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So what do we do? We’re all in the doghouse!

708 replies

Turnbacknowbeforeitstoolate · 13/02/2024 16:54

Names have been changed to protect the innocent and deranged alike.
currently sat in my living room with two drunk men and a damp spaniel who are refusing to leave or answer their phones and it’s all my fault…
The background is that DP and I have been together some years now and he comes from a pretty well to do British home with two eccentric parents and one thoroughly batshit sister. We’ll call the sister ‘Tilly’ and she is the catalyst of all chaos and is the main character in all family dramas.
DP and I both work in the arts and are very well versed in the ways of the drama queen and the ego fiend and are very good at handling hard work people so we muddle along with Tilly and do our best to include her. FIL is ex military and bloody hilarious at times, a bit old fashioned but overall pleasant.
MIL is an extremely overprotective and epitomises the bored middle class housewife and frankly it’s a shame they stopped giving out Valium on the NHS a couple decades ago because she’d benefit somewhat.
Tilly has never had a job or been to university or even attended a drs appointment on her own, partly due to a weird codependent relationship with MIL, partly due the fact that she has the IQ of a Jaffa Cake. She is very skilled at spending FIL’s money and manipulating people so that she enjoys the lifestyle of low ranking royal , she gets chauffeured about and likes shopping and occasionally will offer up a bit of volunteer work so she can post about it on social media with her latest fashion purchases carefully shoehorned into the frame.
MIL had an event today at the house, I won’t name the organisation but it’s very ‘jam and Jerusalem’ and she is highly respected in this organisation so wanted Tilly, FIL and the dog out of the house so she could go full ‘hostess with the mostest’ and be sure there’d be no tantrums or humping or farting or whatever Tilly and FIL and the dog might have done to cramp her style…
so the day was engineered that FIL and DP would take the dog to the groomers, leave him there, wander around the shops and get some new shirts for FIL and I would take Tilly with me to a work thing (that I really didn’t want to) but I’m happy to do my bit. Tilly has behaved like an absolute cockwomble all day, she has complained about everything, offended my colleagues and friends and embarrassed me profusely because for once she was not the centre of the universe and none of these people were responding to her Disney Princess energy. I have spoken to her several times about her tone and what she’s saying and literally begged her to behave. In the end I’d had enough and left her outside a pub.
I walked home and poured myself a large glass of wine and waited for the shit to hit the fan.
I text DP and told him and he said he was on his way home. I was pleased. A few minutes later , two very drunk and very wet gentlemen and a bemused spaniel appear in my kitchen. I’m just drying the dog when FIL’s phone rings, it’s MIL he puts her on speakerphone…
she is nothing short of apoplectic, SIL apparently had to ride the train the full 5 stops home alone ( the horror!) has soaking wet hair ( thoughts and prayers) and burst into MILs meeting sobbing and hyperventilating and then for the crescendo, threw herself onto the floor and pretended to be sick. MIL has had to put her to bed and I quote ‘forgot to serve the canapés’ because of the drama.
pissed FIL and DP ( yes they went to the pub rather than shopping) have simply howled with laughter into the phone and hung up. my name is now of course mud with MIL and SIL and I have the rest of the family holding up at mine because FIL ignored missed calls from TIlly which is why she had to travel home in the rain and is now on her deathbed.

OP posts:
Gonnagetgoingreturnsagain · 15/02/2024 10:35

Sauvblanctime · 15/02/2024 10:12

Leicester! And Birmingham, godskitchen.

but also Leeds for sundissential etc

I remember 007’s as well, never had doves. Remember Callie’s though!

Ahhh. Well my best friend from Coventry went clubbing in Birmingham mostly Gods Kitchen and Miss Moneypenny's before moving to London in her early/mid 20s. Me and some friends did return to both those club nights with her for the odd one!

OMG, yes, 007s... excellent. I remember white callies, but preferred the pink ones! Doves were more rave scene - late 80s/90s. But we still had Doves. It's a wonder I'm still alive honestly!

