DD and her Teddy Bear

[Emirie]

I don't want to say something to DD if it isn't necessary so looking for thoughts.

DD is 17 nearly 18, big summer plans from travelling Europe to party holiday. She's generally independent well adjusted etc.

However DD has a teddy bear, shes had it for 11/12 years, from build a bear, and she never sleeps without it. It's not unusual for DD to come and get the bear before staying at a friends if it is impromptu, she has taken the bear to school a fair few times (in a separate bag, now the bear stays in the car when she's at school if she takes it). Basically she can't be without the bear!!

DD is going to Europe to travel for 4 weeks in July. She is insisting she will take the teddy with her. She's taking her main big backpack then a second one which she will use on days out where they aren't travelling that her Teddy will fit in.

Now the bear is a bit ... worse for wear so no one is likely to steal it and my mum is making the bear a cardigan with a pocket for an AirTag.

But AIBU to think it's not a good idea to take the bear?
I honestly think DD would grieve for the bear like it was a real person if anything happened to it!!

In addition to the airtag make sure it's labelled with phone numbers - we have stikins with our phone number on them and they cover most things in our life, including DS1's emotional support penguin

How decrepit is Teddy? Would she consider taking just an arm or leg?

DS (20) has his replacement teddy at uni, as well as his replacement-replacement Teddy. His OG Teddy is in bits at home. Teddies #2&3 are looking worse for wear and the Subject of FrankinTeddy has been brought up, considering there's probably enough good bits between the 3 of them to make one good one... meanwhile I've got an Ebay alert hoping I can find an identical unused 20 year old teddy somewhere.

Put a tracking tile in it - that’s what we did with dd’s teddy when she went away with school and maybe attach something with her name and phone number so it could be returned if lost.

My sister left her teddy with me when she went travelling. He slept on my bed every night. I missed her terribly, so was glad to have him!

I think she’s mitigating disaster with the air tag. My sister has a beloved ted that had his own chair at her wedding 😂

My daughter's bear has a passport.
Very important document 😃😃😃

He's quite a stickler for routine and so doesn't like travel much though. If it was my daughter and she went travelling without said bear, I'd have to bear sit for the summer. 😄

I'm horrified that you propose dismembering Teddy.

I suggest carefully unpicking a bit of a seam of Teddy (with appropriate anaesthetic of course) and inserting the AirTag. Much safer than a detachable cardigan.

Ohhh no not anywhere near that decrepit!! All limbs remain attached, Teddy is just a bit threadbare in places and was once white but is now grey (after DH placed a black hoodie in the wash with Teddy ... a dark day in our house (pun sort of intended!)).
Teddy is clothed so I think that's helped her remain in slightly better condition!

She is likely to not be the only one. Late teen DD has travelled extensively and her stuffed friend always comes along & young adult DS's GF brought hers on a recent visit to us.

Lol ! 😂

This is sweet and absolutely nothing to be worried about.

I am 30 and I still have a teddy monkey that was the last gift my dad ever give me before he died. I slept with it every night until I was 19 and had moved out with my boyfriend. Even then, it stayed on ny pillow.

When I separated, I began sleeping with the monkey again. I was 25 years old and to this day, if I didnt have a sleep partner, Id cuddle this monkey. Im 30 😂

I remember its arm coming off and its eye fell out, and I was devastated. My mum sewed it all back together though.

A very special teddy. I will be cremated with it when that day comes.

I'm in my 40s and still have a soft toy I was given Christmas 1984. It's an Avon Plush Puppy and went with me on several trips, albeit none of them when I was an adult.

My niece has a soft bunny called "Hoppy" which goes with her everywhere. When she came to London I tasked Hoppy to guard the flat, lest he got lost never to be found again.

My sons have their very first toys a bear and a tiger.
They're both on a shelf now in my room more stitches than anything one has button eyes the other has one and a half eyes is a dirty gray not white anymore .
However i cant sleep without my bear id rather have my bear in bed than any man.

An airline lost my suitcase which had my bear in and I'm still sad for my little teddy 20 years later. He was called Teddy and had a little yellow waistcoat and matching bow tie. I've adopted my mums teddy Henry now but it's not the same. He has two eyes and arms for a start.

I lost my 90s bear as an adult during a house move at some point. I still wonder if he'll ever turn up randomly somewhere. I also look on Ebay sometimes and contemplate getting a replacement but it wouldn't be the same. I still miss that bloody bear! Gutted.

I am about to turn 40, I still have my bear. Once I was an adult the bear got left at home for most holidays - especially for a backpacking type thing as I was just too scared it would get lost. He's elderly now so he isn't allowed out the house and the adorable thing is that my kids when they are feeling a bit sad or ill they get my bear to sleep with as it is like hugging me.

I'd have a chat and explain just how easily things get lost when travelling and a few weeks without the bear is a lot better than it getting lost or ruined. Insurance can cover possessions but it can't cover the feelings of such a treasure.

I fully intend on my bear having his own wee celebration when he turns 40 this year as well - he was a gift when I was born.

I would embroider his home address on him or sew on a label with his home name and address.

I feel stressed just reading about the possibility of him taking an extended solo holiday!

So Teddy is white turned a bit grey in the wash? Teddy absolutely must have a set of brightly coloured pyjamas! This is essential so as not to be missed amongst hotel bed linen when checking out.

My 21 SEN DD sleeps with a cuddly every night. Thankfully it doesn’t have to be one specific toy. When we go traveling, which is lot, the toy must be not too small , so obvious and be either brightly coloured or be the teddy that have the red ladybug pyjamas.

Take the bear if he's that important to her. My mother is still haunted by the time we went on holiday and I was told my (admittedly large) teddy didn't fit in the suitcase so needed to stay home. I threw a tantrum (aged 10) and insisted he came. Whilst we were away, there was a fire and our house burned down... I lost every single toy I had EXCEPT my beloved teddy who was safely with me.

Extreme example, but it does happen!

Kettlewell! Had it been allowed to roam free instead of getting stuck in laundry, his bear might have come back with a scarecrow friend... 👨🏼‍🌾

Oh I wouldn't. I don't think. My dd has similar and she made the sensible decision to leave Bear firmly at home

@LuciaPillson
It's a good festival

Especially with a pub stop

This makes me feel so much better about DS(15) still having a soft toy that goes everywhere .

I'd hide the Air Tag inside the teddy.

This is an adorable thread!

My sister is 42 and her teddy sleeps on her pillow! She's more attached to her cuddly than her 6yo DD is to hers 😊

Happy travels to OP's DD and Teddy!