To think a stranger offering sweets is a bit worrying......

[michie40]

On the metro on the way home today with dd1 (3) and dd2 (13months). We are standing in the bycycle section waiting the train to start as we are the end of the line.

This lady (40ish) gets on and stands next to us. I thought that it was a bit wierd as the rest of the carriage was virtually empty with plenty of seats.

She starts eating a packet of sweets - so dd1 is looking at her with those big hungry eyes. She then offers dd1 one of her sweets. DD1 goes to take one but I said no (in a rather panicky voice) - explaining that she had had rather a lot of sweets today.

This didnt go down to well as i live brussels and dont speak the language so i am not sure she understood and she moved away. DD1 promptly burst into tears and sulked the rest of the way home.

Now i am not sure if IABU as visions of poisoned sweets and kidnap were going through my head. However the belgiums are very friendly and hands on with kids and she may just have been friendly.

What do the wise ones on mumsnet think?

YABU. And a bit weird.

How can a 40-something woman kidnap your daughter with you there, even if your daughter falls asleep on the spot?

Has it occurred to you that she might actually like kids?

If I were eating sweets/biscuits/M&Ms etc in view of a child, I would ask the mum if the child can have one.

We were at the cinema a few weeks ago with a big bag of sweets and a little chap two seats away wondered up to DH1 and held out his hand (could not have been more the 3 years old) so DH1 says to the little chaps dad can he have one? and the dad says ok and the little chap took some sweets and sat back down happy as larry.

Not everyone is a mad pervert out to harm children.

I wonder how many parents accept sweets from strangers at Hallowe'en for their children without batting an eyelid.

If the person concerned was eating, it's probably perfectly safe. I'd put it down to cultural differences.

Problem is Brangelina, if they are Francophone and you speak to them in Flemish you may be ignored and vice versa. One of my Belgian francophone friends finds it difficult to work out which language to address someone in, and she's 37. What hope have non -Belgians got?
Also, whenever I try to talk to someone in Flemish or French, they always answer me in English, so I'm beginning to think my 14 months of Flemish classes have been a waste!

...and also, all nationalities use the metro here, so she could have been English!

lucyellensmum - no we are certainly not enjoying lovely weather here in Belgium! By children even got to make a snowman on monday while doing an easter egg hunt at their grandparents' house and since then it's been hail, snow and sleet.

Michie - just practise saying Non, merci and Nee, Dank U and that will get you through these situations

LMAO, scaryteacher - when we went to Belgium many years ago we were on a train platform trying to work out where we needed to go, noticed some people standing nearby giving us very sniffy looks, despite this we went and asked them if they knew where to go to get the train and suddenly they were all smiles - 'oh, you're English! We thought you were French!" - they were Flemish-speaking, needless to say. It made us feel quite sorry for the French speakers in Belgium, I hope things have improved since!

Btw, OP, slightly unreasonable, but given the 'don't take sweets from strangers' thing we grow up with in the UK, not entirely mad (says she who's dd has before now been given pound coins by drunks 'go on darlin', buy yershelf shome sshweets'!)