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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Kissing your kids on the lips?

96 replies

LGyouknow · 18/03/2024 14:55

Just interested to know what people's thoughts on this are?

Kissing your kids on the lips whether it be mother to son or father to daughter and if you find it ok at any age or if there's an age where you think it's no longer appropriate?

I have done a poll as I personally find this strange but I know I may be in the minority here.

YABU - It's totally fine
YANBU - I agree it's inappropriate

OP posts:
idontlikealdi · 18/03/2024 14:56

Depends what the kids think. My older kids still kiss me on the lips but they instigate it.

MaryShelley1818 · 18/03/2024 14:57

I kiss DS6 and DD3 on the lips, as does DH.
We'll stop if/when the children would like to.

jengachampion · 18/03/2024 14:59

I kiss my 2yo and 1yo on the lips but not my 6yo (I have to be careful in general because he generally tries to lick me or bite me or something else unpleasant, which he finds hilarious)

DillDanding · 18/03/2024 15:00

It’s not about ‘appropriate’, especially when kids are young. We have never kissed ours on the lips, I just don’t like it and never have done.

Tatas · 18/03/2024 15:01

I think it's weird when it's older kids / teenagers!

SilentlyCorrectingYourSpelling · 18/03/2024 15:01

Each to their own and nobody else's business really. We did when the kids were younger, can't remember exactly when it stopped but did so naturally at some point.

marshmallowfinder · 18/03/2024 15:02

Kissing on the lips is intimate and for lovers in my opinion. Children had lots of kisses but never on the lips.

Iwasafool · 18/03/2024 15:02

It's a fantastic way to spread herpes so personally I wouldn't do it.

foodglorious · 18/03/2024 15:04

I do yes, kids are 11, 9 and 3, all girls if that makes a difference.

I think my husband does but actually not sure, we love our kids, they kiss us on the lips, i will continue until they stop doing it or turn their head.

foodglorious · 18/03/2024 15:05

Iwasafool · 18/03/2024 15:02

It's a fantastic way to spread herpes so personally I wouldn't do it.

So you dont kiss your children because of that, i assume you've never kissed an partners on the lips either with that view.

SpringSprungALeak · 18/03/2024 15:13

I don't think it's inappropriate if parents & children are happy with it.

but as a child I didn't like it, mainly because most adults had rougher lips & it just felt odd.

as an adult it feels uncomfortable to ME, I don't like it, so I don't. Plenty of chubby cheeks to aim for?! But often children do it, & I don't turn away from it.

KnittedCardi · 18/03/2024 15:15

We're huggers and kissers, head, face, lips, it varies. DD's have had phases of not liking it, but as they have got older, teens, twenties, they now don't care, and are all in!

I got kissed on the lips by both my mother's partner, and my FIL. Which I am sure MN would find horrendous, but they were family, and I loved them, so for us, entirely normal. Mixture of Italians and Brits if that makes any difference. Very diverse backgrounds too

Noicant · 18/03/2024 15:17

I don’t really like it but thats the way Dd likes to kiss me so I just get on with it.

MonsteraMama · 18/03/2024 15:19

It's never really been a thing in my family, either growing up or with my own child, but I don't see much of an issue with it either. My 16yo DD is very affectionate, she'll still come for cuddles and kiss me on the cheek or nose or forehead which I've always thought very sweet, but not lips.

SweetThames · 18/03/2024 15:20

I'm 33 and still kiss both my parents on the lips and did with all four of my grandparents until they died! Don't kiss my sister on the lips any more because she doesn't like it (don't know when we stopped - as teens maybe?) and none of my in-laws kiss at all so haven't kissed any of them anywhere.

Will kiss my kids on the lips unless they show they don't like it, at which point I'd obviously stop, same as anything else!! I find it hard to believe so many people can't imagine that other families may do something differently...

BarrelOfOtters · 18/03/2024 15:24

My family rarely even hugs, Scottish. My Dh's family hugs. I have friends who kiss their 30 year old kids on the lips. Each to their own.

ChesterFoxE · 18/03/2024 15:24

I kiss my DM73 on lips
I kiss my DD 15 on lips
I do not kiss my DS24 on lips
I BEAR HUG THEM ALL

Fridaysgirl17 · 18/03/2024 15:25

We kissed my mom on the lips always, never felt strange or like we should stop,& we did that until she passed 2 years ago,& I kiss my kids on the lips they are 6 & 3, if my son's don't want to do it we don't, I'll kiss their head etc

SOBplus · 18/03/2024 15:26

No great decision making, we kissed the kids on the lips until without discussion, it just happened to stop which was around age 6 for each of the kids. I guess it seems fine for little kids but I think its gross for older (i.e. Angelina Jolie and her brother Aged 24 & 26 respectively at the Oscars)

NameChangeAgain0224 · 18/03/2024 15:27

My kids are 6 and 10 and we lip-kiss.

When it comes to my 10 year old I always just kiss him on his cheek first but I will then kiss him on the lips if he asks.

I haven’t kissed my own mom since I was about 5 but I kiss my dad all the time but only on the cheek.

NewName24 · 18/03/2024 15:30

marshmallowfinder · 18/03/2024 15:02

Kissing on the lips is intimate and for lovers in my opinion. Children had lots of kisses but never on the lips.

Same here.

Iwasafool · 18/03/2024 16:03

foodglorious · 18/03/2024 15:05

So you dont kiss your children because of that, i assume you've never kissed an partners on the lips either with that view.

Show quote history

Of course I kissed my children, just not on the lips. My partner is an adult and able to make his own decisions re risks unlike a baby/child.

Icepop79 · 18/03/2024 16:10

I grew up with kissing on the lips absolutely not being a thing in my family, but my partner had the opposite experience. As a result, I’ve accepted it as part of our parenting - I didn’t want the kids to experience it from their dad and not from me. My daughter (15) instigates it with both of us. My son (10) absolutely hates it and we all respect that and don’t do it to him. He hates giving kisses at all and will offer the top of his head for us to kiss.

Lemonademoney · 18/03/2024 16:13

I kiss my little two on the lips each morning at the school gate but not my older child… I’m trying to remember when I naturally stopped doing it and it was probably around 7/8?

LyricalGangsta · 18/03/2024 16:13

All my kids do it
They are all teens
They instigate it 🤷🏼‍♀️