact that if a parent wants their child tested for dyslexia they have to pay privately. In fact, most of this is because of the tories. We don't need to tolerate and excuse poor behaviour (which isn't because parks were shut) we need to properly fund education....and it's not about teachers wages it's about school budgets.

Very few people have actually understood the point of your post OP.

FWIW I agree with you. I also think the fact that no one understands you is a good indicator of why all that bollocks happened in the first place.

Also people want to move on because they genuinely believed they were doing the right thing at the time and they don't want their own stupidity to be pointed out to them, which I think it a pretty normal and understandable reaction tbh.

That's ok, it's clear many of them are very full having amazing lives with time to be sneering or smug on Mumsnet.

I'll ignore the damaging societal cost and go back to concentrating on my own family - as advised by many on here. I'm sure the sun will be shining out of my arse in no time.

You don't think children with special educational needs weren't also disproportionately effected by lockdown? (For better in many cases, for worse in others)

Very few people have actually understood the point of your post OP.

Maybe I've missed something, but from what I've gathered the OP's point is that a) lockdown was traumatic for children b) lockdowns are why children are behaving badly c) people aren't showing understanding and making allowances to children for their behaviour because they don't seem to understand that it was caused by Covid lockdowns.

My answers to those points are a) Yes, for some children it was, to varying degrees. b) No. Behaviour had been getting worse for decades, and was already ramping up fast before covid. c) With my teacher hat on... Could you please give examples, OP, of how schools are showing a lack of understanding? And some suggestions of how you would like schools to tackle these massive behaviour problems understandingly? Thanks.

In my experience, parents are often very keen on the idea of gentle and non-authoritarian ways of dealing with poor behaviour in school until their own child is directly affected by that behaviour.

I'll ignore the damaging societal cost and go back to concentrating on my own family

but you don’t seem to be. Given you say you haven’t moved on from covid

Spring 21!

@Usernamen Boris's plan B was announced in December 21, and ran through to the early months of 2022.

I'm sure of the dates. I was undergoing chemo at the time so having to work from home helped me a lot.

'I'll ignore the damaging societal cost and go back to concentrating on my own family'

But OP, as a parent, I can't help other people's children, and my interference would certainly not be welcome.

What I can do is concentrate on my own child and make sure he models good behaviour to those around him. Any teacher will tell you that if you have 30 well behaved children in the class, the 3 disruptive kids will quickly be less disruptive.

So 'concentrating on my own family' is actually the best thing I can do to support wider society.

Maybe my memory is going, but I thought the third and final lockdown ended around April 2021 with remaining restrictions being lifted by July 2021 (I think so called ‘Freedom Day’ was July 19th 2021).

So it’s been 3 years since lockdown ended.

What’s your point OP? Yes Covid affected development. Kids are generally resilient though and are playing catch up quite nicely.

I think it’s less to do with covid and more to do with permissive parenting.

When I was little I wasn’t allowed to crawl over my parents and dig my elbows into their face, steal their food and have my endless whinging constantly entertained. Parents now seem to allow themselves to be tortured ‘because if I don’t let them they’ll think I don’t love them’, it’s nuts

I don’t think schools are showing a lack of understanding.

I can concentrate on my own family and continue to be affected by Covid given how it disproportionately affected my family.

Think every one of us on mumsnet can be guilty of having “better things to do” as we all post on various topics. You’re all here posting on this thread after all.

Op, my point is

you say you have not moved on from covid.

i say, that should be your focus. Because that will impact your children.

worry about other children after you’ve addressed fact you’re still ver much still tied up with covid.

When just as this thread demonstrates… most of us (and our children) have moved on

The reason why I wanted to make the post, with visuals, was to try and highlight that although covid was "ages ago" it made a pretty big impact on children whose development during that time was severely hampered.

we’re not in reception OP!

All is back to normal now, (excluding signage still up in an enormous number of places asking people to wear masks!)

wear do you live OP? sounds like stuck in a time warp

I'll ignore the damaging societal cost and go back to concentrating on my own family - as advised by many on here. I'm sure the sun will be shining out of my arse in no time.

aside from starting this thread…. what have you been doing by way of not “ignoring the damaging societal cost” in practise?

I thought you were going to complain about the increasing behavioural issues teachers have come across recently.

That might be a good place to lead as there are lots of current stories on that.

I don’t think schools are showing a lack of understanding.

In your second post you said this:

I feel like everybody collectively wanted to move on from the pandemic, but no one is happy to give this generation a little more grace and understanding. I find it incredibly frustrating.

Who is it that you're accusing of not giving this generation 'more grace and understanding ' then?