Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

‘Teaching’ 6 year old about periods

91 replies

Adviceplease82 · 03/02/2024 18:13

I am a single mum and it is just myself and my son who is 6.
we are due to go on holiday soon and I will be on my period for some of this time. On the first day of my period I do not want to swim. I am incredibly heavy and just do not want to.
My initial thought was to be open with my son as to why, however a friend made me think twice saying she hadn’t yet spoken to her 8 year old daughter about this subject.
I am really open with him in general and would do it in an age appropriate way (or try to)
my thinking was/ is that I don’t see any harm in him knowing this is something females go through and I don’t need to make a big deal about it.
or am I unreasonable and is it inappropriate for him to learn some basics at his age?

OP posts:
SalmonWellington · 03/02/2024 18:15

YANBU

Dogdilemma2000 · 03/02/2024 18:16

It’s a normal body function. Nothing to be ashamed of. Explain it to him.

Umph · 03/02/2024 18:17

Why doesn’t he know about periods already seeing as he lives with you? It’s not shameful or anything. My 3 and 5 year olds understand basic anatomy, where periods come from and why, and what a menstrual cup/pads/tampons are.

scrivette · 03/02/2024 18:17

I think you can explain in an age related way. My six year old and slightly older son know that about once a month Mummy bleeds as it means that Mummy hasn't got a baby in her tummy. They know that it's not scary or painful and it's something that happens when girls are older.

Wolfpa · 03/02/2024 18:18

It’s fine that he knows the basics, it is not uncommon for an 8 year old to get her period so some basic knowledge would be good

IDontLoveTheWayYouLie · 03/02/2024 18:18

There's nothing wrong kids knowing about a period.

underneaththeash · 03/02/2024 18:19

I would just get some norethisterone (you can get it online rather than going to the drs) and delay your period. They do make you a little bit bloated on day 1 and 2, but then it settles down.

I did with mine (thankfully, I rarely have one now), each time we went on holiday. It seems a shame to miss a few days swimming, they love it at that age - and presumably you're going somewhere hot over half term which has cost a fortune.

If you really don't want to, I had told both of mine by that age that women who aren't pregnant bleed a bit every month and it's their bodies telling them that they're not pregnant. It's quite normal and doesn't hurt them.

Italiandreams · 03/02/2024 18:19

Mine have always known, they don’t believe in privacy on the toilet and I have always been open.

MoreDollies · 03/02/2024 18:20

I think honesty, in an age appropriate way, is the best policy. If there's any chance he could see any period blood for example, it would be better for him to know it's normal and not panicking that mummy is badly injured. We all know that going for a wee or more in private is a tall ask with little ones, it's more likely than not he'll intrude at the wrong time sooner than you might prefer

Mine are terribly heavy, like I can go through a massive nappy sized super towel in an hour and sometimes I get caught short. With the alternative having to do a waddle to get a towel, I have had to ask my son (7) if he will get me a "lady towel". He knows mummy isn't hurt and it's something that happens every month 🤷🏼‍♀️

sprigatito · 03/02/2024 18:21

Mine are boys and both of them knew all about periods and sex before they started school. It's shame, secrecy and taboo-making that destroys children's innocence, not accurate information.

35965a · 03/02/2024 18:24

We go swimming a lot as a family and I hate tampons. When I have my period, which is always heavy and basically awful, I just tell my children the truth, I have my period and I don’t feel like swimming as it would be messy.

I’ve told them the basics - once a month women’s bodies make an egg and if she doesn’t want to have a baby it comes out with some blood, it doesn’t hurt (lol) but it can give you a little tummy ache sometimes. They accepted that quite well. Now they’re a little older they know in more detail than that but that’s what I’ve told them from when they were quite small. So I think just be open.

CroccyWoccy · 03/02/2024 18:25

Kind of amazed that as a single mother to a 6yo child you’ve managed to avoid the topic! I don’t have enough toilet privacy for my children not to have seen some blood and asked questions.

I’ve told them about what a womb is, and that every month my body makes it all cosy just in case I were to get pregnant, and that if I am not pregnant it gets washed away with blood, then the cycle starts again.

IbizaToTheNorfolkBroads · 03/02/2024 18:26

I told DS at 6. We were driving somewhere and he found a tampon in the glove compartment. He asked we what they were, and did he need any because I always had some? I explained what they were and why..

In the way home he found the rest of the box and said "Mummy, you've got a whole army of these little soldiers!".

It didn't seem to phase him. Just plan something else for that day - but have you tried ModiBodi swimwear?

Queijo · 03/02/2024 18:27

I’m also a single mother and I’m stunned you’ve managed to change your tampons for this long without a child barging in asking why you’re putting a mouse up your bum 😂

Just explain to him in an age appropriate way - mummy bleeds once a month because there isn’t a baby inside her tummy, it happens to most women and it’s nothing to be worried about etc.

EasternStandard · 03/02/2024 18:27

6 year old dd knows

I think it’s important to demystify and bring down any fears

Roadtripwithkids999 · 03/02/2024 18:28

There hasn't been a time my kids haven't known about periods. They never left me alone even in the bathroom. So it was just normal.

itsmyp4rty · 03/02/2024 18:30

DS knew from a very young age as he never let me go toilet alone!

'Mummy why are you putting a mouse up your bum?' is just brilliant.

nadine90 · 03/02/2024 18:31

My boys both knew about them before that age. They inevitably saw pads in the bathroom and asked so I told them. But agree with above about delaying your period - only so you can enjoy your hard earned holiday, not to avoid the conversation with your son x

TheSnowyOwl · 03/02/2024 18:32

My four year old son has grown up never being shielded from periods and the reality of them.

sprigatito · 03/02/2024 18:32

There was a woman on here years ago whose kid asked what pads were for and she replied "for Mummy's poorly bum". She rightly got her (poorly) ass handed to her. Kids don't need to be fed the idea that women's bodies are embarrassing.

clary · 03/02/2024 18:38

Wow yes as others say, please explain it to him in a non-frightening way (tho I think it's OK to say that sometimes it hurts or feels uncomfy, to explain that fact).

I am also amazed that this has not come up before. When my DC were small we only had one bathroom so they all knew about it.

Agree tho how about meds to delay your period so you can swim?

And please encourage your friend to talk to her 8yo dd - she could be starting her periods soon and needs to be able to talk about it.

Fionaville · 03/02/2024 18:39

I think your friend is being the irresponsible one, not telling her 8 year old daughter.
My DCs have always known about them, it's just another bodily function and nothing to be secretive or embarrassed about.

ExtraOnions · 03/02/2024 18:40

My daughter started her periods at 9. We had spoken about periods etc quite openly for years before that. No big deals, no embarrassment, just matter of fact

DinnaeFashYersel · 03/02/2024 18:40

Totally fine

Ponderingwindow · 03/02/2024 18:41

I was once with a volunteer group of 6 year old girls. We were assigned to sort feminine hygiene pads into packets to hand out to women in shelters. One of the girls asked me what they were for. My philosophy is to always give a simple straightforward answer and if the child asks follow up questions answer them. I planned to defer as much as possible in this situation since these weren’t my children. So I just said something about, women use them during their periods. No detail, I just said the word “period”. The girls mother was apparently one of the other parent volunteers and was down the row and the look of daggers she shot me was unbelievable. It didn’t even occur to me that a 6yo girl wouldn’t know about periods. I still have trouble fathoming that there are still parents that treat normal body functions as shameful.