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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Child unwell on school trip

334 replies

G172125 · 03/04/2024 19:43

My son is currently on a school trip to Disneyland. He started to feel unwell with stomach pains and vomiting. He got split up from he’s group and was left alone in Disney village. I managed to get hold of the teacher to let her know and she said she would go to him. My son then text me and said she said she Can’t go to him because she is queuing for a ride. Nobody bothered to go look for my son for two hours. Aibu to make a complaint about this and take it further?

OP posts:
dapsnotplimsolls · 03/04/2024 23:23

MissTrip82 · 03/04/2024 23:21

I don’t understand why you’re on here - if he’s in agony from abdominal pain he needs to go to hospital.

It happened yesterday.

OnigiriJones · 03/04/2024 23:24

Clafoutie · 03/04/2024 23:19

Your son sounds a proper simp. Why's he phoning his mummy to say hes unwell.. why isnt he using the contact number of the teacher in charge (yes he will have had that number)

I really don’t understand the need to stick the boot in to an unknown 16 year old boy who has done nothing much wrong other than get ill on his own away from home. Is he just an easy target?

Show quote history

Maddy70 is the reason many boys grow into emotionally infantile, uncaring and irresponsible men. It’s the likes of her that we’ll continue to see dreadful relationship threads here on Mumsnet.

BungleandGeorge · 03/04/2024 23:24

It’s not difficult to find someone in a theme park if you both have a mobile phone! And I very much doubt the kids are allowed to leave the site alone in taxis, that would be a safeguarding issue

OnigiriJones · 03/04/2024 23:30

Katbum · 03/04/2024 23:19

At 16 in year 11 I had three PT jobs and a boyfriend in a different town I had to travel by national express coach to see when I had free time. Many times I was unwell or hungover or whatever and had to deal with getting somewhere safe/to recover. The idea that a 16 yo is so incapable they cannot take care of themselves when a little unwell is scary to me, what kind of adults are we raising?

Well aren’t you a bloody saint! Get over yourself and have some compassion!

GrumpyMiddleAgedCow · 03/04/2024 23:34

Sorry at 16 YABU at 17 I lived alone (in a small cheap flat) but still navigated it alone so he should 100% be able to take himself back to the hotel and phone an ambulance if required. I don’t mean this to sound as harsh as it will but you need to teach him to stand on his own two feet he cant live a life expecting others to step in for him (life is a w**k stain)x

DragonGypsyDoris · 03/04/2024 23:36

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

User356432 · 03/04/2024 23:37

BungleandGeorge · 03/04/2024 23:24

It’s not difficult to find someone in a theme park if you both have a mobile phone! And I very much doubt the kids are allowed to leave the site alone in taxis, that would be a safeguarding issue

Well assuming the story is exactly as OP claims, that he was extremely ill and no staff member came to look for him for 2 hours, I would say fuck safeguarding and give my child permission to take a cab back to the hotel where everyone is staying anyway.

Though many things don't quite add up, so I think it's more of a communication breakdown between the child, the teacher and the OP. It sounds like the poor kid was woefully unprepared for his first overseas trip and had no idea what to do or who could help him in that situation. Or, as some theorised, there was secret drinking involved the night before and was just a hangover. So he obviously didn't want to kick up a fuss and get medical services involved. DH is a typical passive hangover sleeper. He would get all the gastric symptoms and then be incredibly tired for the rest of the day. He would also avoid drawing attention to himself and basically try to sleep it off wherever he is.

Murphs1 · 03/04/2024 23:40

I have a child of a similar age and agree with op, I wouldn’t be happy if my child was not helped with vomiting and abdo pain and I’m surprised at the lack of compassion here. Surely you would go and find anyone who was ill on a trip regardless of their age and help them?

TeenLifeMum · 03/04/2024 23:41

I have a 16 yo and if she was on a school trip abroad and was ill I would expect the teachers supervising to check in on her. Some of the posts on here are quite frankly nuts.

last year when dd was 15 she was on the ski trip and fainted in the gondola with her friends. They called the teacher who advised them to let the adult from the ski resort at the bottom of the gondola know as soon as the first student got out. They stopped it, helped dd off and the teacher they had called (who was much further up on the same gondola) contacted a teacher who was nearer so she could get to dd asap. They got her back to the hotel and got her drinking water then called me to give me a full update. She wasn’t babied, she was cared for appropriately and I was informed appropriately.

TeenLifeMum · 03/04/2024 23:43

GrumpyMiddleAgedCow · 03/04/2024 23:34

Sorry at 16 YABU at 17 I lived alone (in a small cheap flat) but still navigated it alone so he should 100% be able to take himself back to the hotel and phone an ambulance if required. I don’t mean this to sound as harsh as it will but you need to teach him to stand on his own two feet he cant live a life expecting others to step in for him (life is a w**k stain)x

He was on a school trip in the care of adults - not even vaguely comparable 🙄

RockyRogue1001 · 03/04/2024 23:44

Jesus.
How much did a trip to DLP cost you at Easter weekend?

Wouldn't it have been cheaper to take them as a post gcse treat at the end of June?

Is this a private school, by any chance?

Whataboutwhat · 03/04/2024 23:49

I think most of us are surprised that the school are running a trip for year 11 now as we have children in year 11 and have 2 weeks of revision sessions in school during the Easter holidays 🤷🏼‍♀️.

