Startling to discipline at 10 months?

[Yesso]

DS has hit 10 months and has very suddenly stopped feeling like a baby. He’s on the move now, my husband and I are in disagreement about when to start ‘disciplining’ him.

For instance he kneels against a cabinet with glass doors and bangs on it, likewise with any mirrors in the house. I feel we should be moving him away and saying ‘no’ in a stern voice. My husband is happy to let him do it and stands behind him in case he falls.

Am I crazy to think eventually the penny will drop if I keep saying no and he will stop doing it? Husband thinks he is way too young, but if we don’t start now when do we start?

Well in that situation, if he hits it hard enough it will break, therefore it's a hazard the same as putting something in his mouth is a hazard. It's not discipline, it's deterring him from actions that might harm him.

Yes you should start now. I’m more worried that you husband it happy to let him to continue to do something which injuries him.

My response would be neither. At 10 months they need guiding and distracting from dangerous things. If they are fixated with something that is potentially dangerous I have always picked them up and moved them to something that is safely destructive or equally as inquisitive as the thing they were doing.
Personally I avoid saying the word no. Otherwise I would go crazy and it loses meaning. No is for immediate risk of danger in our house. For potential risk of danger we use short sentences that are effectively no and for hypothetical if this happens and then that happens risk of danger we talk them into doing something else or move them.

Neither. The house needs baby-proofing, so he can’t get at the glass-doored cabinet.

This. Plus, yes I would start setting boundaries immediately. Baby will understand the meaning of 'no'. It isn't being mean, it's being a good parent. All children need boundaries.

This is a good age to start teaching words that mean no but explain a bit more. I used “hot” whilst moving child away from hot things for example. For banging mirrors/glass it is better to find something similar he can do. We got mirrored stick on tiles for the baby’s bedroom so she could bang, kiss and pose in safety. Can you find something similar to redirect to?

Leaving aside the fact that I wouldn't have a cabinet like that with a baby, talking about it as 'discipline' is wrong. It's fine to move a baby away from a dangerous situation and reinforce the 'no' but that's not discipline. They're too young to understand the concept.

You can do whatever you want, but it sounds like you need to baby proof. the penny ‘isn’t going to drop’- he’s an infant

I have a 2.5 year old who isn’t crazy wild- but saying ‘no’ and moving away from a dangerous thing doesn’t yield reliable results and she is much older than your baby

you have to keep them away from dangerous stuff. You can’t reason with a 10 month old baby.

No you don't discipline a 10 month old, that's absolutely ridiculous. They're not old enough to understand and they certainly won't have the impulse control to moderate their behaviour. You baby proof, distract and move baby away where necessary. Do some basic research on child development.
It makes me absolutely cringe when I hear people telling off little babies. Pointless, ineffective and silly.

Discipline is a bit silly, as they won't understand. But you can and should move them away from a hazardous situation, just physically move or distract them. babyproofing is stupid, I've never done it - I like my nice house - I just keep them away from stuff.

I'd concentrate on baby proofing the house, especially now baby is on the move.

I disagree about not being able to reason with a 10 month old.
It's not reasoning in the adult sense, but you can definitely convey a message. If done properly, you can sometimes see the cogs turning too. E.G. Say 'hot? ouch' if little fingers are trying to touch radiators. Done with a bit of over-emphasis, babies will learn from your facial expression, if you model it, they will learn that a hot radiator is definitely something they shouldn't be touching. You will see them pause, like they're considering whether or not to continue with what they're doing! Keep instructions about behaviour you don't want, short. Over-emphasise the behaviour you want to encourage.

Yep, it isn’t discipline it is keeping him safe by redirecting. Just as you would if he tried to touch the cooker or run into the road.

No need to shout or impose naughty steps or punishments (which is how I’d define “discipline”). Just “nope that will break if you bang it, come over here and play with your cars” while physically removing them.

You need to do something about the dangerous, easily accessible objects in your house that could cause serious harm to your baby. You don’t change the baby to suit your house. You change your house to make it safe for the baby. The baby is moving - time to move dangerous stuff out of the way. Your baby has no concept of dangerous stuff . It is up to you to protect them.
As for discipling an infant- no- just no.

There's always an issue with the word 'discipline'. Some people view it as a positive, as in, you have the discipline to go training every day. I think that an awful lot of people hear the word and think it's about telling people off. I think @Yesso you are thinking of the former?

Neither, distraction and also acknowledging that he is a baby and cannot help being interested in these things and creating a safe space for him.

Redirect, distract.
Getting into the habit of "it isn't safe, let's do xyz" is no bad thing but it won't mean anything yet - you both need to find him something else to do instead.

Edit: don't just move him away with a "no", move him TO something else and engage him. You are stopping him because it's unsafe, not because he's being disobedient. He's being a baby.

i disagree.

all that loud parenting is for the adult

All they are doing is mimicking you. And it’s not a reliable way of ensuring safety.

It may give you an illusion of understanding but a 10 month old, hell even a 18 month old has no concept of what something like ‘hot’ actually means until they burn themselves. And then it’s not necessarily retained for next time.

they might pause on 8/10 occasions because mummy has done wavy hand movements and jumped away, so they mimic. But the understanding of ‘if I touch that I will burn my skin and it will hurt me’ just isn’t there 100% of the time.

and we need to look after them, 100% the time.

OP is clearly describing a situation that needs to be babyproofed.

it’s not a learning opportunity for an infant

I'd already agreed with the need for babyproofing. That, in conjunction with positive behaviour management, and some great 'discipline' will make the OP the greatest of mothers 👑
Nothing to do with 'loud' parenting. Everything is a learning opportunity for an infant. Considering I've had DC and done brilliantly at it, and I have a Masters in Education, I think I know what I'm talking about 😁

I dont think it's discipline, it's just teaching your child basic safety and boundaries.

Yes this

Move away and distract give other shiny surfaces like supervised foil blankets play mirrors etc definitely don't let them bang on glass.....would he let lo hit the TV? What if he's holding a brick?

Saying no isn't disciplining

Developmentally, the less language you can use, the better. I used, “not safe”, then picked up and distracted. 10 months is not old enough to understand why, you’re kind of getting in that vocabulary early so that the children have it when they can understand. “Hot”, “sharp”, “dangerous” were also words I used. Ideally building to a positive instruction, e.g. “feet on the grass” rather than “get out of the flower bed!”

This