To think this isn’t the hour veryyyy longggggg

[Babsexxx]

Good Evening Ladies,

im probably a bit sensitive as my baby was diagnosed deaf from birth lots of appointments at audiology, I’ve really struggled with his diagnosis I didn’t initially as he was diagnosed at moderately deaf.

Then I went down a Google rabbit hole and quickly realised he could end up severe or prefound even immediate panic! I’m a mum of 6 and it was the worst labour I’ve had with him I had a fully retained placenta, unfortunately days before my induction (not knowing what would happen to me) I read a news article a lady had dropped dead 10 days post partum following the exact procedure I had.

I didn’t at that time know I’d end up having the exact same problem/procedure as soon as my baby turnt ten days old I had excruciatingly bad anxiety attacks think I’m going to pass out bad!

They eased for a while then I had Christmas and the most stressful January still not too bad attacks, however this month they have been crippling I can count on one hand the days I’ve not had them, how I’ve taken the kids to school daily is nothing short of a miracle! I’m proud of myself but I know deep down this cannot carry on dr booked for Tuesday!

Ive recieved a phone call at 7.15pm! Advising me that the deaf society wants to come around on Thursday morning! The trouble is, is alot of January consisted of FAR too many appointments with 2 sen children non verbal one on a ehc plan another heading that way mental capacity below half there age, one under audiology but thankfully not deaf.

I mean I agreed to a ridiculous amount of appointments which for my own mh I should have spread out not cancelled! But definitely should have acknowledged I should of revised!

AIBU to fuck all family admin off at the moment until I get medicated?! It’s debilitating I come over all of a sudden like someone’s beat me on the head dizzy it’s awful I feel like dropping dead! I know what it is I had it at 18.

Aibu to postpone things only until I get better?

I also have social anxiety I can’t make real eye contact or hold conversations without getting in a spin! I’m really concerned it looks like I’m on drugs etc when I’m definitely not!!

I also work very hard with our family business btw so I’ve got quite a bit on my plate!

I feel like being kind to myself is crucial right now any advice is welcome I hate to cancel important appointments but I can’t describe how bad my anxiety really is!

First of all- are you okay? It sounds like you’ve had a crazy amount of things to deal with in such a short time and that’s bound to stress anyone out.

Do you have a supportive partner and family who can help lighten your load?

Definitely speaking to the gp is the right way to go. I think you need a proper rest before you have a breakdown and I know it’s not easy with children at home.

Can someone else deal with any appointments that come up? Cancel the Thursday one, if it’s not a priority thing just now then they can reschedule.

Excellent support from husband but our business is extremely busy he comes home to help at every opportunity but unfortunately even with him home the anxiety is still uncontrollable! He tried desperately to help running around getting my herbal remedies etc I’ve changed diet etc but I’m way past that think tremoring and feeling like I’m going to faint! Really bad xx

Could you phone your gp tomorrow and explain all
of this in the hope that they can get you and earlier appointment?

i was in tears after this mornings school run on the phone to the gp but because I’m not having intrusive thoughts or suicidal I’m not a priority x

That’s awful, I’m so sorry you couldn’t get through to them. I’d phone again tomorrow, I’d make a point of it’s getting worse and you need help now.
Do you have a health visitor you can contact? Mine was awful but when I said I was having trouble with my anxiety, she phoned straight awah.

Hi. I am a mum of a deaf child. Feel free to PM me.
Is it NDCs who want to come or is if the teacher of the deaf. Teacher of the deaf is an awesome resource. She can help massively.

111 option 2 is MH crisis team, call them

Ring the deaf society (I’m assuming it’s the children’s division?) and Rearrange the appointment for a time that suits you. They are there for you so will accommodate it.
But I did find them a massive help and it relieved my anxiety a lot by just having someone explain everything and tell me where I can get help, who does what, what’s expected. It’s not like an NHS doctor appointment… you won’t go to the bottom of the list! it’s just someone to put you in touch with other people who also want to help.
it sounds like you have a lot on your plate at the minute and they will understand

I’ve read up a lot on the subject to naturally cure myself ie healthy diet 20 minute walk a day running hands under cold water excercise I do everything nothing and I mean nothing is working I feel a absoloute shell of myself I really do! 🥺

I thought yesterday I will get cocky with it I WILL walk up the shop with the baby bumped into a old friend who stopped me for conversations it was all down hill from there I couldn’t focus on anything in the shop the entire way home I was in tears because I thought I’d faint and where would that leave my baby?! What a foolish cow for taking my baby with a anxiety disorder up the shop!

