I don't know how more people aren't depressed

[Springisnear4]

Life just is depressing imo. You work all the hours with no appreciation for someone who would replace you tomorrow, everything is really expensive, you just go through the motions going on some semi average holiday once a year, most days are the same, tiring and boring.

Sorry that I couldn't help you on the financial side. Fully understand how it would make you feel. I was just hoping to help so you could look for a job that you might feel better about

Thank you for the suggestion I appreciate it x

I’m a MH nurse. Do you currently see a psychiatrist? If you have very treatment resistant depression then it might be worth considering ECT. It’s the gold standard for treatment resistant depression and I’ve seen it work absolute wonders for people who thought they were incurable. https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/drugs-and-treatments/electroconvulsive-therapy-ect/#:~:text=without%20my%20consent%3F-,What%20is%20ECT%3F,of%20some%20mental%20health%20problems.

Yeah, I guess I can ask the psychiatrist for this. I don't have any hope left of ever being well.

I get it OP. I’ve suffered depression most of my adult life including a horrible episode last year where I was suicidal and couldn’t get out of bed for six months.
I am on antidepressants which allow me to function but that’s about it.
I view that I have an illness just like other illnesses but mine is not visible as it’s mental.
Sadly ppl like us will always struggle.
Hope you can find some better meds even if they get you to a point where you can function.

There’s a big difference between someone who is clinically depressed and someone who is fed up with their job, their lack of money, their relationship. There was no suggestion in the first post that the OP was ill.

A good suggestion from @JennieTheZebra. I hope it helps.

Thank you but with the amount of different medications I've tried over the last 20 years, I don't have any faith in them anymore.

I wasn't planning on sharing how unwell I am but when people starting telling me to get a grip, I felt the need to explain.

Well it's easy for someone to say that who doesn't have depression. But also, some people need more than sleep, showers and coffee to feel fulfilled in life. You don't have to have 'horrors' in your life to feel like shit.

I agree! ❤️

We are, but nobody wants to hear it.

Loads of people are , but they dont admit or get treatment, life is hard, life is mundane as hell but we have to have stuff going on to lift it,and enjoy life too. I get you

I live for evenings and weekends, taking enjoyment from the little things.

because you haven't got depression,.....duurr

I was going to say ECT might be worth exploring in your situation as well. I have seen transformations in wellbeing for some people.

Yes, but the OP was asking why people didn't have depression, then went on to say that she was clinically depressed. That makes her OP like asking someone why they don't have cancer: she isn't really asking people why they aren't reacting to adverse life conditions, she is asking why they don't have a chemical imbalance in their brain, but she is conflating the two issues.

You have to work at finding life interesting and connecting with others and that’s what makes people happy. Be it going on a walk and taking time to listen to birds, playing a board game, making a nice dinner. All inexpensive things to do. Comparison is the third of joy - avoid that

Really love what you've written here!

I've been feeling like you described in your first post OP. I don't consider myself someone with depression or prone to depression. In my later years, I've just woken up to how pointless and unfulfilling life can be.

Personally, I blame capitalism and the way our society is set up. We're born to be wage slaves and it's very difficult to find any real, meaningful sense of purpose or community. Humans need purpose and community to feel right and good, but it's not always easy to achieve in our lives.

My mum once said to me that the secret to happiness is finding the joy in tiny moments. This weekend I haven't done anything particularly exciting. I saw friends, DW and I took our nephew on a forest walk, I went for a wild swim and rehearsed for a show I'm in.

All those things 'fill up my cup in some way' and add meaning to the daily slog. Is it still a slog? Sure, but I'm lucky I can focus on the small things now- it hasn't always been the case.

I meant to say comparison is the thief of joy

People always say this. I doubt that they would find life more congenial under communism. Now, I do agree that the way capitalism works in this country and in the US is not conducive to maximum happiness, but that is because our governments have lost sight of what makes people productive. Capitalism itself is not the problem, it is the way it is managed.

OP, just a suggestion that you may have tried so feel free to ignore if you have. I know you said you'd tried various different anti depressants. Have you ever tried a combination? I have "treatment resistant" depression but am on a combo of venlafaxine and mirtazapine and its changed my life.

I haven't stopped seeing the "pointlessness" of life. I'm still aware of it. But I no longer care about it, if that makes sense. I still see the futility but I can find joy in things now. I can see a reason to get up each day and to keep going. It's like I can see life is meaningless but I don't care anymore! Which is actually a win. I live day by day and would say that I am happy as much as anyone can be.

I wonder if satisfaction is a better feeling to aspire to than happiness? My hunch is that a life in which you find purpose is more satisfying than a hedonistic one - a deeper kind of happiness.

This is not a comment on depression which is an illness and requires treatment like any other physical illness.

But I am definitely trying to impress on my DC that a 'successful' life isn't just measured in happiness (and certainly not wealth, fame, physical perfection or status) but rather the trick is a combination deciding to find joy everywhere and focusing on the impact you have on others / the world.

There's a good book called Man's Search for Meaning which might be inspiring.

And I hope this isn't horribly tone deaf or patronising - like I said, not commenting on medical depression.

Man's Search for Meaning

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Mans-Search-Meaning-classic-Holocaust/dp/1844132390/ref=ascdff_1844132390?nodl=1&tag=googshopuk-21&linkCode=df0&hvadid=310805565966&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=10486856906335975541&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=m&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9045928&hvtargid=pla-472856926229&psc=1&mcid=94945a6b788e37be8961699080549b41&th=1&psc=1&dplnkId=c96ad8ad-e579-48bb-b05b-703364a8d3e9