I hope that your son is ok op and yes, I would be making a complaint. What if he has become really ill and passed out or something, the school have a responsibility to look after their students.

AnxiousRabbit · 03/04/2024 23:50

So, again
What time did this happen and in what order?
Why was he in the village and not in the park?
Why did he need to be found before he fell asleep? Did the teacher take him to a cafe?
What medication did they manage to find at DLP that helped with V&D?

Motherofacertainage · 03/04/2024 23:55

I definitely think you need to get the full details from both sides before you go in with a complaint. It sounds unlikely that, on being informed of a sick student, all the accompanying teachers simply ignored that and carried on with their day, none of the 9 staff even attempting to look for him. I'm sure the teachers' version of events will be different from your son's and how will you prove either is factual? It is a big park so it's possible there were people looking and didn't find him. It sounds like he didn't go to the guest services so had he not been told that was an option? If not that could be a learning point for future trips but as he is now safe and the illness seems to have passed I'm not sure what else you are hoping to gain from complaining.

ThanksItHasPockets · 03/04/2024 23:55

Ophy83 · 03/04/2024 22:15

?? At our school if teachers give up their free time to go on trips like PGL they get the equivalent time off in term time

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Can you tell us more about this, please? In twenty years of teaching I have never encountered such an arrangement.

Pomegranatecarnage · 03/04/2024 23:59

G172125 · 03/04/2024 19:53

Just turned 16, year 11. First time in a foreign country . The teacher new the situation and he’s location but was to busy on her holiday to bother. He spoke to her on the phone.

Going to Disney with a group of school children in your holiday time is not a holiday!

OnigiriJones · 04/04/2024 00:04

AnxiousRabbit · 03/04/2024 23:50

So, again
What time did this happen and in what order?
Why was he in the village and not in the park?
Why did he need to be found before he fell asleep? Did the teacher take him to a cafe?
What medication did they manage to find at DLP that helped with V&D?

You need help.

OnigiriJones · 04/04/2024 00:06

Pomegranatecarnage · 03/04/2024 23:59

Going to Disney with a group of school children in your holiday time is not a holiday!

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As a former teacher, I can tell you that quite a number of teachers saw these trips as an opportunity for a paid holiday (despite the extra work and responsibility). It’s one of the few perks they get!

OnigiriJones · 04/04/2024 00:08

Motherofacertainage · 03/04/2024 23:55

I definitely think you need to get the full details from both sides before you go in with a complaint. It sounds unlikely that, on being informed of a sick student, all the accompanying teachers simply ignored that and carried on with their day, none of the 9 staff even attempting to look for him. I'm sure the teachers' version of events will be different from your son's and how will you prove either is factual? It is a big park so it's possible there were people looking and didn't find him. It sounds like he didn't go to the guest services so had he not been told that was an option? If not that could be a learning point for future trips but as he is now safe and the illness seems to have passed I'm not sure what else you are hoping to gain from complaining.

I’d bloody complain and as a mother who entrusted my child’s well-being to these supposed adults, I’d have every right to!

You sound like your benchmark is way too low.

Zyq · 04/04/2024 00:10

hoarahloux · 03/04/2024 19:52

What about the other teenagers she's looking after?

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Presumably they have contingency plans in place for just this sort of situation. If they don't, it would be highly negligent.

OnigiriJones · 04/04/2024 00:10

RMNofTikTok · 03/04/2024 22:51

A 16 year old vomited in a very large theme park and became separated from his friends, made the teachers aware of his location through his mother, and was located within 2 hours. He has seemingly recovered, and has not needed medical care.

What's the problem here? It can take the best part of 45 minutes to walk from one end of the park to the other. He vomited. He didn't have a life threatening illness.

Who made you the doctor to be able to diagnose the student? You’re not and vomiting is a symptom of a wide range of illnesses including deadly ones.

Motherofacertainage · 04/04/2024 00:13

OnigiriJones · 04/04/2024 00:08

I’d bloody complain and as a mother who entrusted my child’s well-being to these supposed adults, I’d have every right to!

You sound like your benchmark is way too low.

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My benchmark is establishing the facts first. I find that reduces unnecessary confrontation and increases my well-being.

Zyq · 04/04/2024 00:13

MinervaMcGonagallsCat · 03/04/2024 19:46

He needs to go back to the hotel and go to bed

What if he couldn't?

If your child was taken ill in these circumstances, would you just leave him to get himself back to the hotel while you carried on queuing for a ride?

OnigiriJones · 04/04/2024 00:19

Motherofacertainage · 04/04/2024 00:13

My benchmark is establishing the facts first. I find that reduces unnecessary confrontation and increases my well-being.

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You sound right up yourself too. Does that also help your supposed “well-being”?

neilyoungismyhero · 04/04/2024 00:22

'In loco parentis' means you are looking after a child whilst the parents are absent. Parents have an expectation of their children being looked after on school trips in the same way they would look after them. Even if the child was a complete drip there were 9 teachers that should have been available to help him. Maybe another child would have handled the situation better but this one couldn't cope. Being sick and having the shits in a foreign theme park is pretty unpleasant I should think. If a mum posted she'd left her child in this condition to carry on queuing and enjoying her day she'd have her arse handed to her and rightly so.