To give DD less money for lunch

[Justrolledmyeyesoutloud]

She is in year 7, takes a very basic packed lunch (filled roll, apple and a chocolate bar or cake), also has £10 on Parentpay to buy a drink and extras.
Found her roll in her bag uneaten so will have to throw it out. She bought herself a bacon roll and some waffles today.
Just had a chat with her about making good choices but don't want to food shame her.
Any advice? As l am writing this, am thinking £2 a day is too much on top of a packed lunch. Should l reduce it to £5?

Why don’t you get her to sort her own pack lunch? Maybe this will be more appealing.

I did just suggest that to her actually x

Why not just ditch the packed lunch?

Packed lunch or money for school lunch. Not both. And get her to make her own if it’s a packed lunch.

Do you mean £10 per week for extras? Check the prices for pupils in the school's canteen before you decide, but judging by what our canteen charges pupils (they don't pay VAT whereas us staff do), £10 per week on top of a roll/fruit and cake sounds a lot.

It's expensive having a school dinner every day and not healthy reqlly

We’ve had similar with DD, so frustrating. We’ve compromised that she takes a packed lunch a few times a week and buys other days. She gets to pick her packed lunch (so takes a mini bag of popcorn instead of crisps for example) and as long as she has a sensible meal she can get the extras she wants the other days. She’s also been told if she leaves her packed lunch the money for lunches / extras stops (we can see what she buys so would know if she’d binned it at school as she’d buy something else) as I can’t stand the waste. We do make sure we’ve upped veg and protein at home to balance her less good choices out.

I think I would rather my kids ate. I have boys who ate at break and lunch school so topped up to what they needed even if they took a sandwich. If your child isn't overweight and healthy and you can afford £10 a week, not sure why you would need to ration what they eat.

Let her have meals with the money and when it runs out she can switch to her own made lunchboxes.

I think eating crap for lunch is a classic high school/teen thing isn't it? I'd make sure her other meals are healthy, give her a budget and let her crack on. If she uses her budget up in the first few days she can take a packed lunch the rest of the week.

I'd be tempted to give her more lunch, and suggest that some days she doesn't take a packed lunch, and eats totally from the canteen.

FWIW, both mine take a sandwich, crisps, veg sticks, fruit and a biscuit. DS1 also takes a lump of cheese. He adds an extra cereal bar if he has PE. DS2 doesn't add to lunch, but often comes home and has a fried egg or an omelet, followed by fruit, followed by cake. And he isnt a teenager yet....

Could she have packed lunches everyday except Fridays? That’s what I used to do when I was in school. Spent all week looking forward to Fridays!!

Sounds like she could be bored of the basic packed lunch and wants to buy from the canteen?

Yes l think you are probably right.
I might try this out

I'm not rationing it - l ended up throwing food away today because she didn't want that and her canteen food

Have her shop for and make her own packed lunch

Why not make the £10 part of her pocket money. Basic pack lunch from home, extras from school or extras from the supermarket, or school lunch a couple of days and bring packed lunch other days. It will be her choice and no doubt she will learn to be be more economical.

I reckon it would be better to say only packed lunches Monday to Wednesday then use the £10 to only have school lunch on Thursday and Friday. She then gets to enjoy the school stuff 2 days a week but you don't get the wastage on other days

This post has made me chuckle as its reminded me about DS (now 25). He always took a packed lunch but had hollow legs. Lunch was gone at first break so I'd top up his canteen card in case he was going to 'die of hunger'.

One lunchtime, he apparently queued for half an hour (lunch was 45 mins) to order a panini. Got said panini and took it outside to sit with his mates. Just as he lifted the sandwich up to take a bite, a seagull swooped down and snatched the whole thing out of his hand.

It still makes me laugh thinking about it. He was so very furious when he got home!

So, no practical advice, OP, other than setting a monthly top up on the card (which I did). If they blow it all in the first couple of days, well, tough, basically. I always sent my DC off with a packed lunch so I knew they wouldn't starve.

My y7 makes herself a packed lunch most days and has input into the shopping list.

She was also spending about 12-15 a week on snacks/drinks. We've come up with an agreement that if she spends less than £7.50 we put £2.50 into her money pot, if she spends nothing we put £5 in. She's never got the £5 but has got the £2.50 every week this term. It is a win for us because that has halved the budget. I don't mind her having some snacks with her peers.

The numbers were randomly chosen as about half of what she was spending. She doesnt otherwise get regular pocket money, so she is pleased with this (though not yet spending it)

We do the same. Packed lunch and she supplements with extras from the canteen. She gets a full school meal on average once a week.

We upload an agreed amount of money each half term and when it’s gone, it’s gone. If she blows it in a week on biscuits then she has to have packed lunch until the next half term.

I did give her extra the last week before Christmas because she was shattered and it meant she didn’t need to make her lunches but other than that we’ve stuck to it.

She probably wants to do what her friends are doing, the novelty at this age. Mine stopped when had to deal with the queue every day

If shes got a packed lunch she doesnt need money for extras as well.

Dts get £20 a week. If they decide to spend it all on Radnor splash by Wednesday they can take what they forage from home.

I think on the food waste thing just tell her to be smart about it. If she sees something on the menu during the week to not take the packed lunch.