To wonder if anyone else gets irrationally angry about small stuff

[Thatsgoodfun]

So for instance at the park, DS is on the swing and welly came off . Laughed but then he was kicking his legs on purpose so they came off. Told him to stop it, ended up going home with ds crying and me angry and I’m wondering why it annoyed me so much.

How old is DS? The thing is if you feel irritable often you can’t help that but you could control how you respond. If you’re finding that you can’t or you’re choosing not to then you’ve got a problem to explore.

My DH does sometimes. It's such a shame because we've had some lovely trips out ruined by something seemingly inconsequential 'Right let's just go back to the car!!' seems like such an overreaction. Or we will be getting on really well and so close and then I will say the wrong thing and he shuts down.

This is normally when he's had lots going on/on his plate and he's feeling overloaded/depressed.

Worth figuring out what is causing it OP, as pp said, unlikely to be about the welly itself.

@MCOut he is just 3. I’m actually finding him a lot easier at this age than 2, but toileting is a huge challenge and I have to really force myself to blithely clean up the mess. There’s also instances where he means no harm but is so boisterous and silly it jars somehow.

I don’t think I want to be in touch with the GP but I would probably benefit from some calm sort of meditation or something.

Sertraline.

I am a different and better person thanks to Sertraline. My family is so much happier too.

You’re getting angry at a 3 year old being a very normal 3 year old. You need to speak to your doctor before your prediction of them growing up with horrible childhood memories becomes a reality. I don’t mean that unkindly because I completely get it - and it does sound like PND. The anger will just grow if you don’t get some help and support

DPs typing. He smacks the shit out of the laptop so hard the table shakes. I can't work in the same room as him.

Well you've recognised that you're having these intense emotions, and that it's negatively impacting your little one.

What are you willing to do about it?

Our local mental health services team offer emotional regulation courses, you could see if yours has something similar, or prioritise funding therapy for yourself.

I used to and couldn't really understand why.

At the time, I was struggling with infertility treatment and subconsciously was just mad at the world.

At the time I didn't make the connection between that & irrational anger at someone not moving quick enough when the traffic lights turn green.

Is it possible that there's some other bigger issue in your life that's causing sadness, anger, frustration, resentment etc and this is just how it's coming out?

In the immediate aftermath of having kids, my hormones gave me extreme highs and lows as they were getting back into the menstrual cycle. In the week before my period I get white hot rage at the smallest of things. A few months ago I smashed up a garden fork after it got caught on my jumper. Like, smashed it into the ground until it split in half. But with each passing month, it’s slightly less extreme. It’s fucking awful though, I feel so low beforehand.

I think it’s more likely your cycle kicking off rather than peri, especially as you only had a baby six months ago.

I have become increasingly like this the past two years. I’m 40 this year. I was wondering if I have pmdd. How early can perimenopause begin? I have a stressful home life

No the “whole Karen thing” started from black Americans, satirising the class-based and racially charged hostility they often face.

Such as when a white women called the police because an 8 year old black girl was selling water on her front yard without a permit.

I was reading your post thinking that sounds like me when I'm postpartum. I acted exactly like this postpartum with my first son. I remember screaming and raging because the neighbours were hammering at a reasonable time just because I was putting DS to sleep. I realise it wasn't healthy and I wish I'd spoken to someone. I don't know if it was hormonal or a touch of pnd but it stopped when I stopped breastfeeding and reduced when I got my period back. I'm now 12 months pp with my second and I do have it again but I'm more aware this time so I can stop myself for the most part. It's hard though. I also spoke to a counsellor specialist in pnd / pna who helped me with some coping techniques.

OP i definitely had started to get peri-menopause symptoms around 43 - one of which was irritation and occaisional rage. And my DC wasn't as young as yours (ie yours would likely be more infuriating because young kids are)

as for how you tell - you can't exactly. The NHS can check your hormones level but they will only come back to say you are or arent' in full menopause, not much more detailed that that.

Do speak to your GP though - just tell the nosy receptionists that it's about a hormone check up - and ask GP what they suggest re tests and options for medication (although you may well not want or need them yet)

Yes I was like this until I started SNRI's

Racism vs misogyny. No wonder people feel angry.

But then you end up with a child caked in mud and yet more shit to clean up. I get it OP.

When my younger child was about 3 I found reading ‘The Book You Wish Your Parents Had Read’ by Philippa Perry really helpful. It helped me to slow down a bit and connect with my child a bit better rather than getting frustrated. I think we are so used to achieving and being efficient and small children are frankly frustrating and it’s also not evolutionarily normal for us as a species to just be one adult alone with small children on and on and on, day after day. It’s hard being the only grown up (even IGA partner is there some of the time)

Yes. Being awake and listening to DH sleeping peacefully 🤣