To think most people I know live anove their means?

[PrincessBananaH]

I just came across a statement that really got me thinking which is that, essentially, you should always live below your means in order to be financially secure. It’s a pretty simple statement but I don’t think many of us follow this in life. Most people I know are trying to keep up with the Jones, stretching their mortgages to almost unafforable amounts to buy bigger houses instead of being happy in a modest home, going on lots of holidays and dinners out etc.
I am trying hard to save currently and with lots of family expenses and childcare I often think we’d be better off living below our means in the future years to keep building more financial stability, however I find it hard when everyone around us is trying to “have it all”.
AIBU to think most people don’t want to live below their means?

I never cease to be amazed at how many people seem to know the ins and outs of their friends and family finances.

DEBT FINANCED OUTWARD PROSPERITY is a real thing. The consumer culture is so scary to me and I love to shop. But not push a button a have food a car and a meal delivered to me kind of shopping. I grew up modestly and had less than my peers not a lot less but still less. This has always tempered my spending. Together DH and I have a high income and yet I continually think …..how do people afford all that???

To be honest, I think some folks fall into a trap of assuming it’s debt and living above their means when they see people have stuff they personally couldn’t afford. They can’t fathom it’s earnings

in reality credit checks are very stringent these days, and you need the income to pay the debt. It’s not like the 80s or 90s anymore.

sure some folks have significant debt they got themselves into over time, and circumstances changed, credit cards are often an issue, but it’s clearly not the majority.

I definitely live below my means. I kept my mortgage borrowing to a modest amount that I knew I could comfortably afford. This means my home isn't swish but I'd rather have the financial peace of mind.
I moved somewhere where I wouldn't need a car so that's another cost I save on.
I chose a home with the lowest council tax band and no service charge.
I have a spare room that I can rent out if I fall on hard times.
I don't pay for netflix, sky, TV license etc. No TV.
No children (big saving!)
My phone contract is £10 SIM only and I hotspot for all my internet so no broadband fees.
I've insulated my home to the hilt so my energy bills are minimal.
I've cut my food costs down by only buying what I will definitely eat, so I have very little food waste.
I give myself a modest amount of fun money and general shopping each month
I use a budgeting app so I'm on top of all spending

All this makes me sound really skint but the upshot is that I now save £1,250 per month on my single average salary. I'd much rather live below my means and then extra savings for security and flexibility.

Yes majority of people I know do. Ridiculously expensive cars on low salaries, everything on finance, debt racking up.

Mine and DP's view is that if we can't afford it outright then we can't afford it (apart from our mortgage) we have no debt and never have, live in a modest 3 bed semi, own both our cars outright because we saved for them and we each have healthy savings each and a separate joint savings. We have average salaries but live well within our means so that we can afford a few abroad holidays away each year and lots of nice days/trips our with our toddler and a few UK breaks here and there. I couldn't sleep at night if I was up to my eyes in debt.

I live above my means, but it's not because I want to keep up with the Jones's. It's to afford rent on a tiny flat and drive an old car.

I wish I could simply spend less, but any tinier and I'd be living in a cupboard!

I own a small 3 bed house and I love it. I'm forever being told by friends that it's time to upgrade.

I'm almost mortgage free, I have a private garden, I have savings and disposable income and can retire when I'm 60.

They are constantly moaning about the cost of living, their 4 figure mortgage payments, paying mortgages until their 70s. They're out of the house for 10/12 hours a day just to pay for the lifestyle.

I don't understand why I would want that. I'm happy.

It makes up for the shit weather I think .....

I read on here once not to do something (holidays etc) if you can’t afford to do it 3 times over. I think it’s a good rule.

We live within our means (not saving but not in debt). Most people I know have tried to cut back (due the cost of living) in the last year or so.

For example my brother and his fiancé have decided to get married next year rather than this (to give themselves extra time to save money). My parents have decided to continue working, rather than retire this year. We decided not to get another dog, after our last dog died last year, partly because of costs. We also budget monthly and try to meal plan.

I don’t know the exact details of anyone else’s income v expenditure but when people talk about money it is how expensive everything is and how they are cutting down.

I live within my means but people have different priorities. I go on holiday reasonably often, eat out and do lots of family day trips. But I don't have expensive technology or clothes, no fancy kitchen equipment, old car, have no investments or savings, don't have any TV subscriptions, don't spend a lot of hair, make up, a big house, or other things I'd have if I earned more money. I sometimes think that my family think I live above my means because I have the same winter coat every year and if they ask I say I can't afford another one. But in reality I'd rather spend £100 going somewhere fun with DC in my old coat.

It’s cause people don’t want to feel like they are slogging their guts out for no reason. At least they are driving a nice car or have a nice trip planned to make all those hours count. Miserable existence to max out your working energy to simply pay mortgage and buy basic food, no treats etc. Be it right or wrong - social media is also a factor.

