Childminding in dirty house

[Notmyjob007]

Recently started a job as a nanny for two children, one toddler and one school age. I've noticed that each week the home especially the kitchen is getting dirtier. This morning I had to clean down counters, sweep floors and steam clean the floors as they were scruffy. When I started I was told they had mice but were on top of it and house seemed cleaned enough. I don't know if they realise the house is not clean or they are just chancing their arm and know I will clean up.

Ask them that as you are doing cleaning as well as looking after the kids you’ll need to be paid accordingly

You could say that you have a friend who's a cleaner looking for work and would they be interested. It may open up the conversation to know where they stand at least, for example, "oh we're between cleaners at the moment, we've been meaning to sort another out but haven't had time, so that would be great" vs red flag "we don't trust cleaners in our home because xyz" vs the red flag "that's why we hired you"

It may be that they can't afford a cleaner. A nanny for 2 children may be more economical than childcare fees outside the home. If that's the case they aren't automatically assuming the nanny does the cleaning, they may just not have the same standards as the OP or the time to keep things up to a higher standard.

I think it's up to the OP to make a decision:

>To stay as things are.

>To say something (your suggestion sounds like a reasonable approach) that hopefully leads to a workplace you can operate in.

>To leave if the circumstances don't change.

Don't stay where you don't feel comfortable.

I’d tell them that you’re looking for another job because you don’t want to have clean, or ask them if they can employ a cleaner ?…. They obviously don’t see an issue with the cleanliness, it sounds horrible tbh.

I've asked the parents if I can speak to them tonight when my shift finishes. I will update everyone on the outcome and thanks for the advice so far.

Good luck

I think you’ve got nothing to lose at this point op. It’s alright people commenting ‘some people just don’t see mess’, but for the most part I think that’s nonsense. It probably IS a case of different standards, but having standards this low with children in the house and a childminder trying to work in it is unacceptable. While they’re hated, I can see why reverses can be popular on here, as just imagine the replies if it was one of the parents saying ‘is it ok to leave our house smelling like shit, dirt and mess everywhere, the floors dirty and sticky and all our dinner and breakfast things on the side for our childminder to clean up. We just have different standards you see’. They’d be torn apart 🙄

How did it go op? X

Spoke to the family and they were shocked that I found their house dirty. They said a few crumbs on the counter and on the floor is hardly dirty. I explained that I need to clean away breakfast items, clean counters and sweep floor before I can even begin to think about preparing food for the children. They replied with, it's a couple of breakfast bowls, we are rushing out in the morning. I asked did they expect me to clean up their breakfast dishes every morning. Again they didn't see a problem. downplayed it again as a couple of plates. They are apparently very clean as they sweep twice a week!! I showed them the pictures I had taken to show the dirt I sweep up of the floor everyday. They were again dismissive. I explained that I enjoyed looking after the children but I expect a clean environment to work in. They kept saying, kids make a mess, they are kids. I said of course children make a mess with toys and when they are eating and that I clean it up everyday which is part of my job. My job is not to clean up after adults. They were quite shocked that I had a problem with their home to be honest. I also said that on one of the days there were scrunched up(used tissues) on the windowsill, sofa, kids play table and dining table. They said they didn't know how they were there, never noticed. They said they would like me to stay as im doing a great job and the kids really like me. Unfortunately I have handed in my notice as I can't see them changing. I'm meeting a new potential family tomorrow.

Good for you. You shouldn’t have to work in that environment, and the fact that they can’t see anything wrong with it suggests that they are unlikely to change. Did you suggest they get a cleaner? And what did they say when you asked whether they expected you to clean up after the adults?

That's it exactly. The fact they couldn't see anything wrong or didn't suggest ways to make it better made me realise that things wouldn't change. They were just very dismissive when I mentioned cleaning up after adults. They were very passive aggressive to be honest. Their whole attitude was its a few crumbs or a couple of plates and then a little laugh between themselves.

Yea and coffee stains over the floor, crumbs and dirty dishes and worktops - they are slobs and pisstaking ones at that. Sounds like they neither clean up in the mornings nor evenings.

When you leave, tell them why. Poor children.

You need to stop all that cleaning in the meantime, as that sets expectations of you and likely the other bigger they employ.

Good for you!

Fingers crossed for the new family.

Just this morning I was thinking about different standards of cleaning. I have cleaners who are mostly really good but I'm getting increasingly frustrated that the cleaning is always what my mother used to call "surface cleaning". So they'll sweep and vacuum and dust and mop, but, for example, even when I asked them to please clean all the doors and door frames, they just ran a duster over them. These are surfaces that are touched constantly. they need a regular wipe down. Ditto, I have given up asking cleaners to clean the bannisters every time. It just doesn't get done - it's like it just doesn't cross their mind. So these are things I land up doing and I tell myself that at least I don't have to do as much of the surface cleaning except the day to day stuff after meals etc.

My SIL has a very stressful life so I'm deeply sympathetic to her, but I HATE going over to her house as it feels so dirty. She does the basics - the kitchen counters and floors are clean, bathrooms are clean, vacuum etc, but that's it. The limescale build up everywhere is horrendous, her doors, door handles and door frames are not just a bit grubby but sticky and disgusting. There's often dust everywhere. But she genuinely doesn't see it. I once got there after she'd spent hours cleaning ahead of a party. I could tell she'd been cleaning as the house looked a lot better, but it certainly wasn't what I would call truly clean.

It's sad, but worth moving on as you'll always be a bit irritated by this and they will be a bit resentful too.

Good for you OP.
Now you know they can't see their mess and won't change you are right to move on.

To the people saying she should charge them extra for cleaning, I’m pretty sure a nanny’s hourly rate is at least as much as a cleaner, if not more. So whatever chores the nanny is doing while being paid an hourly rate don’t really matter. What matters is that the OP doesn’t want to clean as part of her job. Changing the first hour of her day to cleaning for £15 an hour instead of nannying for £15, while also keeping an ear on the kids won’t really change anything.

I took those comments to mean she should be getting the cleaning rate ON TOP of the nannying rate as she is doing two jobs at the same time. Or she should be getting a bloody good raise at least. Going by the update this working relationship is over either way. You’ve nicely stated the issues op, and instead of considering your situation, they’ve basically taken the piss out of you and laughed at you. They’re not only grotty but unpleasant people all round. It’s really a shame, as they’ve shot themselves in the foot here over an easy to solve problem and lost a good nanny that their children were bonding with. Wouldn’t you be bending over backwards to keep a good nanny for the sake of your children?

Maybe they've seen you clean it and now just don't bother knowing you'll do it!

Why not say you're finding it difficult to prepare meals with no clean surface space and you're wondering if there's a clean space you can regularly use..

You gave them a chance, they chose not to take it. Shame but they've only got themselves to blame. I can definitely be a bit mess blind but if I had a nanny who said this to me I'd be mortified and getting a cleaner straight away.

During your notice period don’t clean up the adult things, pile their stuff on the side and leave it there. Clean only the surface you use to prep food and nothing more.

I am struggling to understand this, the adults have breakfast and rush out to work. You can't surely expect them to ensure the house is spotless due your arrival everyday? And so what to a few crumbs on the floor, why do you need to clean those up? It does sound like you're fussy to be honest.

I agree. I’ve known people who have a nanny and they would definitely not give the kitchen a deep clean every morning!! I also can’t understand how it gets so filthy by morning…