Regular poster but NC. Back in 2019, I was in a relationship I thought was the one. Madly in love with him. Only together 1 year but we were early 30s, making plans to move in together, talk about marriage in the future, all his friends and family said it was the happiest they'd seen him. Only complication was I was separated (2 ys at that point), and going through a divorce (that he was aware of). It was amicable and had been my decision, my ex had moved on, there was no drama except randomly towards the end it got a bit heated over a property we owned. And I was stressed about it which seemed to upset this bf.
The divorce came through and it was the day I had to move some last bits from the house I sold to my exH. This guy insisted on helping me, hired a van, and I checked multiple times he was ok with it - said he was. On the day itself, no show. No message, completely uncontactable, and I had to show up at my ex's alone who ended up having to help me move (with his new partner's help) as the f*r hadn't even given me enough notice to hire a van. Heard from him 6 hours later saying he had been too hungover, but actually he wasn't sure he could deal with my 'demands' aka me messaging asking where he was, and broke up with me.
I was devastated and confused. Covid hit a month later. He got back in contact to 'check on me' and we started talking every day. I asked him point blank if we were getting back together and he told me he wasn't ready to commit until I had therapy to deal with my feelings over the divorce - he couldn't let go of it (!!!). Had an argument, he hung up on me. And then blocked me. This was Apr 2020. Hurt like hell at the time, not so much the break up but this horrible way he did it both times.
After almost FOUR YEARS of zero contact from him, I've now had a message asking how i am and whether i was interested in meeting for closure, but he'd understand if not....!!!
The kicker is I get married next month to my wonderful DP and we are in the process of buying a house together - happiest I've ever been. In the early days of the break up, I'd fantasise about him reaching out and what I'd say to him/how I'd feel. Turns out I feel nothing but mild irritation that he's arrogant enough to think I'm still holding out for closure...
So AIBU for not wanting to respond and ghost him like he did me all those years go? OR should I send a brief thanks but no thanks? What would you do? Meeting him is definitely not an option as it just feels weird and don't want to open a can of worms.