To feel uncomfortable being on camera during Teams/Zoom calls?

[JustNodAndSmilee]

I've worked in remote/hybrid jobs for around 2 years, and I hated being in meetings as I become overly self-conscious that I'm on camera, I feel unable to relax and sit bolt upright with a soft smile on my face and just nodding and smiling. It's really uncomfortable and exhausting. I never look at myself during meetings (as I find it really off-putting), yet I just can't relax. I even feel uncomfortable writing notes or looking at my second screen, it's like I freeze in place and just nod and smile. I feel really robotic and struggle to communicate properly.

When cameras are off it's a lot easier, but 99% of meetings at my company have cameras on unless they are just a quick call.

Does anyone else do this? How do I relax? Like I said I've been doing this for nearly 2 years at two different companies so it's not because I'm new or getting used to online meetings...

Also under my desk I am soo fidgety, I'm constantly bouncing my legs and fidgeting under the table, I guess trying to burn off that nervous energy

You can hide your view of yourself, so your image isn't on your screen but others can see you. Does that help?

YABU. Do you cover your face in face-to-face meetings?

Do you do this face to face meetings? If not, then I recommend what the previous person said, just hide your view of yourself.
It's hard not to look at/judge yourself on screen (I find) so once the angle is 'normal' just hide it

Use hide view. People who wfh can’t have it all ways - if u don’t want to work in an office it’s part and parcel of being at home 🤷‍♀️

Oh ok I was only posting to see if anyone related. I still keep my camera on in all meetings and wouldn't want it any other way, just wondered if others feel that self-conscious feeling too

OP massively self conscious and if I don't need camera on it stays off as I can concentrate better without it on

I do hide the view of myself, and sometimes will minimise the Teams screen if there's nothing I need to look at but I still feel super conscious. I'm much more relaxed in in-person meetings. I don't know it's a form of masking as I have being wondering about possible autism

I hate seeing myself on zoom calls, I always look so rough and old, it’s depressing and distracting.

Hide yourself or put a post-it over your face on screen. I find it helps me stop counting my chins concentrate. Sometimes I minimise it entirely and treat it like a phone call. It's all practise too.

Nobody is taking any great notice of how you look. They’re more concerned how they look themselves!

You are not alone OP. If you google, you’ll find lots of other people feeling the same and lots of tips to help. Hopefully they’ll help you to relax.

There are many tips and tricks to help with this online, but it’s unreasonable to expect to have cameras off during meetings.

Use the touch up / enhance feature, I look better than I do in real life with it!

I think in face-to-face meetings you can see that nobody is looking at you very much but in Zoom/Teams you can imagine that everyone is watching you. Remind yourself how many other people are in the meeting, how small they each look on your screen and that you aren't paying much attention to their faces. Hide your face from yourself and try to concentrate on what is being said, really nobody else cares what you look like.

This.

I don't think anyone like to see them self on screen (or even to see a photo of themselves) - so don't have your own picture displayed to you.

It is really frustrating when people make up reasons why they can't have their camera on. Humans rely on body language and facial expressions a lot.
If you wfh, then you need to expect to have your camera on when in meetings.

I hate being on camera. If it's a larger group and content is being shared so focus is in that, I'll sometimes turn it off for a bit during presentations for a rest. I find it also helps to do some exercise before hand, even if it's just 5 mins of squats/jumps before the call

I have an under desk walking pad, and that really helps keep my stress down.

And of course, making sure my settings don't show my my camera after I'm happy with the original setup.

I'm not the OP, but that's not exactly the same though is it?
I can see where she's coming from.
In meetings on Zoom or whatever you can see your own mush in the corner of the screen and it can make you feel self conscious.
In an actual face to face meeting you're not confronted with your own image looking back at you

In my work we put our cameras on at the beginning to introduce ourselves and then we switch them off until we speak. All mics off except the person speaking. chair and key speakers have camera on at all times if it's training or if you're going "round the room" person speaking has their camera on.

They are on also for breakout rooms which tend to be 2 to 4 people.

I can't see the point of having 15 -20 silent faces on screen the whole time.

I think most people felt like that for the first weeks of lockdown in 2020. I know I did.

But then I realised I looked washed out and tired (because I was), adapted my make up to add more colour, and stopped thinking about it.

We all have bad days but I concentrate on my work. No-one cares what I look like as long as my job gets done to a decent standard. And to be honest, a 2" square grainy picture of you on a screen full of 10 people is hardly going to show up at all.

I don’t love being on camera either and find it distracting. I know it’s vain but I bought a ring light which attaches to my laptop, improving the lighting helped me look better and feel less self conscious.

I don’t like the look of myself so I just hide the view. Not self conscious.

I prefer having my camera on. I get confused when to speak if everyone is just a little black square.

OP are you on 'classic' teams or 'new' teams? My office recently switched and everyone's faces like really nice and bright now.

I find it draining to be on camera too, OP. I completely relate. It doesn't mean I would have the camera off or think we should - but I do understand what you're saying.

I think on video calls there is so much more focus on people's faces - you just see faces in little boxes - it's a bit of a spotlight. People can also look at you and you don't know they are looking at you - you can't really see what they are doing or what's on their screen. IRL you are seeing people's whole selves within the room, and you know if someone is looking at you, because they are present with you in the room.

There is definitely a difference and I think people who are saying 'do you feel like this in real life?' are being a bit obtuse. It's psychologically and practically very different being on camera.

I find it helps to just check myself before going on a call, make sure my hair/ make up are OK, preview the video so there's no weird lighting, etc.

I do find the benefits of working from home massively outweigh my issues with it, so I just get on with it.

I also have that problem of just smiling and nodding, and also autistic luckily I work with a team now who are always camera off and tend to use text chat for 90%. Before that though I found it helpful to put my webcam slightly to the side so it wasn’t so full on at me and would turn to face it fully if I needed to speak.