This is not a date

[Mangococktail]

Boss has asked me to dinner.

I've said yes as I enjoy his company. We are both single.

There was no weird atmosphere when he asked me. We were chatting and he said he'd like to talk more but in a meeting wasn't the best place to do it. We should go out for dinner.

We get on.

We've never flirted. We do discuss some shared interests and I do joke with him more than my colleagues do.

I have worked with him for 5 months.

When he asked I didn't think it was a date.

He said he wanted to go somewhere nice. He is renowned for normally being very unfussy about food.

He has not as far as I know taken any of the others for dinner. But the majority of them are in their first job...v young.

YABU...this could well be some sort of date
YANBU...this is clearly not a date

I had a boss once who suddenly declared to me I’m taking you out to lunch (in a gruff voice). He was a magazine editor and very quirky. I went because I knew there was zero agenda to it but that didn’t stop me being mortified when he ‘fed’ me some morsel on a chopstick 😁 Absolutely nothing in it though, he was gruff but a sweetheart.

I couldn’t say if your scenario is the same so you’ll have to go with your gut. And mine was work time lunch, not dinner.

Likewise I don't fancy him but I do like him a lot.

I'm a bit confused.

uh oh complicado.

I dated my boss (ended up long term, kids etc) and absolutely no one cold shouldered me or acted different. There were lots of bosses in the company though so it wasn’t like he was the CEO, which might have been different.

Not sure OP. It depends on your workplace and general relationship. I'm a freelancer and sometimes have dinner (or lunch or coffee) with either male or.female 'bosses'/clients I work for regularly, but it's normal in our industry and always expensed. It's partly discussing projects/informal networking, partly because we get on and it's nice to catch up! I've never wondered if it was a date so maybe your intuition is picking up on something?

I did go to an industry dinner event once with a senior colleague who somehow thought it was a date though. Yikes. Awkward.

Men don't all prefer younger women. I know so many men with older women.
Why does it matter that there are more attractive people at your work? And that's in your opinion, maybe he thinks you are the most attractive.
Are you always so negative about yourself?

Lol I thought this said what is a date.

It sounds like he enjoys your company and wants to get to know you better outside of work. I'd just go and see what happens. Would you be open to dating him?

It sounds like you’re open to it being a date, but equally happy if it’s not - so you have nothing to lose.

Hope you have a nice time.

Well...definitely not a date!

My boss has been argumentative and moody and quite dictatorial today.

It's all been quite tense and not pleasant and neither of us has mentioned dinner.

We have always got on but not today it would seem!

He saw the thread and he's mortified

What could be need to discuss over dinner that couldn't be discussed in a meeting room in the office?

I really did wonder this 😂

Is he on his period today 🙄

😉

Did the dinner happen? How did it go? X

To me, a boss shouldn't be asking a junior staff member for 'dinner'. If he's got something to say, say it in his meeting. At most he could invite people for drinks after work, but again you'd hope it would be the whole team invited.

Sounds to me like he's trying to date you. If you don't want that (I would not advise dating your boss) then make it clear. If he looks taken aback then just don't go.