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AIBU?

To think that this comment was really childish?

53 replies

empee47 · 08/02/2024 22:11

Met up with another school mum friend in the pub last week for a few drinks. Half an hour later, another group of school mums arrived so they’d obviously planned a night out together which neither my friend nor I had been invited on. Fair enough, we didn’t invite them on ours. The queen bee of the group passed by our table on her way to bar and said ‘didn’t expect to see you two here’ and throughout evening was looking over at us and laughing. We’re not the cool crowd, who decides that anyway, just two friends having a drink. Why do adults behave like this?

OP posts:

Am I being unreasonable?

217 votes. Final results.

POLL
You are being unreasonable
19%
You are NOT being unreasonable
81%
cottontail24 · 08/02/2024 22:13

Some people never really make it out of the playground mentality.

chantelion · 08/02/2024 22:14

Yanbu, very childish and bitchy. Leave them to it op. Guarantee that group is the type who fall out with each other all the time too.

Woodenwonder · 08/02/2024 22:15

You're obviously two different sets of people who didn't invite each other, further than that I can only surmise you were looking over as well long enough to see them looking at you and vice versa. It's not worth stewing over really ☺️

Snugglemonkey · 08/02/2024 22:15

Because they have very sad lives and really nothing else to boost their super fragile self esteem

RawBloomers · 08/02/2024 22:17

She didn't ignore you, she approached you and gave you an opening to chat if you'd wanted to. Calling adult women "Queen Bee" sounds more childish.

What exactly do you want from them?

QueenBean22 · 08/02/2024 22:18

I’m so glad the cliquey group are behind me now. 7 years of primary is a long time to to feel excluded and just not cool enough.

Does your child play with theirs?

WonderfulUsername · 08/02/2024 22:19

I genuinely can't see anything wrong with what she said?

If they really were looking over at you and laughing then yes, that is childish and nasty though.

Acapulco12 · 08/02/2024 22:20

I’d find that annoying too OP. The ‘Queen Bee’ you’ve mentioned here is making me picture Amanda from Motherland (BBC sitcom about families/parenting). Don’t know if you’ve seen it, but I recommend it if you haven’t 🤣🤣

NewPinkJacket · 08/02/2024 22:22

RawBloomers · 08/02/2024 22:17

She didn't ignore you, she approached you and gave you an opening to chat if you'd wanted to. Calling adult women "Queen Bee" sounds more childish.

What exactly do you want from them?

I was just about to say I get fed up of the misogynistic use of 'queen bee' on here.

No-one calls a man a 'king bee'. What would he be called?

Probably 'the group leader' or something.

Superduper02 · 08/02/2024 22:25

What does her comment even mean? Didn't expect you to get out much? Didn't expect you to like the same pub as us? Didn't expect you to have friends? Just a illogical comment

TheSnowyOwl · 08/02/2024 22:28

You sound as bad as each other. You don’t get on. That’s fine. You don’t have to. Just get on with your lives and stop making issues with others.

RainbowsAndSkittles · 08/02/2024 22:31

Acapulco12 · 08/02/2024 22:20

I’d find that annoying too OP. The ‘Queen Bee’ you’ve mentioned here is making me picture Amanda from Motherland (BBC sitcom about families/parenting). Don’t know if you’ve seen it, but I recommend it if you haven’t 🤣🤣

Edited

I had the exact same thought 🤣

Shadowsindarkplaces · 08/02/2024 22:32

The playground follows us all as we grow up, workplace, parenting, clubs, sports, none of it escapes this type of clique behaviour. The secret is not giving them any satisfaction in sniping.

MorningMinion · 08/02/2024 22:34

This seems like the ultimate non-event. Two different groups of people who know one another from having children at the same school coincide unexpectedly at the same venue at night and have a brief exchange.

KrisAkabusi · 08/02/2024 22:47

You wouldn't have seen her looking at you if you hadn't been looking at her. You're choosing to be offended by an innocuous comment. But most importantly, you seem to care what she thinks. Grow up and ignore her.

OhBumBags · 08/02/2024 22:50

MorningMinion · 08/02/2024 22:34

This seems like the ultimate non-event. Two different groups of people who know one another from having children at the same school coincide unexpectedly at the same venue at night and have a brief exchange.

This is what I think too.

Plus why would anyone invite someone along who has such a low opinion of the group anyway?

'Queen bee' and 'cool crowd'? It sounds as though the OP doesn't like them, yet feels entitled to be included in their company just because their kids are educated in the same place.

doilooklikeicare · 08/02/2024 22:50

MorningMinion · 08/02/2024 22:34

This seems like the ultimate non-event. Two different groups of people who know one another from having children at the same school coincide unexpectedly at the same venue at night and have a brief exchange.

This

Copperoliverbear · 08/02/2024 22:51

Because they're very sad and up their own arses, most of the people in the group probably don't even like them, but are such sados themselves because they're frightened not to be in with the in crowd.

WonderfulUsername · 08/02/2024 22:53

Copperoliverbear · 08/02/2024 22:51

Because they're very sad and up their own arses, most of the people in the group probably don't even like them, but are such sados themselves because they're frightened not to be in with the in crowd.

Or they're just a group of women having a nice night out together.

JackieO22 · 08/02/2024 22:54

They sound like a bunch of cows.-. You had a lucky escape I'd say, and they're only 'cool' in their own little group,.meaningless to anyone else.

thankyouforthedayz · 08/02/2024 22:57

I don't think there's anything wrong with what she said. It was just small talk. I might say something like this myself as a friendly opener and would mean nothing ill by it. Are you sure you aren't projecting your feelings on to her?

defiant2024 · 08/02/2024 23:01

Assuming she hoped to upset you, you've given her what she wanted.

HawkersEast · 08/02/2024 23:03

YABU. Very childish all around.

WonderfulUsername · 08/02/2024 23:09

I do wish the OP would come back and elaborate.

She hasn't said why she thinks ‘didn’t expect to see you two here’, as the woman walked by to the bar is childish?

If the woman didn't say anything, I imagine the OP would be annoyed at being 'ignored'.

Ktime · 08/02/2024 23:13

WonderfulUsername · 08/02/2024 23:09

I do wish the OP would come back and elaborate.

She hasn't said why she thinks ‘didn’t expect to see you two here’, as the woman walked by to the bar is childish?

If the woman didn't say anything, I imagine the OP would be annoyed at being 'ignored'.

I think if you see someone you know, saying 'hello, good to see you' is much nicer than 'didn’t expect to see you two here' and walking off. Is that something you would do?

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