Friend forged her mother's will

[Beautynamechange]

I have recently learnt that my friend who I have known since forever forged her late mother's will.

I don't want to go into too much detail about how I learnt this as it will be too outing.

It was nearly 4 years ago when her mother was most vulnerable on her death bed little over a week before she passed. There was another will put in place for around 20 years before this new will and that previous will was destroyed by my friend. Both wills were made at home.

It has nothing to do with me, but my friend took advantage of her dying mother, and now I feel different towards her because of this. I am supposed to be her bridesmaid at her wedding in a few months and I cannot get past how someone could do that for her own advantage. I have known this friend since nursery. We are both late 20's now.

Is it wrong of me to feel different about my friend? I understand this has nothing to do with me but it's the fact she has done it. How cruel towards her other family members.

I know of someone who did this a few days before their mother passed.. he got everything.. how it was never contested I don’t know.

I mean he has always been money mad, but this is the lowest of the low, absolute greed at its worst.

A friend had been through probate several times in the three years before her death. Widowed and childless, she doted on her dogs and their happiness was foremost in her mind.
When she died unexpectedly, her mother and father searched the house and were tragically unable to locate the will. Luckily, as next of kin, her mother inherited everything and because the dogs missed her so much, they were PTS.
There wasn't even a funeral held.

Firstly, is this something she told you herself or is it hearsay?

If she did tell you herself, it would on whether the changes were reasonable, bearing in mind the situation at the time.

It would also depend on the mother’s state of mind.

For all we know, her mum might have left everything to her brother and it was changed to give her an equal amount, given she was caring for her mum at the end of her life.

Obviously if it was originally an even split between her and her siblings and she convinced her mum to leave it all to her, that would be selfish, even if she was the only one caring for her mum at the end and felt she could justify it on those grounds.

So my answer is, it depends. No, I wouldn’t necessarily ditch this friend. It depends what she actually did.

Actually, you said forged. If she actually did that, it’s different.

If the old lady was compos mentis and your friend persuaded her to sign it without undue presssure, then that’s different. I was assuming the latter until I reread your original.

I had to end a friendship recently, I was heartbroken, but had to tell him that I couldn't un-know what I knew. I wonder if you're in a similar situation.

If she can do that to her own family, think of what she could do to you. Don't wait around to find out. Get rid ASAP. She is obviously very devious and not to be trusted.

This is the kind of think I unfortunately can see my brother doing,when my mum passes 😔He's very money orientated and has massive debts. We are NC too.

Wow . I’m assuming she changed massively the Will ? Has anyone been badly affected by this ?

This.

I couldn't get past something like that, OP. How could you ever trust her?

Are you sure the person who told you isn't lying? I know you want to keep that off the thread, but was there evidence? For example, did she put you down as a witness, so you know it's fraudulent? Or could it be a family member who is angry about not getting as much as they expected and making up lies?

If you're sure, I think you need to speak to her. God, I really couldn't imagine having to go through the farce of being a bridesmaid with that information in your head!

Nope, I couldn't get past this. It would be friendship over.

Out of interest - how did she forge it? Did she cut out siblings in favour of herself?

Were there mitigating circumstances? Or just pure greed? I know somebody who did not carry out the deceased will to the letter of the will but when they explained why I totally understood and would have done the same in their situation…

There are no mitigating circumstances. It's illegal.

OP, go to the police. Now. Do not wait until after the wedding.

In what way did she alter the will - how did she benefit over others?

I’ve been in a similar situation (not as the benefactor). It’s incredible how people change when money is involved.

The guilt will eat her up eventually unless she’s as cold as ice and doesn’t care. If that’s the case she was never friendship material in the first place.

Not a chance I could ignore this!
I’d be telling her to make it right (how she would even start to do this, I don’t know) and that you aren’t sure how the friendship can continue knowing what you know about this if she refuses to sort it

Sorry, but she isn’t the person you thought you knew OP

I think this is disgusting and I’m afraid I would have to say something to other family members. I am struggling with the fact you are trying to move past something so deceitful and disgusting, not sure I would want to be friends with someone like that.

I couldn't ignore this , its the persons wishes , their choice , no matter what the circumstances , and should never be disregarded , They'll have had good reason , Please follow through on this , Family members may feel mum didn't care and thats so sad

My siblings did something similar to make sure I got absolutely nothing in dm’s will - it was an utterly horrendous time. They all just turned against me and dm was manipulated by them. I ended up needing therapy as was so upset for months. I didn’t contest it as had legal advice and I wouldn’t have won. I had to just accept it and wrote them off as shit people and went NC. A few years after one of my sisters was extremely unwell and wider family all pressured me to be checked to see if I could be a living donor for her, she even contacted me herself to beg which was awful 😞 (I said no which was hard as I’m not an unkind person but they had treated me as if I was worthless)

Why are you still her friend??

Pity you couldn't report this.

I'd report her to the police. No way I'd want to be her friend.

I found out a friend has been fraudulent about being a single mother and I was so disgusted I couldn't get past it. She pretended her partner had left to get a council house, when he was in fact always on the scene.

I know housing is difficult, but jumping the queue above more needy cases, and pretending to be in need when in fact you're not, just makes it harder for people who are actually in need.

I couldn't get past it and so distanced myself. It was sad, because she was nice in other ways. I see her on Facebook and they look very wealthy and successful now, always going on expensive holidays. I wonder how many single parents there are somewhere on the bottom rung of the housing ladder or worse.😥

It didn't help that she moaned about it, the state it had been left in, when she didn't work at all. I was struggling in a tiny private flat, working all the hours God sends, whilst putting my kids in childcare. This was 20 years ago when things were a lot different and benefits were presumably more generous.

Being friends is based on various things. Having different interests is fine. Different backgrounds is fine. But morals is usually a deal breaker. I could no longer be friends with someone who morally had such low and deceitful intentions. Move on.