To ask for family loan back from estate

[Valleymum2]

Mum loaned a few thousand pounds to a relative. This was built up over a few years with no attempts to repay. The relative died, and now mum has sadly passed away. Am I being unreasonable to claim the money back from the relatives estate? This may leave pretty much nothing left to the beneficiaries .

There’s very little left in the estate as the house was mortgaged and there are other debts too. The family is not well off as far as I can se but there are no dependants. The daughter has ignored the debt in the probate process and I don’t know whether to let sleeping dogs lie. I haven’t been in touch with her yet as I don’t know what to say - I was hoping they would offer to pay it back but looking very unlikely. However why should the other creditors get their money and not my mums estate

my mother gave away a lot of money to others very generously, this is a relatively small amount. However I feel she was taken advantage of and she did leave the paperwork. I think she knew the relative did not have an easy life hence hadn’t pursued it before now.

Documentation of "I.O.U"s isnt every strong.

Do the documents state:

• how long money was lent for
• circumstances when your mum could insist on repayment
• instalment payments, interest or anything?

You mind find it really hard to actually enforce, this sort of family lending generally is, it relies on family relationships etc to get it repaid/avoid conflict.

It will be even harder if lent years and years ago and no real evidence of effort on your mums part to get it back. Remember you aren't the lender, your mum was.

Your mum shouldn't have needed to write off a loan, she lent in good faith and the relative took liberties not repaying. I'd be asking for it back.

If the relative passed away before your mum, did your mum become proactive about claiming against the estate, before her own passing? If not, then I would leave it.
You mention that you mum gave very generously to many, will you be pursuing all of the monies lent out to people?

She didn’t loan to anyone else, everything else was gifts , implying she wanted this to be treated differently - as a loan. She did want to ask for it back, she was very clear that she wanted to be paid back.

Yes - this. It’s not me who has borrowed money with what looks like no intention of ever paying it back. The person who has been wronged here is my mum. Yet I feel I am in the wrong for pursuing it on her behalf. My mum was quite clear that she wanted to be paid back

I think some posters (me included) are trying to suggest that it might not be worth the emotional effort required to pursue this debt, because the chances of having it repaid, seem to be remote.

What @ChateauMargaux said. And let alone the emotional effort, you might not come out ahead financially either with legal costs involved.

The case of Jarndyce v Jarndyce is fictional but instructive...