Hours issues at work due to childcare

[SuzieQ2024]

Hello lovely ladies! Have been a Mumsnet lurker for years and really appreciate the common sense and sisterhood of the posts through infertility, new motherhood etc. So here goes my first one!

Basically I have Mon to Thurs childcare at nursery all year. Fridays I have preschool 9-3 in term-time. I've had issues with workplaces saying they are flexible, it will be fine, and then saying it's not fine/complaining. I 100% absolutely understand the importance of having things in writing but they often won't do this, citing not fair on rest of team.

I've started a new job, still on probation. I couldn't have been clearer about my childcare, work in admin, and can always catch up in evening/weekend if needed. Issue is this was verbal, they wouldn't put it in contract. Now they say I have to take leave on Fridays out of term time, won't let me take unpaid leave as this needs to be in blocks, and are extending my probation because of this to see if it suits the business needs of the team. AIBU to think that this is unfair? I understand that they will have clauses to justify such things. Any similar experiences? Thanks in advance and best wishes to all X

I am a bit thick but I don't get it?

@SuzieQ2024 what do you think work have verbally agreed to? That you do a 5 day week in term time and 4 day week in school holidays?

Hiya, so that out of term I would work longer Mon to Thurs, work as I can on a Fri and make up Fri evening and weekend. The type of job I do that is possible and Fridays are quiet. Noone would be covering and I would always answer any urgent call or email. But hey ho that's not happening now 😉

You need to formalise what hours you do work on a Friday, i.e., 9.30-2.30 Friday and X-X Mon - Thurs, so it’s all above board and transparent.
I do feel for you re childcare, but making up hrs in a vague way at an unspecified time is really hard to manage as a manager and what if everyone wanted to do it.

Also nobody would ever cover, I would always be on email just FYI thanks
I think this might the sticking point.

In my experience people (bosses and colleagues) like clarity.

For example if the whole company has core hours from 9.30-3 and then it's up to employees to make up the rest of their hours as required then nobody's going to be arsey if someone signs in at 9.25 because it's expected that people have a soft start.

If another company has a big lunch window that's 11.30-1.30 and people can be absent within that window as it's convenient to them, it's fine that someone isn't on teams at 11.45.

If someone takes annual leave in the school holidays one day a week then everyone knows that colleague is off and their work will either be reallocated that day or they'll pick it up their next working day.

If another colleague formally compresses their hours then nobody's expecting them in on a Thursday because they do 5 days compressed into 4.

In your proposed situation it's quite vague so you're at work and being paid to be at work, but not properly working and you'll be on email, and you might or might not be free depending on what your child needs.

I suspect if you went to work and proposed having DC in holiday club for the Friday mornings and you could compress your afternoon hours into your 4 other days, they might be open to it. Or maybe there's the option to build up some TOIL that you take each Friday in the holidays. They sound flexible, just not open to impractical arrangements.

No you’re not being unreasonable. When I returned to work my new employer had it written in my contract that I would be part time up until the term after her third birthday when I would go full time. They had it in writing that on a certain day I would be unavailable for a few hours (nursery run) and work flexibly to make up those hours. If they wanted to do it they would have and I think you should look elsewhere for work! Big companies have the best policies IMO

If you have childcare for 4 days is that nursery? Can you ask them if there's room to take your child for 5 days?

They have a business to run, and it’s not their problem you dont have childcare in the holidays, so basically you need to find some, or ask to reduce hours to Monday to Thursday yearround and see if they accept that

Your childcare issue is your problem, not the businesses

If the company isn't one that works with school terms then I understand why they just want an all year round pattern

I might have missed this, but assuming you don't have a partner or you would at least be sharing the early finish times and Fridays in school holidays ?

It's worth bearing in mind that parental leave can be postponed. Not declined... But postponing might as well be a decline sometimes!

If you wanted, say 2 weeks off in August but it's a super popular holiday time, your employer can postpone until September, for example.

Thanks all and thanks Moggi x