I know some who definitely do live above their means. Conversely I know some who live below. We’ve lived both. Sometimes circumstances mean things don’t go to plan. I don’t think people always decide to live above their means, more circumstances mean they have to or it’s a temporary solution with an end plan to resolve it, or maybe they just took their eye off the ball.
Given a crystal ball, we could all probably do better, financial planning can be a bit of a gamble - yes you can save and invest, but there’s still a lot of external factors which can thwart the best laid plans.

I have been in debt and never want to be there again so I live within my means. We don’t have a foreign holiday every year, I saved up to buy my new phone outright rather than have an expensive contract. We have one car and a mortgage we can afford even if interest goes up.

I wouldn't have a clue.
I certainly know how people around me live, but whether it's within their means or not... don't know without having full access to their tax returns and asset statements.
Bit of a weird question really.

I have always lived within my means. My parents did too. And all 3 of my adult children do (although one of them does have a tendency to spend everything they have so doesn't have savings which could them issues of course)

I had to live above my means between 2014-2019 because of a divorce. It was absolutely horrible. I can still feel the panic and worry now. The divorce led me to have to retrain because I couldn't practice my old career well (due to serious DV in my marriage) and I didn't want to end up with a SCR/Child Death overview on my conscience. I had 3DC to house, feed and clothe. My means couldn't fund the basics, nevermind keeping up with the Jones's - all in all I came out with 5K student debt, approx 12K unsecured debt in 2019. Some of that unsecured debt was to pay back my DP's for the 'gift' that went towards a too good to miss opportunity to buy a house Shared Ownership and some of it was divorce costs, rest of it was for IKEA furniture, petrol and food though so it wasn't frittered.

I paid off the student debt quickly when I got my first job after retraining- I have about 7K unsecured left which I am slowly but surely paying off. My new DH and I overpay our mortgage, have modest savings and my long term plan means I will most likely be unsecured debt free in the next 5 years and mortgage free by 60. I have a great pension from my new career and I am lucky that I have doubled my salary since that first graduate job and that our household income is high now. Sometimes 'living above your means' is due to shitty circumstances. But to avoid getting into that debt I would have had to continue experiencing broken bones and marital rape. It was worth every penny to be safe.

Most people I know are living within their means I'd say. They're paying off mortgages, saving into ISAs, paying into pensions, putting aside money for kids. Basically reducing mortgage debt and building wealth for retirement and the next generation. That's the game basically.

Property prices are really high, and anyone who's parents or grandparents couldn't or didn't play the game, is going to struggle to get on the housing ladder in large parts of the country. But those high property prices are supported by (amongst other things) a LOT of people who's parents and grandparents did play the game, and passed on wealth to help the next generation.

I no longer use credit cards so live within my means.

I don't know anyone that lives above their means. Everyone is well below and thinking about pensions and University education. It's easier to do so when you have larger income and still have enough money for treats and nice holidays.

The kind of prolific spending on status items would have been what we all did in our late 20s and early 30s when we all had more money than sense and no eye to the future. You give a University graduate £100k a year and no time to spend anything because they work in the city and they will just buy nice bags and shoes and have a ridiculously expensive gym membership.

We're all thankfully older and wiser now. We all like treats, theatre and nice holidays. I would say amongst my circle excessive displays of wealth are looked down upon. It's reverse snobbery now 😂🤷

Lots of people do live above their means. Holidays are seen as essentials now - just look at the period after lockdown, when so many people just had to have a holiday.
When I was young, a holiday was a week at the seaside. No one I knew ever went abroad.

At Christmas we got one moderately big present, and then things like colouring pencils selection box etc. Now children get mountains of gifts, and parents feel like they have failed if their children don't get a ton of plastic tat at Christmas.

It’s surely only possible for a short amount of time. If you spend say £500 more each month than you earn that’s 30k within 5 years even with no interest. I’m not sure how people are getting so much credit now that property prices aren’t rising.

My friend used to constantly overspend and re-mortgage to pay off the debt, and that works (sort of) if the property prices are rising. Now they’re not rising and his last re-mortgage application was refused.

This I’m surprised by the amount of unsecured debt some people have. Even just the amount some people pay for their car each month seems mad to me.

I know one of my acquaintances has a Mercedes SUV type thing on finance and it costs more than his mortgage which is mad to me.

Most are living above their means right now as the basics cost more than the average wage.

I'm on disability and the total basics (rent/food/heat/electric/water) add up to more than I get in benefits so I'm stuck going further and further into debt every month. I can't cut back on anything else, I'm already down to one meal a day.

I thought I'd get some breathing room in april when the yearly rise happens but my landlord just told me my rent is going up by more than the extra I'm getting so it's only going to be worse.

I don’t view simply having a mortgage as living beyond your means. It’s either that or pay rent, both are just a monthly payment so you have somewhere to live. Living beyond your means to me would be purchasing the most expensive property available to you and then struggling with your monthly outgoings. Or renting a house where the monthly payments are high, even if there is the option to pay lower rent in a cheaper area. It all really comes down to choices for some people, they want that designer bag/ holiday/ new furniture so it goes on the credit card, the new car every 3 years so they use finance, the bigger house so they have a huge mortgage or rent payments. I think we all know people who do this, it’s just their way of life.