To be disturbed by this

[LynzyG]

Ok, so one of the people I work with is quite new to the company. He’s got a wife and 3 children, the youngest being 1. Today he had his phone on charge in the work kitchen (only 3 of us in the office so definitely his phone) I moved his phone as I was wiping the work top and the phone lit up as I picked it up. I noticed that there were 3 notifications from Grindr. I obviously put the phone straight back down but now I’m like ‘oh my goodness, his poor wife’
I obviously would never out him at work but at the same time feel like it’s changed how I feel towards him. To be clear, not because he’s on grindr but because he is on Grindr with a family at home

What does his name begin with?

I’m not going to share that on here sorry

Mind your business. Gossip.

Honestly OP this isn’t about female solidarity - you saw something that you have no context for. Leave it alone.

I knew a couple made up of a gay man and a lesbian, married with kids. They had an open marriage and they were blissfully happy. Nobody would ever have guessed they weren’t an ‘ordinary’ straight married couple. She was also a marriage guidance counsellor. Relationships come in all shapes and sizes and it’s not our business to judge.

I knew of a married man, two children. He would meet men and other women for sex. His house was raided by police and transpires he was looking at things he shouldn’t to boot.

Wife moved away, the children never see him.

Slippery slope.

Good point

This just made me roar! 😆

Disgusting see you next Tuesday but not your place to say anything, I would be judging tho

That's horrible my god

bit presumptuous. I mean how is me knowing the first letter of a name going to help me “gossip”. Did it ever occur to you that perhaps I have 3 children, one is 1 and I have some concerns re my husband?

The children aren’t to the same woman if that helps put your mind at rest that it’s not your hubby?

I think it’s presumptuous to think for a second that this could be your family. How many other people in this country of upwards of 68 million fit the profile of three kids with one being one year of age? If you have concerns about your husband surely having an honest conversation would get you further than scouting for clues on an internet forum? Not being harsh but your logic is honestly lacking. Sorry if you are a having a difficult time, I genuinely am.

What are the chances that it’s your husband?! Pull the other one.

That does actually - thank you!

I’ve posted on here before about something extremely obscure and the person tenuously related to it knew. So you actually never ever know!

See my post above!

Blackmail him for a £100-£1,000 a month depending on his salary.

Keep an eye out in case he tries to murder you.

To all the people saying that he might be in an unconventional relationship and his partner is aware I have to say I think the chances of this being the case are highly unlikely, let’s be honest. I would also be disturbed by this. However I certainly wouldn’t do anything because it really is none of your business and I don’t think it is appropriate to intervene.

Agree. He's a dirty ticket and I would keep away from him and find out in a roundabout way, has he got an open marriage when he's been there longer. I couldn't look at him in the same way after this <judges "family man">

Obviously you don't do anything op as it is none of your business but you weren't prying, you can't help what you saw and you can't help if it makes you feel differently towards him.
Unfortunately it's just going to be a case of you knowing what you saw and not passing that info on to anyone, including his wife.

Not your circus or your monkeys, but I would find it hard to see him in the same light again

I didn’t say you said you would. A poster above suggested it.

my point was that if you can see the notifications so easily so can his wife.

When my DH was a tuniversity he had a Muslim friend who had a wife and three kids and home but would spend all his time at uni on Grindr.

You don't know their set up or situation so whilst I understand being a bit disturbed by it, I'd just forget you saw it.

Maybe he did it deliberately as it appears women can't help but go near men's phones

How many posts on here 'I accidentally searched through his phone it just fell open I wasn't trying to look really truly'

It’s quite a common “prank” between men to download the app onto each others phones when it’s left unattended. The fact it was left on charge in a public space tells me this is the most likely scenario.
I really don’t think a man who is secretly gay, leaves his phone in a public place and allows notifications from an app like that.