Parent and child spaces should be for those with children 5 and under

[seize]

Parent-child parking spaces at supermarkets should be reserved primarily for those with children aged 5 and under, aside from older children with special needs (although a blue badge might be more appropriate where they meet the criteria, in these cases).

I was alone with my 4 month old today, the trolleys with the baby seats are kept next to these spaces. The spaces which have the easiest access to the trolleys had all been taken with the last taken by someone just before me, I reversed into a space around the corner and the driver was shaking their head at me, presumedly because their space only had extra room on one side and my space came up to them (see picture). I was surprised to then see them get out with a child of about 13. I saw multiple other people using these spaces with children looking like teenagers. I was able to get a space which still had fairly easy access to the trolleys, albeit by needing to walk on the road and inbetween the other cars, multiple people had parked in the spaces with the easiest access with much older children. I was lucky to get a space at all, had I not I would have had to walk across the busy carpark holding my baby.

YANBU- Just because someone has a child under 16 doesn’t mean they should take up these spaces, they should save them for people who need them the most.

YABU- first come first served, who cares if someone with a baby is having to traipse across a busy car park holding a baby to get to the baby trolleys.

You’re a bit obsessed over my post aren’t you… You ok?

Yeh I agree with you on this actually. It's difficult to get a blue badge, even if getting hIghest level DLA.

People do. Ds is 14 and has had a blue badge since he was 8.

we have had people having a go at us for parking in P and C spaces. We have had people having a go at us for parking in disabled spaces. We can’t win!

in amongst everything else DS has severe anxiety so going out is a massive challenge. People deciding to play parking warden can make the whole trip impossible for him. I guess those who judge get what they want then though when we have to turn around and go home.

OP, when you're in a hole, stop digging. You're making yourself look awful here.

Can you not even imagine the possibility that a disabled person might feel a bit threatened by this sudden, unwarranted aggression? And that they might not immediately think to whip out their blue badge because they are so taken aback and confused?

Do you usually lack empathy to this extent?

Or stay at home and get a delivery

You don't think that might have been an intimidating experience that left her flustered?

You're being a dick to an older woman with a disability who was physically intimidated by a younger, stronger man in her space. And completely undermining your point in the process.

Maybe she should just choose to be buried under a p&c parking spot at her favourite supermarket. She obviously loves it so much😂

To be honest I look back at my time with one baby and think I didn’t really need a space! It’s more when you have multiple kids to corale who are a liability to themselves and others. To be fair I was very right on about spaces in baby days but now don’t particularly see anyone is that badly done by if none are available in the grand scheme of things (ie first world problems excluded)

I guess the solution is to drive a more sensible car and/or to lift the baby out of the seat. Or, as you say, to get delivery.

Whenever I go, it is a miracle if the people in them have any children at all. I managed to snag one yesterday with my 5 year old. He still needs help with his car seat 5 point harness thing so it is helpful to have that bit of room. Whilst I was strapping him in, a man swung into the space next to me - half in the space, half in the partition bit - and then sauntered into the shop without a child in sight (nor a visible child seat in the car). It was quite annoying but I just kept my mouth shut. I realised that there was a white van in one of the other nearby child spaces, without a child seat present in the car either, so it was obviously the norm.

That must have been a horrible experience.

Having a discussion is now 'obsessed'?
Perhaps if you were less obsessed with where others park....

I'm sorry that people have a go at you. It must be really difficult for your ds.

@ColleenDonaghy this post is nothing to do with a 70 year old blue badge holder parking in a parent and child space. It's about the MANY people with older children who appeared independent and mobile taking up the spaces. So far we have had the derailment of the thread to discuss older children with hidden disabilities (even though the original post stated this is not what the post is about), the terminology of women vs people and now the elderly disabled need to use a parent and child space.

It's needed mostly from ages 2-7 I found. At baby age it's easy as the baby doesn't try and run into the traffic. My son 7 year old almost got run over not thinking when coming out of the car first day of easter. It took seconds his mum said. Luckily he was ok due to the car driver quick actions. Children and parent parking It's a nice thing the supermarkets do but wish they do it at the back of the car park away from the entrance with a safe walkway to the entrance. I totally support anyone disabled parking there if disabled is full.

An older woman with a disability is verbally abused and intimidated by a man and this is what you say, really?

You must be the clever so and so that approached me in Asda car park when did was a baby with your funny jokes.

Do you remember I burst into tears and told you I was on my way to the cafe to meet up with useless exdp who'd had her for the first weekend since we split up and was going to collect her?

I don't know how old you are of course, and I don't know whether you are frail and disabled as indeed am I. My apologies if you are all of those things, or if you care for someone who is, as I know how terribly hard life can be. The man took me completely by surprise. I was a lone female suddenly confronted by a male stranger who was shouting at me with an extremely angry expression on his face and one arm on my car door. Initially I didn't understand what on earth he was saying to me. I thought he was trying to warn me about something. My blue badge is in the glove compartment and you really don't move as quickly when you're older. Besides, I honestly didn't want to turn my back on him. I've never had an incident like this before in my life and I can category assure you it was a genuine and extremely unpleasant experience.

I'd argue a baby in a car seat/sling/pushchair is safer than a child of 2-9 and obviously aren't going to accidently swing a door open

My dc were both born in another country- one without p&c spaces and also was lower driving and parking standards. I can't remember EVER thinking - oh no I will have to walk across this car park with my baby. I just did it like everyone else. They are of course handy but really not a big deal. Only when you were given solutions to the carrying/access to trollers did you then make it about the space to get baby out. That can be solved by choosing a further away, quieter part of the car park if it's the true issue

@Kalevala this is not the subject of the thread, they can put their own AIBU post if they want to discuss how they reacted to a situation in a car park at a supermarket which contained one child and was otherwise full of blue badge holders.

She was being intimidated and bullied. It's rather difficult to react under those circumstances.

Honestly @seize your attitude is making me (childless) want to go out of my way to use P&C bays just to annoy you personally. 😂

But by definition children are not independent. Just because a 6 year old can walk doesn't make them independent - they still need supervision near roads and getting into cars.

As my children get older I see a lot of this kind of attitude from first time parents who assume because their babies are so young and needy, older kids can do everything for themselves and don't need help with anything. It is easy for someone with a small baby to think my 6 year old, for example, is basically a mini adult but he isn't.

My middle son has one, he was only on MRC at the time. They did deny it initially but once he got an EHCP the council accepted under hidden disabilities. I’m currently waiting for my eldest to get his EHCP even though he has official diagnosis of ASD and ADHD. It’s a shit fight but what isn’t for kids with additional needs 😑.