to give my kids so many lifts for this reason?

[JohnAndYoko]

Two teenage kids. Both quite up and down emotionally. Both good kids who sometimes struggle. Quite capable of getting buses/walking to most places they go.

Anyway - I give them quite a lot of lifts in the car. Sometimes to make their lives a bit easier and give them some breathing space. But most often because it's in the car that they TALK to me properly. Something about it makes them open up. And it's not because I/they don't have other opportunities to talk. There are lots. But somehow, the best times are in the car.

DH says I need to stop it, and they should only ever have lifts in very unusual circumstances. But I can't/don't want to do this.

So I continue to pollute the environment and spend unnecessary cash on fuel to keep them communicating with me more frequently/openly during what are basically quite hard times.

AIBU?

FWIW my youngest is now 31,and will never drive, but he lives about 40 miles from me, in a well transport-connected area. He has always been very happy taking himself all over the place by bus and train and has travelled the length and breadth of the country. If he gets a couple of trains and then walks a miles or two, he can be with us in about two hours. Regardless of this, whenever he visits, I almost always drive over to pick him up and then drop him home again. There's something lovely about the two of us tucked away in the car, playing random music and chatting about all the private stuff that might be in our heads. It's like a little confessional, it's a safe place.
If it works for you, don't stop it!

YANBU and I think your DH sounds a bit mean.

That's incredibly beautiful. You're a wonderful mum. Don't ever forget that.

My friend is in her 50s. Her dad picks her up from nights out and I just think it's the loveliest thing ever. I remember opening up to my parents on the car as a teen, and being helped and looked after but in a grown up way just lovely. You keep doing you! Fabulous mum