Triggered / Resilience / Decline

[ChiefEverythingOfficer]

AIBU to think that being uncomfortable is a part of life and that resilience is a really important part of mental well-being and the ability to deal with life when it's a shit show.

There are vast swathes of the planet which are affected by poverty, war etc. I bet people in those areas aren't triggered. Rather they get on with making the best of what may be grim situations.

I will go out on a limb and say that we shouldn't have to censor ourselves on the off chance it may UNWITTINGLY upset somebody in earshot and that trigger warnings are not helpful.

It depends on what you call resilience. I've been told so many times in the past my Sen children need to be more resilient. They're the most resilient people I know! People just assume that everything can be overcome with a 'bit of resilience' and frankly, it can't. Take your example of people in war zones, many if not all probably have ptsd, the resilience is doing their best despite that, not avoiding getting it by being resilient.

I grew up in a poor, abusive home. I don’t actually get triggered about it.
I was in an abusive relationship as an adult and I have been triggered from that.At the time your so focused on survival that you don’t recognise the trauma that has occurred. Once your safe and to finally exit the constant fight or flight survival mode is when it starts to dawn on you that your not okay. it wasn’t feeling ‘sad’. In reality trigger warnings don’t work for me because what has triggered me in past isn’t tv, books. It’s mundane stuff that is quite personal to me. It’s things that my brain recognises as a threat because it reminds me of my ex.

It does appear that trigger warnings don’t work for people. However there are definitely times when you might decide to steer clear of certain content and that’s okay. Constantly avoiding difficult situations, however probably does more harm then good long term.

Doing their best isn't comparable to anyone else either. If one person can only just make it through the day and that's their best, that's where they are, they can't magic up resilience just because someone else in the same situation can do more. Everyone has a path , they're not all the same.

@Octavia64 you are just plain rude

I wouldn’t say she is the rude one on this thread 🤣

People living in extreme poverty and war need extensive therapy to recover if they ever manage to escape those situations. They absolutely are triggered while in them but have no choice but to carry on (in some fashion). Imagine you were brutally raped last year and suffered flashbacks, wouldn’t you appreciate a warning before coming across something similar in Eastenders.
Ffs, if you had a childhood punctuated by domestic violence you might want to avoid that on tv.

Spot on - pretty much came here to say this!

I’m always surprised by how many emetephobes are on here.
Nobody likes sick

I'm so sick of this type of ignorance too.

Emetophobia isn't about "not liking sick". It's about a deep rooted fear usually based on a past trauma (in my case a childhood experience with a very unwell relative). It is fear to the point of hyperventilating if a person anywhere in the same vicinity as you begins to look even slightly pale. It's an inability to walk through a theme park in case you see anyone vomiting after being on a ride. It's crossing the road to avoid a vague looking pile of something on the pavement that might be vomit, even if theres loads of room to avoid it. It's panic to the point of bleaching your own hands if anyone at work or your child's school / nursery mentions "sickness bug". Its breaking your heart crying and hyperventilating from the next room while your partner helps your young vomiting child because being near them and comforting them yourself is beyond terrifying and you're frozen to the spot. It's (in my case on one occasion) attempting to get out of a moving car when a child vomited in it on the back seat - that fear response override my rational brain. The last incident was what made me realise I needed to access therapy.

That's emetophobia - it's driven by trauma, fear and panic. It's not just "not liking" sick. 🙄

Nah @ChiefEverythingOfficer , I'm not buying it but.....giving you the benefit of the doubt...... can I just confirm that some people do need a trigger warning - why are you so anxious to prevent another person from being comfortable and feeling safe?

Well I am quite triggered that you aren't buying it.

...

Nope - couldn't honestly care less what you think. Rock on oh faceless internet judge. 😂