Sauvblanctime · 15/02/2024 10:57

Gonnagetgoingreturnsagain · 15/02/2024 10:35

Ahhh. Well my best friend from Coventry went clubbing in Birmingham mostly Gods Kitchen and Miss Moneypenny's before moving to London in her early/mid 20s. Me and some friends did return to both those club nights with her for the odd one!

OMG, yes, 007s... excellent. I remember white callies, but preferred the pink ones! Doves were more rave scene - late 80s/90s. But we still had Doves. It's a wonder I'm still alive honestly!

Hahaha same!! Some of the dubious afters and combos of class A’s 🤣

fun times though, still have a lot of my raving friends ❤️

Turnbacknowbeforeitstoolate · 15/02/2024 11:01

Loving the way this thread has meandered through the derail spectrum and we’re now talking about pills 🤣 I’ve never felt so among my people. It’s like there’s a whole hidden subculture of ravers that are now boring ordinary people that just couldn’t wait to reconnect with the club culture. Hell I’ve the delayed hangover of the century now having medicated yesterdays misery away with Pinot and have to prepare a presentation for tomorrow. I’m sitting infront of a PowerPoint with the biggest smile on my face! 🤣

OP posts:
Gonnagetgoingreturnsagain · 15/02/2024 11:11

Turnbacknowbeforeitstoolate · 15/02/2024 11:01

Loving the way this thread has meandered through the derail spectrum and we’re now talking about pills 🤣 I’ve never felt so among my people. It’s like there’s a whole hidden subculture of ravers that are now boring ordinary people that just couldn’t wait to reconnect with the club culture. Hell I’ve the delayed hangover of the century now having medicated yesterdays misery away with Pinot and have to prepare a presentation for tomorrow. I’m sitting infront of a PowerPoint with the biggest smile on my face! 🤣

Glad it's cheered you up a bit! I was never really a raver though went to one or two, Moon Dance, One Nation - left that all to my younger brother!

But from early mid 90s to 2000s I was a proper clubber, can't quite do the maths re dates but was about 24 when I started and 27 when I officially/unofficially stopped. I did still club from 27 onwards for 2-3 years with my then boyfriend including in one very dodgy club in Prague where we went and had E's! Went to Copenhagen and got weed and a hash brownie cookie for me as I didn't smoke from the neo Nazi looking types in Christiana (the hippy commune part of the city). We went there by bus and wasn't sure we were in the right place and when we got off the bus thought we were lost until boyfriend looked at one guy smoking a spliff and stoned and said to me "oh it's over there!". And it was. WinkDid have the odd 2-3 month break from it... I had a brilliant time though and met a couple of boyfriends and good mates from it. Sadly no more - I do sort of know the mates but times and things have changed. Various reasons.

But the beauty of E (add in coke etc too, Wink) was that everyone loved each other, you made friends, hugged etc. I'm not saying we were all friends 24/7 because there were some spats - but you can't be angry with someone when you're on a high! In fact when I see photos of people clubbing and obvs E'd up in 2000s - Spice Girls time they all look so bloody happy! We did also do the odd trip too but that for me was very much a once a year if that thing. My DB used to deal trips at 15 see... Have had many memories of coming home at 17/18 from work and seeing DB and his mates not wanting to cross DM's newly varnished wooden floors as it looked like water! And then with Gulf War they were all sitting in front of the TV watching soldiers and gunfire in a drug induced haze saying 'we're all gonna die!' and I had to get to work so I just shrugged and went upstairs to bed or laughed at them! DB was also really into and his fave film back then was Jacobs Ladder. Say no more.

My drink of choice back then was Sea Breeze, vodka and cranberry juice or Vodka and Red Bull which I used to have to force myself to drink as I hated red bull but wanted to stay awake! Add on Tequila but I also became a bottled water connoisseur!

