Colleagues commenting on how much food I eat

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It has been happening for a while. I probably do eat more than a lot of people, but I eat more on my office days because people bring in snacks and we have cafe etc so I take advantage of it. I am very healthy at home and mostly have healthy dinners so I let myself have a treat at work as we are only in two days a week and I look forward to it.

However, some of my colleagues have been making comments that are starting to hurt my feelings and I’m not sure if I just need to get thicker skin and pull myself together as it’s just lighthearted, or whether I should say something?

some of the comments are:
”I can’t believe how much you eat”
“if I ate as much as you I’d be 20 stone”
”are you going for MORE food?”
“do you carry on eating when you get home?”
”I bet even your husband doesn’t eat as much as you”
“the calories that you’ve eaten in your lunch are more than I have all day”

Amongst other things. Today people brought in baked cakes for easter and there were LOADS left over. I asked if I could take an extra piece home for my husband and they said yes of course. But then a few people started laughing when they saw me wrapping it up saying “oh I knew YOU would be the one to leave with a goody bag”

I know they are just joking and not saying these things maliciously, but I think it’s rude. Why do they have to comment on it? I feel humiliated and like shit about myself. I do eat more than the rest of the people on my team but I still don’t think I eat an obscene amount. I don’t feel like the comments are warranted.

Is it reasonable of me to say something? Or am I just being overly sensitive? I’ve tried to just not eat as much while I’m in the office but then I feel like why should I? If I’m hungry and I want to eat, I should be able to.

I do get where you're coming from OP, although it wouldnt bother me personally

But just on one point you say, they make it sound like you eat more than your husband. Well so what if you do, or did, so what if someone eats more than their spouse?

I think in other countries they have much more of an open narrative about food, cooking, where food is from, how people eat and its not seen as judgemental.

People really do get sensitive about talking about food. But then I am also the foodie who talks about it all the live long day!!!

Because there’s no need to comment things if they are rude? Who cares if they are factual? Would you comment on someone’s weight? Their appearance? Would you say “you’re full of acne” to someone with spots? Would you say “gosh you’re bursting out of those jeans” to someone who is big? Just because something is factual doesn’t mean you have to say it! There’s no need to comment on someone’s calories in their lunch. I just want to eat my lunch in peace without people commenting negatively on my choices

You shouldn’t even need to say anything or defend yourself. Why is it anyone’s business what you eat and to what quantity? I couldn’t imagine policing what people eat and going out my way to make a comment. However a few months ago I did comment on the smell of a lovely colleague’s home made Indian curry and she brought me some in the following day (for the record, it was incredible!!), generally I wouldn’t remark on what anyone eats.

I used to work with a woman like this, who was a little on the larger side yet was forever banging on about Weight Watchers this and Slimming World that.

At the time, I was playing 1st XV 1st division amateur rugby and training quite hard - gym before work, training or running after work most days, playing matches at weekends - so I'd eat a lot at work (there are only so many hours in the day to consume quite a lot of calories).

I was also (at the time, not so much now that I'm a bit older!) very slim, but muscled, as you would expect of somebody with quite a hard-core training schedule.

She went on RELENTLESSLY about how much I ate, until one day I snapped and retorted 'if you did half the exercise I did, Gillian (not her real name, obvs), perhaps you wouldn't waste all your money on those quack diet schemes'.

Absolutely not my finest hour, but it did make her shut up: she literally never mentioned anything that passed my lips again.

Sometimes you have to stand up to bullies. Yes, the bullying may come from a place on insecurity, but it's bullying nonetheless.

My family do this. Whenever anyone goes to the kitchen for a snack there are a thousand comments about what that person is eating and you're right, it is negative and does make you feel bad.
I think some people just see it as normal and don't really stop and think about the impact their words could have. In my experience the people who make the most comments are probably going home and eating far worse in secret!
Don't let it stop you from having a treat. It's very much a them problem, not a you problem.

Look.them.in the eye and tell them yo stop

CF

I'd tell 'em to shurrup before I ate them 😁

😂😂 might do this next time

You're not wrong, it is rude. Problem is, we're surrounded by people with eating disorders, who think everyone else must be as tediously obsessed with food intake as they are. It's their mental health so, annoyingly, you can't just say "MIND YOUR OWN DIET AND BUTT OUT OF MINE, YOU BORING TWAT" or even "Ohhh, poor you, it must be soooo awful to worry about food all the time [fake tears]"

It's important not to play along. They'll start expecting you to announce the calories/UPFs/fat content of everything you put near your face, join in with self-crit sessions and ask how many Syns or whatever they've had this week. Before long, you'll be as batshit as them.

Eye-rolling and flat out ignoring it are your safest options. If it helps to distract you, try making a chart of who comments when. You could even display your chart and wait for someone to ask what it's about 😏

They are probably the sort on continuous diets, who watch every calorie.
I think l must have same metabolism as a greyhound. I am tall and slim, always hungry at break time. The fuss that the smokers or dieters make because l have more than them, it's so friggin boring.
I feel like saying to the chimneys, at least my fingers and teeth aren't bright yellow, but Oh No, that would be rude!

Well if you have no manners and are a fat shaming cunt, maybe...

Yes one of the women who comments on it is a smoker and doesn’t eat anything at all. She says she would rather break her 30 minute lunch break up into 3 10 minute cigarette breaks. I think that’s absolutely crazy to prioritise smoking over eating. But I haven’t said a thing to her about it… because it’s her choice and none of my business!

Obviously it depends on how it’s being said but in my office there is a lot of food related chat in general, we’re constantly asking who’s having what for breakfast, or oo what have you got for lunch, what you having for tea etc😂 so if you were genuinely snacking constantly all day somebody would probably mention it, not in a nasty way at all though

I get it. I only eat at lunchtime. My response is 'Why are you telling me this?'

Is it possible that they’re saying it passive aggressively in the hope you might realise you’re doing something irritating - do you eat loudly? Or make a mess? I don’t notice when or how much others each in the office but I do notice when I have someone slurping their soup sat behind me.

No, because the only time I eat at my desk is when the snacks are passed around. And then everyone who has taken something eats it at their desk, not just me. My manager and one of my colleagues eats their lunch at their desk. Some members of HR also eat at their desks, they constantly have smelly food and crunchy crisp etc. whereas I eat my lunch in the cafe

Oh gosh OP, I would absolutely hate that. I'm overweight and it's my worst nightmare for someone to comment on my food intake. I agree with the poster who said either burst into tears or say "can we not discuss my food intake all the time?"

One phrase, said with a smile. 'Yeah, but I don't put on weight like you do.' Then walk off.

Honestly if people are being really rude just give it straight back. If they say anything just point out that they started the personal comments and harrassing you every break time but don't seem able to handle being on the receiving end.

I hate this kind of thing. I wish more people would just leave others alone. Having said that I get the opposite at work as I'd never touch any 'home made cakes' anyone had brought in from home.

I used to be able to eat loads! and I was a size 8. People would say it to me, I didn’t care, they were just jealous (which they admitted!) Of course, now it’s caught up with me, god dammit!

I hate this so much. I’d never comment on how much or little someone eats both because it’s rude and none of my business and I don’t really care ! I had a boss like this tht would comment on everything anyone ate ! It’s pathetic ! Probs not the most PC answer but u should start telling them all to fuck off

Just tell them to mind their own business

Ooh buuuuuurn

@AllPrincessAnneshorses it was a joke, with an element of truth. Do you not think they were doing exactly that to OP?