Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think this school mum is an asshole

55 replies

Fedupmate78 · 24/02/2024 20:37

Son is 10 his two best friends are lovely kids. The three of them have been chums from year 2. Friend As mum is always the planner and we always got on very well. She used to take my son quite a lot for play dates when she was able and I was always so appreciative of it and I always returned the invites but she preferred to have them at her house as it also entertained her younger two. However she never would have brought friend C just my son and would tell my son to let on you friend C he wasn't going to theirs etc. when I had the boys for play dates I would always bring friend C as I wouldn't leave a child out like that. Anyway the last year the play dates have dried up but I didn't think much of it people are busy etc. i would still have the three to ours once a month or bring them out.

well it turns out the play dates haven't stopped she is now bringing friend C who tells my son all about it not being nasty he is just a very open kid. I'm really stuck on what to do I last had them here two weeks ago but now I just feel like not doing it anymore. I find it nasty this segregating them and always leaving one out. Am I taking it too personal or is it a bit nasty? I wont say anything because obviously people can bring to their houses whoever they like

OP posts:
GU24Mum · 25/02/2024 10:56

Does C's mother ever invite them round? Is it that she doesn't like having people over or is she inviting the other boy as they're better friends in which case are you flogging a dead horse?

Nanny0gg · 25/02/2024 12:09

Fedupmate78 · 24/02/2024 20:37

Son is 10 his two best friends are lovely kids. The three of them have been chums from year 2. Friend As mum is always the planner and we always got on very well. She used to take my son quite a lot for play dates when she was able and I was always so appreciative of it and I always returned the invites but she preferred to have them at her house as it also entertained her younger two. However she never would have brought friend C just my son and would tell my son to let on you friend C he wasn't going to theirs etc. when I had the boys for play dates I would always bring friend C as I wouldn't leave a child out like that. Anyway the last year the play dates have dried up but I didn't think much of it people are busy etc. i would still have the three to ours once a month or bring them out.

well it turns out the play dates haven't stopped she is now bringing friend C who tells my son all about it not being nasty he is just a very open kid. I'm really stuck on what to do I last had them here two weeks ago but now I just feel like not doing it anymore. I find it nasty this segregating them and always leaving one out. Am I taking it too personal or is it a bit nasty? I wont say anything because obviously people can bring to their houses whoever they like

Not nice but does she only want one kid extra because of it 'helping' with her others?

Horrible way to go about it if so, she could just be open about it

JustWoww · 25/02/2024 12:09

You would be punishing both your son and the other kid for the other mum's behaviour.
Her behavior of asking a child to lie to their friend is appalling - but you accepted it when it suited you when your son was the one being chosen.
They will be going to high school soon and making new friends - I would leave the status quo but tell your son you made a mistake when you said it was OK to keep secrets.

Nanny0gg · 25/02/2024 12:10

Fedupmate78 · 24/02/2024 20:46

He has another friend he has went on and on at me to invite over but I've been a bit hesitant because I didn't want to leave the other two out (they wouldn't be friendly with this kid and he and my son do actually have more in common). She is the one who goes on about how lucky the three are to have each other such good mates then is the one that leaves one out I just have found it very odd and a bit hurtful as me and her were very friendly too

You have playdates to please your own child - not other people!

Nanny0gg · 25/02/2024 12:11

Fedupmate78 · 24/02/2024 22:45

The 3 do have a lovely friendship I think I just feel a bit sad that even though the other mum says she loves their friendship...she is making one feel left out.

I do think the other two do have more in common than my son again which is fine and there's not much can be done there they have their own interests but it's never affected their friendship before. I will keep inviting them to ours though my son enjoys it and he does count them as his best friends for now

It won't stay the same as they grow older anyway

Sounds like the other mum is suiting her own child's preferences

As should you

New posts on this thread. Refresh page