AIBU to be furious that Jnr colleugue's salary now exceeds mine? discrimination?!

[WhatTheActualBeep]

To give some background/context here: I have a decade of experience in my field. My current company was taken over by a much larger company in 2020. This same year I fell pregnant and took a year of maternity leave. Just before my leave, I hired an Assistant that supported me and the Director within my team. My maternity cover didn't work out, and whilst I was away, the Director decided to give some of my duties to this Assistant, whilst covering the remainder of my role themselves.

During my leave, the company was taken over, the Director was made redundant and the Assistant was given the same title as me (no Assistant role existed in the bigger company). Their salary was increased, but still approx 10k below my own.

Fast forward, and I return from maternity, the role I return to is vastly different,
the same title but much of the responsibility/seniority removed. 6 months later
the team gets a new Manager who becomes very buddy-buddy with the Assistant andother team members, and doesn't bother getting to know the team, their experience and work history etc.

I take another period of maternity, and return to find out that the 'Assistant'
has received an 18.5% salary increase, and their salary now exceeds my own (not
my much, but still), and they received a bonus of 15% salary, whilst I, on
maternity, got a 6% increase and a 7% bonus. I have never, in 10 years had a
bonus this low and chalk this up to not being in the 'in crowd' with this manager.

The Assistant has half a decade of experience less than me, does not outperform me in any way (whilst we have the same title, there are many aspects of the role
they are inexperienced in, and these tasks fall to me).

In a recent conversation with the manager, I learned that they have no knowledge of the fact that I actually hired the Assistant in my previous company, they used to report to me, and I have 5 years more experience than them! the VP
actually said 'oh really? I thought you were doing the same role at X company'
when this came up in conversation. Is this not the first thing you do as a new
manager - check out your team's skill-set, strengths and experience?

It's worth mentioning, that whilst I have had two DC, this Assistant has been VERY vocal about their views on motherhood, how they want to ‘live life for themselves’ and don’t ever want children.

I am seeing red about this whole situation. I was effectively demoted on return
from 1st maternity leave to a more junior role and got a whole new team, and
now this junior colleague’s salary is higher than my own despite my experience
exceeding theirs by 5 YEARS. I need to raise the bonus issue with my manager
anyway, as I didn't want to deal with that on maternity but AIBU about the
salary issue?!

How do I even raise this?!

Stop thinking of them as an assistant. A lot can change in 2 years and they were given more responsibility and a promotion. Whether you feel they are capable or not, it has nothing to do with you, nor does their attitude to having children.

Length of time at a company doesn’t always mean more experience anyway.

You should raise any concerns about your pay etc but stop comparing yourself to your colleague! If you recruited them you should be proud they did so well. Lots of people get the chance to step up when colleagues go on maternity, it’s normal.

BUT if you have any concerns about being treated differently due to having children or being on maternity, try calling Pregnant Then Screwed for advice, they are very good.

I've been the boss of people older than me. Who had worked in the industry longer. In my industry there was rarely any tenure, and most of us were self-employed. There was no mucking about re seniority. The best paid were the ones who did the best work. I worked for better people than me at first, as I got better, I got the jobs and employed people to work under me, regardless of age or time in the job- I'd quote for a job on a fee, and anyone working for me would be paid (mostly by the hour) according to competence only. I'd get whatever was left when they'd been paid. Whoever was running a job would normally get paid more, but the risk was always there that if I needed more hours from those working for me than I'd estimated, they'd still get full pay for all their hours, and I could end up getting less than they did.

And there was no such thing as maternity leave.

Perhaps the OP should try that sort of job if she wants to maintain a higher pay rate?

Now don't get me wrong, I'm 100% in favour of maternity leave and tenure- just because I've never had either, or sick pay, or holiday pay (bar one bank holiday in about 1989) doesn't mean I don't support others getting those things. I do. I very much do. But even having said that, OP sounds like a right whinger to me.

It really wasn't worth mentioning this employee doesn't want children. It isn't relevant in any way.

Sounds like she's doing a grand job. Maybe you can learn from her.

She’s not an assistant, she’s the same level as you and has been for a while. I’m 45 and believe me, you’d better come to terms with people you hired exceeding you both in terms of salary and rank if you want to stay sane!

Can't believe how many people are using this argument! This is exactly what causes the gender pay gap. Women ending up with worse career progression and pay due to maternity leaves is exactly what equality legislation and employment rights is supposed to have addressed bt clearly hasn't. OP, please contact Pregnant then Screwed or Maternity Action and ask what they make of the situation. I agree there's nothing wrong with the former assistant progressing and getting more pay etc, but if your own pay and career have been significantly disadvantaged by your maternity leave that is not ok.

You're right, it isn't. But the OP clearly thinks it is. And an attitude like that might well explain why they are having problems at work.
I also wonder what, if anything, provoked the other worker to say that. They could be being unpleasant, but I can also think of a few things that might.....well, people with no kids do often have to pick up a lot of slack- like having to take holidays at rotten times so parents can have their hols when their kids do, filling in when kids are off school sick, and so on. It can be irritating at the time even if you accept the need for it, especially if not handled tactfully by the parent in question. I wonder where the OP stands on all that sort of thing?

