To think Social Media should be banned for under 16s

[Halfmanhalfcake]

Off the back of Esther Gheys campaigning about phone use and social media,
I was thinking how bonkers it is that we (as a society) haven't put in stricter controls over social media / internet use for kids yet.

It's as if the technology has developed too quickly, and parents have been left scrabbling around trying to control whatever they can, in what is essentially a completely unregulated cyber world.

I realise that some people are anti nanny-state, but imagine if CBBC started showing snuff films or porn in the middle of some teen drama. When mental health problems in children are soaring, and there is some evidence to show a link to phone / social media use, it seems totally nuts that regulation isn't being enforced at a higher level.

I see grown adults lose all perspective just from being on twitter, how on earth do we think kids can handle it better?

What benefit is it for children under 16 to be on social media? So they can do some tik-tok dance craze? If you want to do a dance just do it in your front room with your mates. To post posey-influencer style images at 13/14? For whose benefit?

I've heard people argue that its unrealistic to think that it can be changed now. Why? My kids are still young so maybe i dont understand.

Why 16? Children don't magically mature at 16. Social media addicts will always exist, it would be better if the sites themselves were made safer

No - parents should monitor what their children do.
My daughter (15 and autistic) would lose a lot of her friendship's and support (and enjoyment) if she didn't have access to social media.
Edit: she doesn't do any of that "influencer" type stuff. She finds that dull.

I agree, but my children are also young so haven’t been through this stage yet. The evidence is overwhelming now however that social media use is detrimental for many young people so action is needed.

How would you police it?

Not if she & friends never had it in the first place

Probably is correct but how would you enforce it?

Social media has plenty of benefits as well as downsides. What's needed is tighter controls and for parents to be aware of what their children are doing.

In the UK you can't legally buy a knife until you are 18. Has this stopped under 18 year olds carrying knives?

Agreed.

SM can be beneficial as well as detrimental. I've had 3 dc's going through school now. In many years checking phones I've had once something I've raised with the school (and they dealt with it - not to do with my dc btw), and 3-4 conversations to find out what's going on.
Mostly the conversations have been positive and, especially for my dd who is very shy, a really helpful way for her to engage with her peers and feel accepted.

It's also got advantages in that it's also evidence. So a child who is bullied with words at school, it can be hard if the bully says "just banter"/"misunderstood" or "I didn't say that" and everyone backs them. If you have words on a screenshot then it's harder to deny.

What it needs is for schools, and potentially the police, to take serious action on anything on texts etc, and for it to be encouraged for dc to come forward if there is something that makes them uncomfortable. Not allow them (as one local school does) to hide behind "oh we don't allow phones at school so it's nothing to do with us".

And it needs for perhaps in PSHE lessons one of the big tops being SM use. How it can effect people. Where to report if there's something that makes them uncomfortable. When to switch it off. How to ask for help. What not to do. How people can be effected. To think before posting.

You are not going to manage to ban it. I remember when secret FB accounts were the rage among pupils. Most of them admitted their parents didn't know they were on. How would you stop them?
And if you did stop them, what would happen? I'm sure between them they'd find a way.

We need to work with the technology, not against it.

It is unrealistic to go back to how it was. Phones and social media can be harmful like in Briannas case, and have terrible consequences. Many teens see things they shouldn't.

The risk of your child being socially isolated, bullied and missing out are just as likely, probably slightly more.

There middle ground us to monitor the phone usage. I'm not using my child as a Guinea pig.

A social media exodus would take a majority of parents to agree - which would also vastly decrease the appeal for social media as none of their friends use it. But it's not going to happen, so until then, it's not the answer.

This ^^

You can't shut the floodgates now.

Gambling sites have pretty strong age controls to be able to access them. Obviously some kids will get work arounds, but does that mean you shouldnt try?

We used to use fake-ids to get into nightclubs. Doesnt mean that the age limit of the night club should have been dropped.

Lots of people crying "but the kids would go crazy".....so?

Or maybe its not an age-limit to social media, but forcing the apps to comprehensively ban certain content, as someone above said. Briana Ghey was also accessing pro-anna sites, how have we allowed a world where kids who have eating disorders access content that glamorises their issues?

People have always had eating-disorders, but it would be like handing over a magazine to those people showing them how brilliant their anorexia is.

Children were murdering children before the internet even existed …

SM is neither the cause or consequence. Poor Mental Health services for your people, lack of SEND provision, lack of money in schools, poverty, an underfunded police force, a general lack of services is much more the blame. Much easier for the government to put it all back in Parents / Tech companies, than take any blame themselves

@DoIHaveNameRegret unfortunately as an autistic teen without social media/internet she would probably have a very lonely life.
It's how she has found her "tribe".

Oh sorry, now I realise you mean she has formed friendships from social media. That’s lovely for her

"My kids are still young so maybe i dont understand."

I think this is a very accurate statement.

My < 16 DS is very keen on PGo. We were out for almost 3 hours yesterday for Community Day. I only started playing 6 weeks ago, way to hang out and get my own dopamine fix.

DS only really got into PG when someone added him to the local groupChat so he could do the extras & social parts of the Game, call up people for Raids. His boss (DS has a regular job) is on the GroupChat & I have known the boss since before DS was born. Many ppl on there are age 30+.

But oh dear, the GroupChat is SM & OP says all SM for <16s is bad, woe alas calamity nuts catastrophise predators clutch the pearls, can't possibly be a good thing.... Besides, talking to people in person is never toxic, bullying, irrational, violent, horrible experience. Didn't happen before digital SM were invented.

I agree OP but like you, my kids are too young for SM and do not have phones. They do have tablets with strict controls on them and I'm dreading the teenage years as technology is advancing so quickly with various apps popping up I'm not sure how I'll ever keep myself up to date enough to completely keep them safe.

I do agree with others that maybe the horse has bolted and better management of the sites need to happen but it's scary the impact of porn alone on society and young people, let alone pro anorexia, guides of how to get hormones for children etc. I don't know what the answer is at all but something needs to happen.

@Megifer but wouldn't you welcome help with managing the content that your child is exposed to? I'm not saying ban phones, or even like esther ghey suggested, have kids phones ( I dont think thats realistic).

@DoIHaveNameRegret yes some are online friendships - which obviously we don't know 100% that the people are genuine but we (her parents) monitor her internet use and she knows when to tell us if things go inappropriate.
She then has her school friends who she chats to online, plays online Minecraft with them, shares daft memes etc.

Very true. I said on another thread some of the stills/snippets of Briannas videos were really provocative imo but probably accepted as ok by the mum as part of Brianna exploring Briannas identity.

I think tbf Briannas mum has acknowledged she could have done more?

Social media is like anything else: whether it's good or bad depends on how it's used.

My two got it at 13 so they could interact with far flung family. If they found anything that concerned them, they talked to me about it. Maybe parents should be more worried about why their teens feel they can't talk to them? Support, monitor, talk. Bans don't work, they just create more secrecy and mistrust.

I think the thing I find hard to understand, is the total lack of questioning about whether something / anything should be done introduce measures from a regulatory power. Its just the acceptance that "social media is here to stay so we should just deal with it", wihtout questioning if it could be better / safer / more appropriate.

It should be completely banned before the age of 16 with the exception of educational sites. Of course the internet does some good, but it definitely causes more harm than good overall to the younger generations whilst growing up.