to refuse to let my daughter and friends go for evening walk?

[orangesyellobanana]

12 years old.
Year7.
5 of them.
Want to go for a walk around the
block when it goes dark at 6, until 7.
I've said no. No need. They're having a sleepover so why can't they just chill here?
Apparently all their friends Mums are fine with it.

YABVU.

Glad you let them go. Just because it's dark doesn't mean something terrible will happen. They need to learn independence and its a nice safe way of doing so. They need to know the local area and that makes them more aware of risks etc. Not saying there are any major ones. Just like roads and stuff.
Next time tell them to bring you back something you need from the shop, lol.

thanks guys. They're back home now and chilling in the lounge. I absolutely wouldn't have said yes before I ran it past you guys (is this wise, maybe yes, maybe no, but I was 50/50 anyway)

@TheYearOfSmallThings Where in East London are you? Children walk around all the time, often to do errands for their family, or just as others says, to have privacy with their pals. If there is no safe/open space for kids to be when they are 12+ then that's a sad situation. A lot of people live in overcrowded housing, so the kids have to go outside for fun and their own experience. I was born and bred in East London and your comments don't ring true to me at all.

There’s more options than having an adult breathing down their necks for them to have to be good, or them turning into complete delinquents because they happened to step outside of the house with no supervision

At no point did I suggest that they would turn into delinquents. If you think watching stuff on their phones that their mother wouldn't love or even performance vaping constitute delinquency then that is very much a failure of understanding on your part. I just pointed out that the reason they are so keen to go out has nothing to do with going for a walk - they just want to go out. And yes, they want to taste some freedom, and talk about things they can't talk about in front of parents, and taste some freedom.

No your not a weirdo, lol. That's normal where I live, there's always kids of all ages playing and hanging out on the streets. I've moved from one part of town to another and its the same in both places.

I was always out and about with my friends as a kid as well.
It's the teenagers who aren't allowed out in the dark or on their own ever that is totally alien to me.

I live in Walthamstow. As I said, kids are allowed out with a destination - the shops, football, madrasa, friends house, home from school, around the shops, no problem.

The groups of teenagers hanging around after dark with no destination are a different matter, and you will be aware of the problems we have had with that.

If you think that doesn't ring true maybe you have moved away?

It would be a no from me.

@TheYearOfSmallThings Thank you, I understand your feelings. I haven't moved away, but do not live in/ that close to Walthamstow. It's more central East, so I guess there's just so many people everywhere it doesn't ever feel menacing that kids linger about after dark. There's tons of people all around at all hours where I live.
I think kids need somewhere meaningful to go, and that side of things is often under-facilitated. I worked with lots of families in extreme poverty and overcrowding, the kids literally have no space inside the home to think sometimes.

Good for you! Did you make sure they hadn’t taken a bottle from the drinks cabinet before they went???

I'd let them go. I remember when I was 13 my friend had a sleepover (her parents were really strict) so we all rebelled and sneaked out of the house at 2am to go for a late night walk through the town.
I'd definitely prefer a 6pm walk to a 2am one.

I’d have said no.