He's emptied half the dishwasher wtf

[justasking111]

I've walked around the supermarket because he's decided to diet . No carbs so I've sourced, meat and vegetable plus nuts to sustain him. I put on the dishwasher before I left. He's emptied the top half left the rest to me coz you know division of labour innit.

I'm so bloody annoyed. He does zero in the house, pink job. Bins I stand outside 52 weeks a year sorting plastic, tin, glass, paper, cardboard, he's a hero for dragging it up six steps.

I'm so bloody annoyed if we didn't share the cooking somewhat I'd chuck him out. Even though some of his meals end up in the dogs

Any reason why this arsehole can’t do his own shopping?

I sometimes half empty the dishwasher I do it when I'm waiting for something to cook.
We sort recycling as we go. Not really that much of a drama surely.

Tis here. He bungs crisp packets, empty plastic packets, yesterday bubble wrap into the plastic recycling nome of which are recyclable. Cardboard for instance excludes pizza boxes. It's a bloody minefield here, which I read up on. We have separate bins which I still have to go through to exclude stuff he has thrown in. We've eight bins plus two plastic bags plus cardboard to sort

If it's not logistically viable to separate at this stage of life, then the best you can do is mentally detach and stop servicing him more than he's prepared to do for you. Only do what mutually serves you.

Have his attitudes become more entrenched with age or retirement or were they more masked by roles in the working/ family-raising years?

You're clearly finding the current structure of the relationship very frustrating and this isn't your first thread about his attitudes.

Is it wrong to be amused by the peas and carrots? They'll undermine his low carb efforts somewhat!

I promise you I didn’t allow my rapist to rape me, nor my house burglar to break in and steal my car keys. They went ahead and did it anyway.

He is 74 so probably not.
Never too old to LTB

He's emptied the other half of the dishwasher so maybe I'll LTB another day 😂

😂😂. I've done my best, they're his favourite vegetables.

He's really into celeriac though.

Yesterday when I sorted the recycling found a box of four Cadbury creme eggs 😂 so he's struggling a bite

Your definition of 'interesting vegetables' as carrots, cauliflower, celeriac, green beans, swede, frozen peas made me chuckle, I have to say...

He won't eat courgette, marrow, butternut squash, red cabbage, white cabbage, leeks etc. sometimes I sneak them in. I love roasted vegetables, he hates them. Now we have the air fryer I have been known to roast things.

Honestly he'd live on peas and carrots sigh.

On the other hand he devours meat.

You sourced meat and veg. In the supermarket 🙄

Not exactly hunter gathering in the jungle or on the prairie....

Yes but it was celeriac...not just frozen peas 😂

I feel your pain and I’m currently grey rocking my twat of a DH.

@InShockHusbandLeaving I assume neither of those examples live with you??
And are disrespectful to you in a personal relationship.
I'm sorry those things happened to you but it perfectly clear what we are discussing

I ,personally, could let the dishwasher debacle go.
The lack of consideration for my sleep needs, particularly at 7am, would have me moving out.
After 47 years, however, I think you've put up with too much for too long and nothing is likely to change.

You think it's funny so you can't be that bothered.

No-one else understands why you're pandering to him

I just have a nap after lunch sometimes, get accused of laziness then.

Well he's cooking tea celeriac mash with sausage, liver and onions. I don't like liver or onions so sausages it is 😂

Ok. You win 🤦🏻‍♀️ Happy to help if it makes you feel superior.

Seriously, do you pack up and leave a relationship every time someone does something, anything, that displeases you? Don’t you ever try to work things out? See things from their point of view? Consider couples counselling? Turning on your heel and leaving sounds great and it works in films no doubt, but in real life people can sometimes treat you with disrespect and you should speak up and see if they apologise or not and, if the do apologise, see if they change their behaviour permanently.

Your trite saying is nothing more or less than victim blaming.

Never a truer word spoken (or typed).

So can I take it you’ve never been treated badly? How exactly do you achieve that? Has no driver ever cut you up etc? And have you only ever had friends, relatives, work colleagues and partners who’ve either treated you like a princess at all times or whom you’ve rid yourself of immediately they’ve been less than pleasant to you? Trite sayings aren’t all they’re cracked up to be.

Nor I yours because I refuse to let you treat me like this 🤣 You’ve just proved my point for me! I didn’t “allow” you to insult me but you did, regardless. Oh, the irony 😆

Woah. Take a breath.
Nobody on here knows what sort of life anybody else has had. I never presume to know either. I just know that we can all expect to be treated decently, and if someone doesn't treat you decently, you can choose not to put up with them.

I think after 47 years it's not as easy as just up and leaving. OP is annoyed but also trying to make light of the situation.