Dog Sitter Hacked off Dog’s Eyelashes

[Elvisthedonkey]

The “dog sitter” being my DMiL.

We have a dog with beautiful long eyebrows and eyelashes, which droop down over her face. Quite typical of the breed. DH had asked DMiL if she could look after her for a few days as we had to go away at very short notice. She has a large house and her own dog so we hoped it would not be too much of an imposition.

She took her and seemed fine about it but when we picked her up she had hacked off her lovely long eyebrows and eyelashes. It has not even been neatly done - they are uneven and tufty. “Hacked” really is the word. It looks awful.

Our dog had very obviously been to a dog groomer very recently - so surely she would realise that if we had wanted them cut we would have asked the dog groomer to do it? Or done it ourselves?

I’m weirdly upset about it - we loved her long eyelashes - and I can’t help thinking it was some weird passive aggressive move (she doesn’t like me and has form). I’m not sure if I should say something or if that would just make me sound ungrateful. I’m sure if I asked her she should would say she did it because they were getting in the dog’s way or something (they weren’t) and she was trying to neaten them up.

AIBU? Should I say something?

I knew it was a spaniel straight away. Mine in the past had beautiful eyelashes. Someone did it to my boy before we rescued him and sadly they never grew again. They did his whiskers too and it still makes me want to murder them. Protect your dog and don’t see that witch again

yanbu - but i wouldn't say anything the juice ain't worth the squeeze. Just don't ask her / let her look after the dog again.

Its a actually damaging to the dog’s eyes!!!

OP said upthread somewhere that her DH picked the dog up and didn’t notice what had been done.

That’s a control mechanism to get away with the things she does. I’d be explaining very clearly that what she did was unacceptable, damaging to the dog and upsetting for you. And that as a result she doesn’t get anywhere near the dog unsupervised again. I’d also want to know why she did it.

MiL had absolutely no right to go anywhere near your dog with scissors
I'm sure she wouldn't like the same done to her dog
I don't get why you didn't mention it!
If she's offended so what!

Sadly had this happen to my dog

My dad cut off beautiful wispy blond strands on the back of my girl’s ears- very unusual for her breed. He thought it made her look scruffy

My heart does sink when I look back at old photos. But she’s happy and healthy and that’s all that matters.

This

She sounds like a generally unpleasant person from what you've described. Why couldn't she have checked first before doing something like that? I'm from a 'dog' family and we all regularly dogsit for each other for anything from overnight to 3 weeks. We're all pretty chill, have good relationships and trust each other to do the 'right' thing, but I wouldn't dream of cutting anything without quickly checking first!

Which means that she is either genuinely thoughtless / didn't see the issue OR it's a nasty little way of asserting some control. Either way I would make other arrangements for your dog in future.

And honestly? Have the conversation. Let her get upset if she wants to. Feel the uncomfortable stuff and move on. How she reacts is up to her but I would be fucking LIVID if it was my dog.

"Please don't cut anything off my dog" job done, disengage.

You sound very tolerant OP (not meant as a criticism!)

Please don't take this the wrong way but is it really that much of a problem? I do not kean this to offend, but is your DH bothered by it?

She's not harmed your dog, shes just cut some fur. I could understand if she had all the fur shaved off during winter, or if you had a show dog that was about to enter a competition, etc.

It's a dog- its not going to be bullied, it isn't going to be upset or self-conscious. It's eyelashes/fur will grow back.

Just get your husband to ask what happened- even if she gets defensive he can just say please don't do it again.

Even if she did it to spite you, you are falling right into her trap. I do understand little things build up but please try not to let it bother you. Either ask her what happened or leave it. The longer you leave it, the more awkward it's going to be to bring it up.

If someone thought we had the kind of relationship where they could just take a pair of scissors to my dog's face without asking, I would presume that it's also the kind of relationship where I can say "what the hell happened to fluffy's hair? I spend £££ on getting her groomed every x weeks and then you just hack chunks out of her coat with your kitchen scissors!?"

Having said that, I know a dog with eyelashes like the dog in the picture OP posted, and I hate them 😂 I can feel it if I have a bit of fluff stuck in my lashes, the thought of inches of hair flapping about every time I blink makes me shudder.