@Sauvblanctime I still have some of my raving friends too actually more DB's and two of the blokes are now in Spain and Thailand respectively! The girls sadly we have long lost touch with! I can name some names one girl was lovely and her dad owned the local basement wine bar/restaurant we all used to hang out in when not at raves/clubs!

Sauvblanctime · 15/02/2024 11:14

Turnbacknowbeforeitstoolate · 15/02/2024 11:01

Loving the way this thread has meandered through the derail spectrum and we’re now talking about pills 🤣 I’ve never felt so among my people. It’s like there’s a whole hidden subculture of ravers that are now boring ordinary people that just couldn’t wait to reconnect with the club culture. Hell I’ve the delayed hangover of the century now having medicated yesterdays misery away with Pinot and have to prepare a presentation for tomorrow. I’m sitting infront of a PowerPoint with the biggest smile on my face! 🤣

Haha standard! It was the good old days, and life was free & easy! No stresses, no kids, just the music! X

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 15/02/2024 14:40

Calliopespa · 14/02/2024 19:56

Indeed it was. And the decision left them zero rated so that Jaffa cake lovers could rejoice. But more importantly the quintessential feature of a biscuit ought really to be its crispness. The word itself comes from the french meaning twice cooked ( they were baked first then moved to a cooler oven to crisp or something like that.) The moisture content of cake is higher. Jaffa cakes have Genoise sponge everyone knows should not be crisp but … well, spongy. But the ageing thing I especially liked. The big question is where would it leave American style cookies? I think the answer has to be cake! ( moist, not crisp and go hard not soft as they age).

Edited

@Calliopespa - I was wondering about American cookies too.

Re: different Jaffa cake flavours - am I hallucinating, or have there been cherry ones as well as raspberry ones?

@Turnbacknowbeforeitstoolate - your wedding plan sounds wonderful! You will need to take some Jaffa cakes out with you, though - as part of the wedding feast.

I can feel my waistline expanding just at the thought of cherry Jaffa cakes - I am on the 5:2 diet at the moment, and today is one of the days where I eat next to nothing until dinner - so this thread is making me ravenous too! I may have to go and eat a carrot. 😂😂😂Actually, after many years of painstaking cake and biscuit research, it is more of an equator than a waistline.

PandaChopChop · 15/02/2024 16:42

Gonnagetgoingreturnsagain · 15/02/2024 09:53

Hang on - have they changed Bacardi Breezers? No longer in the bottles?

Can't get bottles (or the flavours that were in the bottles) in the UK anymore. One of the many things I love about Europe 🫤
They do cans now but they are wierd flavours and NOT. THE. SAME.

Branwells77 · 15/02/2024 18:12

@Turnbacknowbeforeitstoolate
You have made my day this post is brilliant
I hope you joined in the fun and got extremely drunk and sent drunk selfies to the MIL & SIL that’s if SIL made it through the night of course after her horrendous time of getting the train and getting wet 😁

Ohyeahwaitaminute · 15/02/2024 21:20

Continuing on the dance/rave convo, I’ve recently joined a large local group of girls who are still raving in their 30s, 40s, 50s and beyond.

A lot of the clubs now do daytime stuff, so we get the train up to London on a Saturday morning, have a nice lunch together, dance and drink our way until about 9.30 then catch the last train home. Married, unmarried, grandmothers, straight, gay… all ages.

Printworks, Ministry of Sound… We go to Brighton and other summer festivals too.

If there’s anyone in the west Surrey/ Hants border who’s interested, PM me.

@Turnbacknowbeforeitstoolate You have a great way of telling your story. Keep it up! 🤣

Gonnagetgoingreturnsagain · 15/02/2024 21:31

Ohyeahwaitaminute · 15/02/2024 21:20

Continuing on the dance/rave convo, I’ve recently joined a large local group of girls who are still raving in their 30s, 40s, 50s and beyond.