Yes I came to say this, call 111 and demand to speak to someone.

Also when your head is clear maybe think about kids? 6 is a lot and to even basically cope with that many you would surely need support and time out for yourself- do you have family/relatives near by that can step in for a bit? I have two and can't cope so I've no idea how you are managing, you sound like a complete hero and I hope people treat you as such!

Your doctor is booked for a week's time? In all honesty you need to be seen sooner. Can you speak to the health visitor?

Great idea. Well done for realising something isn't right OP

Thanks I don’t have suicidal tendencies or intrusive thoughts but this anxiety is debilitating! Symptom wise I don’t understand I’m 6 months down the line very healthy happy relationship it doesn’t make any sense xx

Awes thanks lovely I’m no super hero but I have three much older three much younger! So ot isn’t one after the other etc I’m definitely suffering with post partum anxiety I recognise that xxx

I don’t as I signed off health visitors relatively quickly as I’ve always coped very well! What a idiot I couldn’t of seen this coming though xxx

I have every opportunity but because my anxiety I simply cannot do it! I’m offered lots of free time! It’s not that simple xxx

Sorry I don’t want to drop feed I get a hell of a lot of support and time to myself when ever I want! I really cannot do it because of my severe anxiety symptoms! My husband only dropped me off on Sunday for a bit of “me time” I rang him hysterical to come and get me. That’s not the issue xxx

OP, could you possibly afford an online Drs appointment? They can send prescriptions direct to your local pharmacy. Linked Bupa below but google will give you lots of options.

https://www.bupa.co.uk/health/payg/remote-gp?pdg_channel=ppc&pdg_account=gp&pdg_network=GOOGLE&pdg_campaign=GP+%7C+Remote+%7C+Generic&pdg_adgroup=Remote+%7C+Generic&pdg_keyword=online+doctors+appointment&gad_source=1&gclid=CjwKCAiAuNGuBhAkEiwAGId4ahpTQmIQceA85eV3jMyqVj_LnG7SS_J7S15Vo3NCqJpAN6uxXProzRoCnnsQAvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds

OP it sounds like you have a lot going on and trying to cope and process it all on your own is very hard. I have 2 young children one with similar to what your dealing with and my other with their own challenges and I suffer anxiety from that so can only imagine how much worse yours is. As others have said reach out to the HV team as they can help you and put you in contact with support groups and 1 to 1 as well as 111 tonight for immediate help.
Sending you the biggest hug. You're doing amazing even though I can well imagine you feel like your drowning some days. 🫂🫂
Keep talking on here as well for support.

I could afford that yes tbh I don’t have any financial worries I didn’t know that existed il look into it thanks very much x

I understand. I have 5 dc between age 17 and 9. They all have special needs, including my 10 year old who is mildly deaf. When appointments get overwhelming I categorise them into red appointments, yellow appointments and green appointments. The red ones are the urgent ones that you move everything else around for, the yellow ones aren't urgent but you don't want to put them off for long and the green ones can be fitted in whenever. I found it really helpful to organise things with multiple professionals who all thought their appointments were the most important ones. Also don't be afraid to set aside one day a week when you don't have any appointments.

Thanks darling hell of a struggle I hope your ok To my Nan randomly died out of nowhere aswell early jan previously I agreed to every appointment! So I felt o couldn’t rearrange when I should of said “no” I love my family my husband they are great support but I don’t want them here accept my husband it makes me more anxious?! Xxx

Have you had any input this far from a teacher of the Deaf or audiology?

Bludy hell what a excellent idea? I never thought of that! I need to start saying NO to a lot of non beneficial appointments also! Hope your ok too it’s very hard! My 5yo is doing exceptionally now he has his one on one but my 3yo I’m getting called in left right and centre to get her attacking also she’s a headbanger! Horrible x

Just to clarify my panic attacks started before I knew baby was deaf but they ramped up a bit further thanks for your support xxx