Want to move to have a smaller mortgage/better standard of living

[littlealex2021]

My DW and I are in the lucky situation where we have a 4 bed house near London which means its worth far more than it really is worth (if you see what I mean). I would like to move after my first DD finishes GCSEs but before my second DD starts hers. This gives us a window of about a year or so. The pros are from my perspective:

1. Can be almost mortgage free
2. Can move to where there are even better schools than where we are now
3. Can have a much bigger but still manageable house which will be important I think as the kids will probably be with us until age 30 based on current trends
4. Will still be less than 1.5 hours from London
5. Can enjoy the fruits of our labour now before we want to downsize in about maybe 10 years or so.

There are many more benefits but too many to list (from my perspective). My DW agrees basically with all those benefits but she is kind of putting her foot down and saying she will not move. This is partially as her mum (80) lives nearby (she would still only be an hour away) but also claims that we will lose money as we are leaving the London area, I have pointed out our new house will almost certainly also gain in value and quality of life is worth more surely!

I'm quite upset and down about this and don't know how to try and persuade her. We are both 53 and have a £190k mortgage which we could reduce to less than £50k, still travel into central London when needed for work (maybe twice a month atm) but enjoy the big kitchen, ensuite bathrooms garden, countryside etc that comes with being away from the capital. AIBU?

Very true. But in this scenario they don’t need to move now and potentially threaten the education of the kids. This is a bigger “why would you?” Than the elderly mother in law for me. Because it’s a time limited problem that solves itself in a few years at most.

I think being close to an aging parent is more important than another bathroom.

and you can love the house you’re in.

I see where having the sale cash is nice!

but yeah. I don’t think you’re moving till the aging parent kicks the bucket. That extra hour is a lot, especially when you don’t need it.

I would definitely not move away from London if you have 2 teenagers on the verge of GCSEs, A-Levels and uni. It could mean you save a fortune on uni accommodation. Being in or near London also means access to internships, work experience opportunities, cultural events, sport, jobs etc. Your daughters may prove me wrong but 90% of teenage girls will not give a shiny shit about a big kitchen and countryside - certainly not to the extent of sacrificing friendships and school stability.

Maybe I am bitter because I could not take up an internship offer with an amazing, career changing company when I was a student because I knew no-one in London and my family could not afford to pay short-term accommodation.

I have a teen and a tween and I've resigned myself to zone 3 because I would not give up the benefits and advantages they enjoy by living in London.