A lot of the clubs now do daytime stuff, so we get the train up to London on a Saturday morning, have a nice lunch together, dance and drink our way until about 9.30 then catch the last train home. Married, unmarried, grandmothers, straight, gay… all ages.

Printworks, Ministry of Sound… We go to Brighton and other summer festivals too.

If there’s anyone in the west Surrey/ Hants border who’s interested, PM me.

@Turnbacknowbeforeitstoolate You have a great way of telling your story. Keep it up! 🤣

I’m not in west Surrey but can meet you in central London if you like!

angsanana · 15/02/2024 21:36

YAB VVVV unreasonable for not sharing more stories about tilly. There's more to this story OP. Spill...... we're all invested now 🤣

NotARealWookiie · 15/02/2024 21:42

Re Jaffa cakes.

M&S were selling MANGO flavour last year.

I bought some and DH nearly divorced me on principle.

Helplessandheartbroke · 15/02/2024 22:22

NotARealWookiie · 15/02/2024 21:42

Re Jaffa cakes.

M&S were selling MANGO flavour last year.

I bought some and DH nearly divorced me on principle.

I don't blame him!!!! How dare they try different flavours. Its like buying an orange flavoured baileys!!!! Ffs don't do it

MissPeachyKeen · 15/02/2024 22:46

NotARealWookiie · 15/02/2024 21:42

Re Jaffa cakes.

M&S were selling MANGO flavour last year.

I bought some and DH nearly divorced me on principle.

Yeh I would too!

@Ohyeahwaitaminute I totally missed out on raves in my 20s & would be so up for that!

Stressedoutmammy · 16/02/2024 08:01

Grab yourself another wine and your laptop and start writing books, this is hilarious!

Blondebrunette1 · 16/02/2024 11:30

Hilarious! I needed that pick me up today. Hope you're forgiven quickly but mostly that MIL gets a grip and realises she needs to get real about her adult daughter being so intolerably childish and disrespectful to everyone. Not your burden to bare.

Mrsmouse71 · 16/02/2024 12:46

Poor poor Tilly 🤣🤣🤣

Dovewings · 16/02/2024 12:56

Please write a book about them.

BestZebbie · 16/02/2024 13:19

I would love to read this thread as a Jane Austen book, I feel the whole scenario would translate extremely well.

TheNoonBell · 16/02/2024 13:22

A masterpiece. Thanks very much!

butterpuffed · 16/02/2024 13:41

Turnbacknowbeforeitstoolate · 15/02/2024 03:19

@Vergeofbreakdown23 Im literally the worst friend on the planet. Not because I’m an arsehole or I don’t care, the combination of me being profoundly disorganised and in a constant state of hyper stress mode and my profession which means I’m further stressed and borderline psychotic and hallucinating from fatigue because we don’t sleep enough when we’re working … but I genuinely don’t have any friends really, so if you don’t mind being ignored for days and then trauma dumped on on the regs, and texted in the wee hours… inbox me 🤣 are you local? 🤣

My cat used to hate my dog as well . If the dog dared to try and have a sleep in her own bed , the cat would go up to the bed and stare at the dog until she vacated . Said cat would then jump in and settle down with what we always assumed to be a smug grin on her face .

butterpuffed · 16/02/2024 13:43

Quoted the wrong post of OP's !!!

TeaGinandFags · 16/02/2024 14:51

You could get a publishing deal with that!

Is there going to be a sequel?

Shetlands · 16/02/2024 15:04

I'd happily send you a crate of wine to oil the wheels of your splendid recounts of life with Tilly.

AvaBates · 16/02/2024 15:04

To be fair to MIL she has to put up with this all the time & this is probably the reason she’s halfway to the loony bin. In her defence she’s made plans, with family, to look after her daughter in law.
Id play the bigger person here, no one is in the wrong but I’d still be round there with a bunch of flowers taking the contrite route. Next time your other half needs to take joint responsibility for his sister if you have to look after her. You live & learn!

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