Agree with this.

It sounds like you expected everything to be frozen until you came back. Life has gone on without you OP.

All of this, and to be perfectly honest, your op males you sound petulant and like a child

Okay.
People have kids. Fine. I'm all for supporting kids. So maternity/paternity leave, great. But -do people who are caring for sick relatives have the same rights? No. Are parents clamouring for carers to have the same rights even if they themselves aren't carers? Not many that I've heard.

And bear in mind that people do choose to have kids. Other people who don't have or can't have kids may have things they choose to do, things that may (or even may not) have the same or greater value to society as a whole. But they don't get any automatic choice in the matter, even for unpaid leave (other countries do have more of a concept of unpaid leave than we do).

We all make choices, and all choices have consequences. Maternity pay, yes. Reinstatement, yes. But you can't expect the achievements of others in their careers to go unrewarded as well, nor for their gains to be automatically handed to you on a plate when you go back to work. Does she expect her previous assistant's career to be held on ice while she chooses to take maternity leave or what?

I just want to say that I was also that woman in the office harping on about never wanting kids. At the time I’d had 7 miscarriages in 6 years and pretended not to want children to hide the absolute pain of knowing it would never happen for me. Don’t judge other women who make different choices to you, you don’t know everything about her.

if you think you’re being compensated below market rate you need to negotiate or leave, your colleagues compensation is entirely irrelevant to your own. If her pay has highlighted that you’re underpaid that’s a good thing, now you can negotiate from a much stronger position. She’s done you a favour.

When I returned to work after being a SAHM for several years, it was a really humbling experience. I used to be top of my field in the country I worked in - head-hunted by several organisations, and demanding a very healthy salary.

Coming back in (after some time, I know, so my experience will be more extreme), I sat around the table at the Senior Management Team meeting - having been promoted there by dint of the fact that I was the only one in the company doing what I did - and realising that:

a) there were people there who had far less experience but who were far more current with their role's demands ... and with far more room for promotion given their age; and

b) I would never ever get any further than I was right at that moment.

It hit me hard for quite a while, but I realised that that is the condition of being a mother, of having to make choices that cut other options away, and of being older.

It may not feel fair. Life is not fair.

Frankly, you can’t have your cake and eat it.

Her career has only been damaged relative to the other person’s, not in absolute terms.

She has the same grade and salary but is annoyed that a more junior colleague has now caught up. I think it’s inevitable that this is going to happen if you take 2 years out of 3 off. Somebody has to do the work when you aren’t there, and if they do it well they will receive rewards.

It's worth mentioning, that whilst I have had two DC, this Assistant has been VERY vocal about their views on motherhood, how they want to ‘live life for themselves’ and don’t ever want children

Exactly why is it worth mentioning? Do you hope that by saying this you are automatically going to get people on your side against the clueless childless person?

For whatever reason you have not been at your desk for the best part of 2 years.

That person was present and able to impress. Now you are back and instead of being petulant and childish why don't you use this as an opportunity to renew your investment in your career...renegotiate your salary, ask for opportunities oh, and make sure everyone knows you were responsible for hiring this person and use it as an example of your fabulous judgement that he/she has turned out to be such an asset.

I was off work for a year several years ago due to having treatment for and recovering from cancer. Many of the people at the same grade as me progressed in that time and it was really difficult. But now, 20-odd years on, some are in higher positions, some lower, some have left the workplace. Eventually this won't matter. Good luck and please don't do the parent v. Childfree bullshit. It's really not a good look.

I am starting to think that Mumsnet is been attacked by some kind of Andrew Tate fanship. There’s so much ‘anti women working sentiment’ lately seen on a few key threads. It’s odd

Why?!?!?

I worked for 10 years as an engineer and while I was on maternity, I was not contributing to the company output, so there is NO WAY I would expect a bonus. That's utterly ridiculous!

Stuff like this give female employees such a bad name!

Having children is a CHOICE! You need to factor in career breaks into the decision to have children.

I mean this nicely OP, but before you do anything you need to calm down. Otherwise what you say will be seen as a bitter rant.

If you haven't been receiving your contractual bonus whilst on maternity leave you have been discriminated against.

I know it's so weird. I have been a people leader for a long time and, if a bonus is being paid, it would of course include people on parental leave and it would be outrageous if it didn't.

I agree with the majority of posters on here and I think your post comes across as very entitled. You have to accept you are not this other persons senior now. The other person you are referring to has progressed and has the same title as you. Their years of experience mean nothing - it’s their competency and merit that count. It sounds bitter to be comparing their rise vs your (lack therof). If you believe you have genuine grounds to argue that based on performance - not years of experience - your bonus and pay should be higher, then argue on that basis. Maybe focus your energy on asking for more responsibility and demonstrating your skills.

Technically you're two years experience behind now though. I think you now need to get on with your own job now.

ps. I say this as someone who came back from mat leave and was frustrated two people got promoted in my absence. What did I do? Worked my butt off and have had two promotions since.

You’re mixing up different things and being laughably ridiculous to be honest.